Best Song To Beat Kids To?

[Born Again Bob]

Dearest Friends,

When you have to smack your kids around for disobeying your commands (and hence, God's), to the tune of what music do you beat them? My dear wife has become pregnant, and I want to rough the kid up a little in utero just to show him who's boss. I was thinking a half-hour beating to salsa music, or some other precussion-heavy style, but your input would be warmly welcomed.

Yours in Him,
BAB

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Best Song To Beat Kids To?

Dearest Friends,

When you have to smack your kids around for disobeying your commands (and hence, God's), to the tune of what music do you beat them? My dear wife has become pregnant, and I want to rough the kid up a little in utero just to show him who's boss. I was thinking a half-hour beating to salsa music, or some other precussion-heavy style, but your input would be warmly welcomed.

Yours in Him,
BAB

Wel I don't have any children as of yet, but when I beat my 14 year old Indonesian houseboy, I like to have him put on some Tenessee Ernie Ford. My dad used to like that one to beat me by, so...

[loveis..]

Re: Best Song To Beat Kids To?

What the hell!!! beating the child before its born there is somethnig wrong with you people..

[Born Again Bob]

Re: Best Song To Beat Kids To?

What the hell!!! beating the child before its born there is somethnig wrong with you people..

Dear Friend,

Judge not, lest ye be judged...

Yours in Him,
bab

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Best Song To Beat Kids To?

Ramones: "Beat on the Brat"?

[Jack O'fagan]

Re: Best Song To Beat Kids To?

"Smack my bitch up" by the Prodigy has a good regular beat. I normally use it when beating my wife but it would work equally well with a small daughter.

YiC

Jack

[Jack O'fagan]

Re: Best Song To Beat Kids To?

I should have pointed out that The Prodigy are a British Christian rock group, you may not be aware of them in the US.

Jack

[PrinsesseAnja]

Re: Best Song To Beat Kids To?

Dearest Friends,

When you have to smack your kids around for disobeying your commands (and hence, God's), to the tune of what music do you beat them? My dear wife has become pregnant, and I want to rough the kid up a little in utero just to show him who's boss. I was thinking a half-hour beating to salsa music, or some other precussion-heavy style, but your input would be warmly welcomed.

Yours in Him,
BAB

Isn't it illegal to beat up your child?
Do you really think it is a good idea? Your child isn't born, and you already think about how you should beat the kid up?
And why do you need music?

[Born Again Bob]

Re: Best Song To Beat Kids To?

Dear Friend,

And why do you need music?

What kind of monster would I be to expose my unborn child to a cappella? If you listen carefully at the mouth of Hell you can always hear the damned singing Black Coffee in Bed.

Disgusted,
BAB

[PrinsesseLily]

Re: Best Song To Beat Kids To?

I'm thinking you might could use Billy Talent: River Below....

[Jedediah]

Re: Best Song To Beat Kids To?

If one of my sons gives me any back-sass or breaks one of God's Commandments, we go down to the basement and all five of them get the rod of correction. This encourages them to police each other. First they scourge each other with the rod, then once tears are streaming down all of their faces I have four of them take turns holding down the other while I lay into each and rebuke them with furious rebukes.

With five sons, this takes about just under twenty minutes from start to finish. Just enough time for Ravel's Bolero!

[PrinsesseLily]

Re: Best Song To Beat Kids To?

Isn't it illegal to beat up your child?
Do you really think it is a good idea? Your child isn't born, and you already think about how you should beat the kid up?
And why do you need music?

It might be but The bible says different
In here we listen to the word of The Lord

[PrinsesseAnja]

Re: Best Song To Beat Kids To?

Dear Friend,



What kind of monster would I be to expose my unborn child to a cappella? If you listen carefully at the mouth of Hell you can always hear the damned singing Black Coffee in Bed.

Disgusted,
BAB

So it's mean not to play music when you beat up your child?
But if you need some music you could use some gospel..

[Jack O'fagan]

Re: Best Song To Beat Kids To?

Quote. Isn't it illegal to beat up your child?
Do you really think it is a good idea? Your child isn't born, and you already think about how you should beat the kid up?
And why do you need music



You don't need music to beat a child but it easier to get a good rythmn going. Plus it is a fantastic aerobic exercise. My doctor has recommended it three times a week, so on Mondays ,Wednesdays and Fridays I am making a special effort to look out for any reason to rebuke them. I have lost a few pounds already.


YiC


Jack

[PrinsesseAnja]

Re: Best Song To Beat Kids To?

It might be but The bible says different
In here we listen to the word of The Lord

Yes, we do!