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Default Witch Doctors Endorse Obama! - 10-30-2008, 10:34 PM

THIS just in; The evil witchdoctors in the jungles of South America have endorsed Obama, and are hard at work casting spells and begging satan to give the election to him! I'm told there will be video to come.

Quote:
Obama has the support of Peruvian faith-healers

LIMA, Peru (AP) - Barack Obama apparently can count on the support of a majority of Peruvian faith healers. Each of the 11 shamans in a Peruvian faith-healing organization said Wednesday that they have foreseen victory in the U.S. presidential race: nine for Democrat Obama and two for his Republican rival John McCain.

Blowing incense over a sacred llama fetus perched on a bed of coca leaves next to posters of the leading candidates, the shamans shook rattles, chanted "up, Obama, up!" and threw flowers at their images.

"Obama is growing stronger, I've seen that he has the spiritual support of Martin Luther King and John F. Kennedy to protect him," Juan Osco, president of the Apus-Inka healers association, told The Associated Press. "He's going to win."

Mary Gomez, a healer from the city of Chiclayo, said she has seen that Obama "will win and he will change history ... he is going to help all the Latinos living in the United States."

The shamans whistled, chanted and rubbed both posters with Andean spirit-totems, crucifixes, a statue of a dark-skinned Jesus and other idols to scare away bad spirits and negative energies they said might cause a fair and democratic election.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Witch Doctors Endorse Obama! - 10-30-2008, 10:43 PM

Sounds bizarre.
Almost as bizarre as someone thinking that a carpenter God who sacrificed himself to himself so he could let people into heaven is going to make McCain president.


Now that Obama is president I get to watch my wife have one of those black guys he promised her.
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Default Re: Witch Doctors Endorse Obama! - 10-31-2008, 12:49 AM

You need to listen to this, buster. Maybe it'll clear up your head a little bit.

http://www.landoverbaptist.org/audio/pod/crazy.mp3
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Default Re: Witch Doctors Endorse Obama! - 10-31-2008, 01:04 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
THIS just in; The evil witchdoctors in the jungles of South America have endorsed Obama, and are hard at work casting spells and begging satan to give the election to him! I'm told there will be video to come.
Sarah Palin has her own godly prayer warriors countering the works of Satan. There is no doubt in my mind that the blessings that her godly preachers have placed upon Sarah will radiate to John McCain.



The ingrate who posted that video calls that tar skinned fellow a "witchdoctor" and attempts to mock Sister Palin, but we know that there is a difference between a satanic witch doctor from Peru and godly witch hunter from Africa.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars 

 
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Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Witch Doctors Endorse Obama! - 10-31-2008, 02:23 AM

Jesus is obviously better than these ooga-booga demons.



Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Witch Doctors Endorse Obama! - 10-31-2008, 03:36 AM

Next thing you know, Catholics will be endorsing Obama.
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Buckminster Carlson Buckminster Carlson is offline
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Default Re: Witch Doctors Endorse Obama! - 10-31-2008, 03:40 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Jingles View Post
Next thing you know, Catholics will be endorsing Obama.
Too late

http://www.catholic.org/politics/story.php?id=27820
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