Help, I think my plumber made a homosexual pass at me!

[Meek and Humble]

Well, I have been having problems with my kitchen sink, so I called up my (former) friend, who is a plumber and asked him to take a look at it. I leave him to his work as I went into the other room to grab something, and when I came back, I found him (barf) bent over, showing off his disgusting rear-end, apparently trying to entice me into sodomizing him!

Well of course I quickly grabbed my shotgun and told him to get out of my house, firing it into the air a few times for good measure.

Now what should I do about this? I can't stand the fact that a good friend of mine is actually a homer, and lives just a few blocks away. Should I tell his wife that he tried to rape me? Should I try to bash the gay demon out of him? And is there anyway to test whether he contaminated my house with the AIDS?

[Brother Lazarus]

Re: Help, I think my plumber made a homosexual pass at me!

Sounds like a bad day. Unless you actually sodomized him or he attempted to bleed on you, you're probably safe from AIDS. You may want to wash in some disinfectant for good measure. What's more important may be the fact you're left with an unfinished sink. Where will the dishes be washed? If you have a house Negress maybe she can wash them outside with a garden hose and some good dishwashing liquid. If you don't have a house Negress you may want to eat out until you find another plumber. Preferably a True Christian plumber.

I guess there is the possibility you have an automatic dishwasher, but I don't find them to be very Godly. Dishwashing should be done by a woman or a house Negress.
Yours in Christ
Brother Lazarus

[Larry Lee]

Re: Help, I think my plumber made a homosexual pass at me!

With all due respect, HB, you're the one who asked him to attend to your plumbing... Do you have some terrible, yet disgusting personal secret we need to lift up in prayer for you?

[SayvedByTheLord]

Re: Help, I think my plumber made a homosexual pass at me!

It's too late Brother Basher, homers breath the AID's out into the room. You may already be infected.

[Glendora Christianson]

Re: Help, I think my plumber made a homosexual pass at me!

At the very least, I think your plumber "friend" needs a coin slot protector.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Help, I think my plumber made a homosexual pass at me!

I suppose I am fortunate. All of the homers who made improper advanced toward me are deceased. And all of the people who pissed me off, knowingly or unknowingly are deceased. And everyone who owed me money and made an excuse...gone to their reward. Praise JESUS!

[Brother Lazarus]

Re: Help, I think my plumber made a homosexual pass at me!

I suppose I am fortunate. All of the homers who made improper advanced toward me are deceased. And all of the people who pissed me off, knowingly or unknowingly are deceased. And everyone who owed me money and made an excuse...gone to their reward. Praise JESUS!

I understand completely your first two points about the homers and those that piss you off. I am wondering how the death of those that owe you money help your financial status.

Not intended to piss you off unknowingly!

Yours in Christ
Brother Lazarus

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Help, I think my plumber made a homosexual pass at me!

I understand completely your first two points about the homers and those that piss you off. I am wondering how the death of those that owe you money help your financial status.

Not intended to piss you off unknowingly!

Yours in Christ
Brother Lazarus

Their relatives paid off lest, as Christ said, a worse fate befall them.

[Brother Lazarus]

Re: Help, I think my plumber made a homosexual pass at me!

Their relatives paid off lest, as Christ said, a worse fate befall them.

Ah, that is Jesus inspired wisdom. I shall remember that.

Yours in Christ
Brother Lazarus

[evil dude]

Re: Help, I think my plumber made a homosexual pass at me!

Well, I have been having problems with my kitchen sink, so I called up my (former) friend, who is a plumber and asked him to take a look at it. I leave him to his work as I went into the other room to grab something, and when I came back, I found him (barf) bent over, showing off his disgusting rear-end, apparently trying to entice me into sodomizing him!

Well of course I quickly grabbed my shotgun and told him to get out of my house, firing it into the air a few times for good measure.

Now what should I do about this? I can't stand the fact that a good friend of mine is actually a homer, and lives just a few blocks away. Should I tell his wife that he tried to rape me? Should I try to bash the gay demon out of him? And is there anyway to test whether he contaminated my house with the AIDS?

SO he had pants on that didn't fit him..........so that means he is trying to have gay sex with you?

[Jethro]

Re: Help, I think my plumber made a homosexual pass at me!

He is trolling, you seem to be able to readily identify gays.

SO he had pants on that didn't fit him..........so that means he is trying to have gay sex with you?

[thatguy]

Re: Help, I think my plumber made a homosexual pass at me!

Your dumb... Maybe he was fixing your leaking sink????? How about you try getting underneath a sink while standing up... I'll pay you a lot of money if you do (unless, of course, you're a midget, in which case you have an unfair advantage...). Seriously, that's ridiculous.

[Meek and Humble]

Re: Help, I think my plumber made a homosexual pass at me!

I don't mind that he was bending over to fix my sink, I mind that he was exposing himself to me, like an animal in heat! Typical of sodomite dogs!

[thatguy]

Re: Help, I think my plumber made a homosexual pass at me!

Ok, fine. How would YOU fix a sink then?

[Meek and Humble]

Re: Help, I think my plumber made a homosexual pass at me!

I just said it's not the fact that he was bent over that bothered me. It's the fact that he had slid down his pants to expose his backside to me that bothers me. How thick is that skull of yours???