Can True Christian™ Women get the Menopause?

[Rachel_Pierce]

I was reading up on how using Satanic birth control pill, using other UnGodly birth control methods, indulging in a whorish and sexually promiscuous lifestyle, and sexually transmitted diseases, (and brain retardation) can cause somthing called 'the Menopause'. I'd never heard of this menopause thing before, but from what i've read it can make you infertile, and women grow moustaches and get hairy faces like men! Disgusting! It sounds like something only a Circus Freak would get, but from doing a little research, this is clearly something that a lot of women get.

That got me to thinking, can True Christians suffer from this Menopause thing? It seems all the things that can cause it are clearly Satanic. My Grandmother was still popping out little soldiers for Christ, right up till she died at 42, and she never got no Menopause. Can someone please enlighten me?

[HTannor]

Re: Can True Christian™ Women get the Menopause?

Oh, Rachel, should that tragedy ever happen to you, you may as well do this:

[Rachel_Pierce]

Re: Can True Christian™ Women get the Menopause?

Oh, Rachel, should that tragedy ever happen to you, you may as well do this:

Indeed, Godly Mr Tannor, sir, but I have no doubt that will never happen to me. God will protect me from such sicknesses. In truth, I don't think I've EVER met a True Christian woman with a hairy face, and I'm sure it's something Satanic. Possibly Demons cause the Menopause by killing your unborn babies, and turning your hormones into a man's. This is something that makes sense, especially after reading THIS forum on the sickness.

menopause has made me think i was losing my mind at times, i feel like i've been possessed by demons...anyone else have it this bad?

Note: If you THINK you are possessed by Demons, you probably are.

yes, and it scared me to death...i'm glad to see it's not just me. I actually couldn't control a mood swing and I'm a person that has always prided myself on keeping my cool. I said some horrible things to my husband.

I've been making life-styie changes-I've added yoga and trying to eat healthy and exercise more.

Yoga is clearly Satanic. She openly admits abusing her poor husband. This witch deserves to burn in Hell!

yes, i have had it that bad and nobody believed me. I finally came to realize that when i looked bad it was because it was one of those very BAD days. My hair was messy, my make up undone and i was not looking good at all. I would look in the mirror and say..."who is that?" I know the feeling my dear, it has been 10 years of hell!

She sounds like a schizo.... 10 years of Hell? Just wait till you REALLY go there, lady. Glory!

I have been peri-menopausal for a couple of years and continue to struggle with Dr. Jekyl & Mrs. Hyde. I have to admit that I constantly am in a bad mood and have become very pessimistic about life as a whole. And if I have a couple glasses of wine, I really become a monster.

Don't know how this all sounds to you, but to me it sounds like Demon possession and mental illness. I don't remember reading about any of this nonsense in the Bible. In fact, quite the opposite.

Here are just a few cases from the Bible where True Christian women were given children by God, even though they were real old, and some were barren.

~Abraham and Sarah had given up hope of ever having their own children when God gave Abraham the promise that he and Sarah would have a son whose offspring would be greater than the stars in the sky. Sarah laughed at the promise of God since she was well past the child-bearing years (she have birth at 90 years old, and lived to 127), but God fulfilled his promise with the birth of Isaac. (You can read more about the story in Genesis 16-21.)

~Isaac, the son of Abraham and Sarah, married Rebekah. The Scriptures tell us in Genesis 25:21 that Isaac pleaded to the Lord for his wife who was barren. It was 20 years after their marriage that the Lord blessed Isaac and Rebekah with twin sons, Jacob and Esau.

~Jacob married sisters Rachel and Leah. Leah had six sons and a daughter, but the Lord had closed Rachel's womb. Rachel tried everything she could think of to have children. Once in anguish, she cried out to Jacob, "Give me children, or else I die" (Genesis 30:1). Jacob in anger replied, "Am I in God's stead, who hath withheld from thee the fruit of the womb?" It wasn't until the Lord opened her womb that she bore Joseph and Benjamin. She died giving birth to Benjamin.

~The Scriptures do not tell us the name of Samson's mother, but she was childless until an angel appeared to the wife of Manoah promising a male child, a Nazarite, who would judge the children of Israel (Judges 13).

~Elkanah had two wives. His favorite wife Hannah was barren. Peninnah, the other wife, taunted Hannah since she had no children. Hannah pleaded with God to give her a son, promising to give him back to the Lord's work. God answered her prayer with the birth of Samuel, the last and greatest judge of Israel. (1 Samuel 1).

~2 Kings 4:8-17 relates the account of the Shunammite woman, whom the Bible calls the great woman. She was great in faith, wisdom, and silence. She opened her home to the prophet Elisha and made him his own little private chamber, a favorite place of retreat for him. Elisha wanted to repay the woman for her hospitality, but she made it clear that she was not seeking honor, recognition, or favors from him. Gehazi, Elisha's servant, told Elisha that the woman was barren and her husband was old. Elisha's promise that she would have a son when spring came around again was fulfilled.

~The Bible describes Elisabeth, the cousin of Mary who bore Jesus, as well-stricken in years and barren. She and her husband Zachariah had long already given up hope of ever bearing a child, when an angel appeared to Zachariah promising a son. That son was John the Baptist, the forerunner and greatest prophet who prepared the way for Jesus (See Luke 1 for the story.)

God opened all these wombs of these previously barren woman. In two instances the women were believed by all to be well beyond child bearing years, yet they bore sons of promise. From the evidence of God's Holy Word, and the fact that Sarah gave birth at 90 years old, it would seem that menopuase only effects women who mess with their hormones. ie. take pills to kill their unborn babies etc. These witches deserve all God gives them in return!

Praise!

[HTannor]

Re: Can True Christian™ Women get the Menopause?

Dear Rachel, I followed the link in your response and was taken to some medical advice web site where women were discussing the subject at great length but since it was not an approved LBC site, I quickly left it.

We have many highly intelligent, qualified, True Christian (tm) ladies here on the forum and I firmly believe they can certainly dispense solid Christian insight into your concerns.

In the future be very careful when you seek out for advice from non-LBC sources.

[James Hutchins]

Re: Can True Christian™ Women get the Menopause?

As many of you know, my wife is a good bit older than I. Because of her being an only child of a very rich industrialist, I had to sign a prenuptial. I claimed the idea was preposterous as money, even in the billions, was no match for my love. But unless I signed, I was not getting married. In any case, as I said, my wife is up in years and suffers men-O-pause. Some days, she confuses the iron for the phone. Fortunately, she has not made the same mistake yet with any of the handguns sprinkled liberally around the house. So to bluntly answer you, yes, a True Christian™ lady can suffer men-O-pause.

[Rachel_Pierce]

Re: Can True Christian™ Women get the Menopause?

As many of you know, my wife is a good bit older than I. Because of her being an only child of a very rich industrialist, I had to sign a prenuptial. I claimed the idea was preposterous as money, even in the billions, was no match for my love. But unless I signed, I was not getting married. In any case, as I said, my wife is up in years and suffers men-O-pause. Some days, she confuses the iron for the phone. Fortunately, she has not made the same mistake yet with any of the handguns sprinkled liberally around the house. So to bluntly answer you, yes, a True Christian™ lady can suffer men-O-pause.

That's awful, sir. I HAD hoped it only effected athiests, retards, joos, Cattylicks, feminists, dykes and folks who deserved it. I will pray for your Godly wife. Maybe God will take her menopause away, and give you a whole bunch of new little soldiers for Christ. It worked for Sarah, and she was 90 years old at the time. The Lord can do wonderful things. Amen!

[Nobar King]

Re: Can True Christian™ Women get the Menopause?

Just keep praying that your man doesn't suffer from Man-o-pause.

[Sungstra]

Re: Can True Christian™ Women get the Menopause?

Oh, Rachel, should that tragedy ever happen to you, you may as well do this:

My GOD she doesn't have to kill herself! You shouldn't put those thoughts into peoples hears.

Rachel, yes menopause does happen to pretty much all women and yes it's true, they do become infertile in the process but some women have an easier time then other womens. There are plenty of support groups out there you could join if you need emotional help.

[Rachel_Pierce]

Re: Can True Christian™ Women get the Menopause?

My GOD she doesn't have to kill herself! You shouldn't put those thoughts into peoples hears.

I don't think Godly Mr Tannor was encouraging me to suicide. I don't think you'd find ANY True Christian saying anything lik that... Well, unless you're a fatty. Then, they would pretty much encourage it as much as possible. It's what God wants. God wants all fat folks to take a knife to their own throats, and as God's favourite Church, we want everyone to follow God's instructions. Praise Jesus!

Rachel, yes menopause does happen to pretty much all women and yes it's true, they do become infertile in the process but some women have an easier time then other womens. There are plenty of support groups out there you could join if you need emotional help.

That's just horrible! I don't wanna grow hair on my face like some weird circus freak. Yuck! Sorry, i don't really know about all this stuff, as I grew up without a mother from a real young age, so I didn't have her to talk to about women's stuff. But the Lord must have had his reasons for taking her away from me. Also, my father always discouraged me from having any female friends, as all the girls from our neighborhood were trash. He told me i'd goto Hellfire and suffer in the flames of eternal torment if I ever mixed with garbage like that.

Tho' I did have one friend from church, Emily Gates, but she up and married a Jew, so I had to stop talkin to her. It's kinda hard when your daddy don't tell you things and you have to figure out stuff on your own. I remember when I got my first period, and I thought I had cooter-cancer or somethin. I didn't even know what it was for, as it was never covered in my home-schooling curriculum. Then, when I got raped, I really didn't know what was going on either. But at least in my heart of hearts I knew that God was lookin out for me, and doing what was best for me, and that was all I needed. My father was a great man. It can't have been easy raising two kids (me an my brother) all on his own.

Thank you for your concern.

[eliot mayfield]

Re: Can True Christian™ Women get the Menopause?

Indeed, Godly Mr Tannor, sir, but I have no doubt that will never happen to me. God will protect me from such sicknesses. In truth, I don't think I've EVER met a True Christian woman with a hairy face, and I'm sure it's something Satanic. Possibly Demons cause the Menopause by killing your unborn babies, and turning your hormones into a man's. This is something that makes sense, especially after reading THIS forum on the sickness.



Note: If you THINK you are possessed by Demons, you probably are.



Yoga is clearly Satanic. She openly admits abusing her poor husband. This witch deserves to burn in Hell!



She sounds like a schizo.... 10 years of Hell? Just wait till you REALLY go there, lady. Glory!



Don't know how this all sounds to you, but to me it sounds like Demon possession and mental illness. I don't remember reading about any of this nonsense in the Bible. In fact, quite the opposite.

Here are just a few cases from the Bible where True Christian women were given children by God, even though they were real old, and some were barren.

~Abraham and Sarah had given up hope of ever having their own children when God gave Abraham the promise that he and Sarah would have a son whose offspring would be greater than the stars in the sky. Sarah laughed at the promise of God since she was well past the child-bearing years (she have birth at 90 years old, and lived to 127), but God fulfilled his promise with the birth of Isaac. (You can read more about the story in Genesis 16-21.)

~Isaac, the son of Abraham and Sarah, married Rebekah. The Scriptures tell us in Genesis 25:21 that Isaac pleaded to the Lord for his wife who was barren. It was 20 years after their marriage that the Lord blessed Isaac and Rebekah with twin sons, Jacob and Esau.

~Jacob married sisters Rachel and Leah. Leah had six sons and a daughter, but the Lord had closed Rachel's womb. Rachel tried everything she could think of to have children. Once in anguish, she cried out to Jacob, "Give me children, or else I die" (Genesis 30:1). Jacob in anger replied, "Am I in God's stead, who hath withheld from thee the fruit of the womb?" It wasn't until the Lord opened her womb that she bore Joseph and Benjamin. She died giving birth to Benjamin.

~The Scriptures do not tell us the name of Samson's mother, but she was childless until an angel appeared to the wife of Manoah promising a male child, a Nazarite, who would judge the children of Israel (Judges 13).

~Elkanah had two wives. His favorite wife Hannah was barren. Peninnah, the other wife, taunted Hannah since she had no children. Hannah pleaded with God to give her a son, promising to give him back to the Lord's work. God answered her prayer with the birth of Samuel, the last and greatest judge of Israel. (1 Samuel 1).

~2 Kings 4:8-17 relates the account of the Shunammite woman, whom the Bible calls the great woman. She was great in faith, wisdom, and silence. She opened her home to the prophet Elisha and made him his own little private chamber, a favorite place of retreat for him. Elisha wanted to repay the woman for her hospitality, but she made it clear that she was not seeking honor, recognition, or favors from him. Gehazi, Elisha's servant, told Elisha that the woman was barren and her husband was old. Elisha's promise that she would have a son when spring came around again was fulfilled.

~The Bible describes Elisabeth, the cousin of Mary who bore Jesus, as well-stricken in years and barren. She and her husband Zachariah had long already given up hope of ever bearing a child, when an angel appeared to Zachariah promising a son. That son was John the Baptist, the forerunner and greatest prophet who prepared the way for Jesus (See Luke 1 for the story.)

God opened all these wombs of these previously barren woman. In two instances the women were believed by all to be well beyond child bearing years, yet they bore sons of promise. From the evidence of God's Holy Word, and the fact that Sarah gave birth at 90 years old, it would seem that menopuase only effects women who mess with their hormones. ie. take pills to kill their unborn babies etc. These witches deserve all God gives them in return!

Praise!

Indeed, you used the Bible and answered the question!
A very good job!

[Don Bozo el Guapo]

Re: Can True Christian™ Women get the Menopause?

Can True Christians suffer from this Menopause thing?

You betcha nina. Right here on this Holy forum we have one sad victom of the menopause/mad cow disease thing who has an incredible case of catipillar lip, I cant mention names because she has a tendency to put me in quarantine (4 times) when I bring the subject up. But in my heart I know her b-t-h fits are just another symtom of the mad cow disease so I have truly forgivin her. And if she were ever to end up in County Genreral in a vegitative coma I would cheerfully, nay with GLEE! rush to her bedside 3 times a week (more if needed) to wax her lip.Aint that lovin you M&Ms baby? (oops). P.S. Rachel, with a little duct tape your picture would look just like my prom date.

[John Scopes]

Re: Can True Christian™ Women get the Menopause?

You betcha nina. Right here on this Holy forum we have one sad victom of the menopause/mad cow disease thing who has an incredible case of catipillar lip, I cant mention names because she has a tendency to put me in quarantine (4 times) when I bring the subject up. But in my heart I know her b-t-h fits are just another symtom of the mad cow disease so I have truly forgivin her. And if she were ever to end up in County Genreral in a vegitative coma I would cheerfully, nay with GLEE! rush to her bedside 3 times a week (more if needed) to wax her lip.Aint that lovin you M&Ms baby? (oops). P.S. Rachel, with a little duct tape your picture would look just like my prom date.

Sir, before you head off to a place I cannot reach you I have a small request. You currently reside in a country that is of scientific interest. There has long been speculation about reproductive activities between the aboriginals, and North American bison there. Would you be able to supply a DNA sample from yourself and your current "wife" to my lab for analysis ?

[Don Bozo el Guapo]

Re: Can True Christian™ Women get the Menopause?

Sir, before you head off to a place I cannot reach you I have a small request. You currently reside in a country that is of scientific interest. There has long been speculation about reproductive activities between the aboriginals, and North American bison there. Would you be able to supply a DNA sample from yourself and your current "wife" to my lab for analysis ?

Get in line pervado my dirty boxers fetch big bucks on E-Bay

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Can True Christian™ Women get the Menopause?

Get in line pervado my dirty boxers fetch big bucks on E-Bay

Why, Don Bozo! What a surprise!

Are you still long-distance courting SUV?

[demascus]

Re: Can True Christian™ Women get the Menopause?

I just have to say that at first I didn't realize what this website was all about, but after taking time to read a lot of the posts in detail, I have to tell you guys that you are really, very, very funny. I was reading a post written regarding Christain women and menopause, made by "James Hutchins", at one point he says that his wife suffers from menopause and as a result, sometimes mistakes the iron for the phone, but fortunately, as of yet, she has not made the same mistake with one of the many guns sprinkled liberally around the house. ( he had to sign a prenupe and his wife is rich, and much older then he is ) I was on the floor!! Everytime I think about that comment, I lose it again!!!!! you guys should be writing for some show like Mad T.V. or something!!!! I would like to know the back story on this website!?