The Landover Baptist Church
Like us or burn

Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > False Religions and Cults

False Religions and Cults Catholics, Wiccans, Lutherans, Satanists, Mormons, and more!

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 02-22-2009, 01:38 AM
Nicole's Avatar
Nicole Nicole is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 65
Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Arrow Women: keep your hands by your side and not in your pockets

I've read several things on this site reguarding men masturbating, but you have nothing about women masturbating. Is there a reason for that? Women do masturbate you know.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 02-22-2009, 01:43 AM
Nurse Clampett's Avatar
Nurse Clampett Nurse Clampett is offline
Jesus's Favorite Nurse
Forum Member

True Christian Lady True Christian Beauty Bronze Tither Best Pie Cleanest Kitchen One Year/1000 posts Christian Love Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus True Christian Caucasian True Scientist™ Jailed for JESUS 

Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Landover Basement
Posts: 976
Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nicole View Post
I've read several things on this site reguarding men masturbating, but you have nothing about women masturbating. Is there a reason for that? Women do masturbate you know.
What for? It's a sin and everyone knows the female orgasm is just a myth.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 02-22-2009, 01:47 AM
Nicole's Avatar
Nicole Nicole is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 65
Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nurse Clampett View Post
What for? It's a sin and everyone knows the female orgasm is just a myth.
You're just saying that because you've never had one.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:07 AM
Nurse Clampett's Avatar
Nurse Clampett Nurse Clampett is offline
Jesus's Favorite Nurse
Forum Member

True Christian Lady True Christian Beauty Bronze Tither Best Pie Cleanest Kitchen One Year/1000 posts Christian Love Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus True Christian Caucasian True Scientist™ Jailed for JESUS 

Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Landover Basement
Posts: 976
Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Quote:
Ezekiel 16:17 Thou hast also taken thy fair jewels of my gold and of my silver, which I had given thee, and madest to thyself images of men, and didst commit whoredom with them,
There's what the Bible has to say about sex toys.


Quote:
You're just saying that because you've never had one.
Mr. Ratched is a considerate Christian husband who blesses me with chloroform before attempting to beget a little Christian soldier upon me.
You only wish such a man would even look your sinful way.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:18 AM
Nicole's Avatar
Nicole Nicole is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 65
Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nurse Clampett View Post
There's what the Bible has to say about sex toys.




Mr. Ratched is a considerate Christian husband who blesses me with chloroform before attempting to beget a little Christian soldier upon me.
You only wish such a man would even look your sinful way.
I don't use sex toys, I use my finger.
I am not sinful. Masturbation is a natural part of life. Many many people do it.
Masturbation vs pre marital sex. Which would you rather I do?
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:24 AM
Nurse Clampett's Avatar
Nurse Clampett Nurse Clampett is offline
Jesus's Favorite Nurse
Forum Member

True Christian Lady True Christian Beauty Bronze Tither Best Pie Cleanest Kitchen One Year/1000 posts Christian Love Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus True Christian Caucasian True Scientist™ Jailed for JESUS 

Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Landover Basement
Posts: 976
Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Neither. Try marriage.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:27 AM
Nicole's Avatar
Nicole Nicole is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 65
Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nurse Clampett View Post
Neither. Try marriage.
I'm 18. I don't want to get married now. I want to wait a few years. But I still have all this sexual frustration. And thats where masturbation comes in. You should try it sometime. If feels sooooo good!
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:31 AM
Nurse Clampett's Avatar
Nurse Clampett Nurse Clampett is offline
Jesus's Favorite Nurse
Forum Member

True Christian Lady True Christian Beauty Bronze Tither Best Pie Cleanest Kitchen One Year/1000 posts Christian Love Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus True Christian Caucasian True Scientist™ Jailed for JESUS 

Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Landover Basement
Posts: 976
Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™
Default Re: Women Masturbating

You sorely vex me harlot! I tell you what, go walk down as many dark alleys as possible. With any luck you'll get raped, if people like you can be raped.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:37 AM
Nicole's Avatar
Nicole Nicole is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 65
Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nurse Clampett View Post
You sorely vex me harlot! I tell you what, go walk down as many dark alleys as possible. With any luck you'll get raped, if people like you can be raped.
Clearly you're just upset because becuase you were never allowed to masturbate as a teen and now you're taking you're bulit up anger out on me.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:42 AM
Bob4God's Avatar
Bob4God Bob4God is offline
Moderator
Arms Dealer for CHRIST
Hands folded for Jesus
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ True Heterosexual™ True Christian Provider™ award Gunfest '06 2008 Witch Hunt Award Silver Tither Real American™ Heaven Bound Home Schooled Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture Super Soaker Baptism Award True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Ex-Gay Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Porn Resistant Persecuted Pro-Life TC Bravery Christian Love Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus 

Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: On the Straight and Narrow (Earthly location: Freehold, Iowa)
Posts: 5,211
Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Women Masturbating

You are a revolting wench! I can't wait until you go too blind to see your screen and your palms are too hairy to feel the keyboard!

BURN IN HELL OR REPENT!
__________________

The eyes of the LORD are in every place, beholding the evil and the good.
- Proverbs 15:3

CHILDREN'S STORY: TIMMY ON TRIAL


CHRISTIAN ADVICE AND MESSAGES OF HOPE! GOD'S GREATEST HITS!


Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:43 AM
Nurse Clampett's Avatar
Nurse Clampett Nurse Clampett is offline
Jesus's Favorite Nurse
Forum Member

True Christian Lady True Christian Beauty Bronze Tither Best Pie Cleanest Kitchen One Year/1000 posts Christian Love Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus True Christian Caucasian True Scientist™ Jailed for JESUS 

Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Landover Basement
Posts: 976
Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™Nurse Clampett is a True Christian™
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Clearly you're a bored teenager looking to gain attention by posting filth on a Christian site. Did mom and dad ground you this weekend? Are you a goth by chance?
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:47 AM
Nicole's Avatar
Nicole Nicole is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 65
Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bob4God View Post
You are a revolting wench! I can't wait until you go too blind to see your screen and your palms are too hairy to feel the keyboard!

BURN IN HELL OR REPENT!
I've been masturbating since I was 15, and I can still see. Those are just old wives tales.

And how bout I not, and say I did.
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:50 AM
Bob4God's Avatar
Bob4God Bob4God is offline
Moderator
Arms Dealer for CHRIST
Hands folded for Jesus
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ True Heterosexual™ True Christian Provider™ award Gunfest '06 2008 Witch Hunt Award Silver Tither Real American™ Heaven Bound Home Schooled Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture Super Soaker Baptism Award True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Ex-Gay Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Porn Resistant Persecuted Pro-Life TC Bravery Christian Love Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus 

Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: On the Straight and Narrow (Earthly location: Freehold, Iowa)
Posts: 5,211
Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nicole View Post
I've been masturbating since I was 15, and I can still see. Those are just old wives tales.

And how bout I not, and say I did.
Give me one good reason why you wouldn't want to give your heart to CHRIST?
__________________

The eyes of the LORD are in every place, beholding the evil and the good.
- Proverbs 15:3

CHILDREN'S STORY: TIMMY ON TRIAL


CHRISTIAN ADVICE AND MESSAGES OF HOPE! GOD'S GREATEST HITS!


Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:50 AM
Nicole's Avatar
Nicole Nicole is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 65
Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nurse Clampett View Post
Clearly you're a bored teenager looking to gain attention by posting filth on a Christian site. Did mom and dad ground you this weekend? Are you a goth by chance?
I've never been grounded.
No I'm not goth, I'm Wiccan, but thats beside the point. I've got plenty of Christian friends who masturbate. Seriously you should try it. You'll wonder how you ever lived this long without it.
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:53 AM
Athiest FTW's Avatar
Athiest FTW Athiest FTW is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 31
Athiest FTW is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Athiest FTW is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Athiest FTW is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nicole View Post
You're just saying that because you've never had one.
Nice
Reply With Quote
  #16  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:53 AM
Nicole's Avatar
Nicole Nicole is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 65
Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bob4God View Post
Give me one good reason why you wouldn't want to give your heart to CHRIST?
I don't believe in that stuff.

Give me one good reason why women shouldn't masturbate
Reply With Quote
  #17  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:54 AM
Bob4God's Avatar
Bob4God Bob4God is offline
Moderator
Arms Dealer for CHRIST
Hands folded for Jesus
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ True Heterosexual™ True Christian Provider™ award Gunfest '06 2008 Witch Hunt Award Silver Tither Real American™ Heaven Bound Home Schooled Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture Super Soaker Baptism Award True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Ex-Gay Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Porn Resistant Persecuted Pro-Life TC Bravery Christian Love Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus 

Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: On the Straight and Narrow (Earthly location: Freehold, Iowa)
Posts: 5,211
Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Bob4God will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nicole View Post
I don't believe in that stuff.

Give me one good reason why women shouldn't masturbate
You've already been given scripture that tells you that the LORD your GOD finds it repulsive! That's reason enough!
__________________

The eyes of the LORD are in every place, beholding the evil and the good.
- Proverbs 15:3

CHILDREN'S STORY: TIMMY ON TRIAL


CHRISTIAN ADVICE AND MESSAGES OF HOPE! GOD'S GREATEST HITS!


Reply With Quote
  #18  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:56 AM
Nicole's Avatar
Nicole Nicole is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 65
Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Nicole is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Quote:
Originally Posted by Athiest FTW View Post
Nice
Thanks.
Someone needs to educate these people of the wonders of the female orgasm.
Reply With Quote
  #19  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:58 AM
Pastor Al E Pistle's Avatar
Pastor Al E Pistle Pastor Al E Pistle is offline
Christ's Cōnsiliārius
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 9,310
Pastor Al E Pistle has disabled reputation
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nicole View Post
I don't believe in that stuff.

Give me one good reason why women shouldn't masturbate
You will go blind.
__________________
Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


Reply With Quote
  #20  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:59 AM
Athiest FTW's Avatar
Athiest FTW Athiest FTW is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 31
Athiest FTW is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Athiest FTW is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Athiest FTW is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Women Masturbating

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nicole View Post
Thanks.
Someone needs to educate these people of the wonders of the female orgasm.
Well, I was just saying nice cause you got her good but yeah
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
slutpocalypse, women are unclean

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here

The information presented here is Biblically accurate. Opinions concerning the technical difficulties, fitness requirements, safety, and ratings of self-crucifixion, flagellation, stoning, destroying enemies of GOD utterly, without mercy, and other activities inherent in Christianity are subjective and may differ from yours or others' opinions; therefore be warned that you must exercise your own judgment as to the difficulty and your ability to safely protect yourself from the inherent risks and dangers. Do not use the information provided on this site unless you are a True Christian ™ who understands and accepts the risks of participating in these activities. Landover Baptist Church makes reasonable efforts to include accurate and up to date information on this website, errors or omissions sometimes occur, therefore the information contained on here is provided "as is" and without warranties of any kind either expressed or implied. Viewing, reading, or any other use of the information contained within this web site is purely the voluntary will of the viewer or user. You, 'the viewer' or 'user' shall not hold the publisher, owner, authors or other contributors of The Jesus Experience responsible for any incidents related directly or indirectly to the Experience. Landover Baptist Church, et. al., assumes no liability or responsibility for your actions.


All times are GMT. The time now is 05:39 AM.


Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1999, 2009 all rights reserved