[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Book burning

But, those must have been worth ---

Never mind. I have lasagna in the oven...

Isabella, can you put a price on Salvation™?

Those items did nothing to edify the soul. Neither did their ultra-modern furniture, by the Eames brothers and Le Corbusier.

I have no doubt they will love their new (well, gently used) La-Z-Boy recliner sectional! MUCH more comfortable than those "sitting machines".

[Isabella Abbey]

Re: Book burning

That came from the Young household . . . along with books about evolution, like that first-edition Origin of Species, and those depraved Frida Kahlo paintings.

But, those must have been worth ---

Never mind. I have lasagna in the oven...

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Book burning

I'm so glad you enjoyed your visit! Have you given any thought to setting up shop here? I believe you met a number of our ladies who currently stay at the Edge of the Village tent city during their unclean time. It's really not an appropriate place for them, don't you agree?

I do have to ask, how exactly did this end up in a nice town like North Salem, anyway?

Sister, I was as shocked as you. New people move to town now and then, and they sometimes bring inappropriate things. That came from the Young household . . . along with books about evolution, like that first-edition Origin of Species, and those depraved Frida Kahlo paintings.

That decades-old oil paint sure went up in a blaze of glory, eh, Sister?

The Youngs were not very happy that we'd taken away their "artwork" and their books, but we restocked their shelves with things like the Left Behind series, Bibles, hymnals, etc., and put some nice Normal Rockwell prints up on the walls. Their house looks MUCH nicer now, and I'm sure they'll be thrilled with the change once they are released from the stocks.

Once they complete their period of adjustment, we should be able to return their children . . . presently in custody of the church.

[JennyD]

Re: Book burning

I did make it to Rev. Rodimer's book burning in North Salem yesterday night.

It was a grand event! There was so much Christian love in the air that I was able to set aside the terrifying memories of the Monthly Visitor being burned to the ground by a mob of angry liberals dressed just like the Landover security team.

But the burning was not only limited to books, no! There were toys, too!

I do have to ask, how exactly did this end up in a nice town like North Salem, anyway?

[David Goldman]

Re: Book burning

Ah. Mr. David. Are you a married man??

Well, due to circumstances beyond my control, I do happen to be unmarried at the moment and taking a Romans 7 vow of chastity. However, should the Holy Spirit send a Proverbs 31 women into my life, I would seek His guidance in reevaluating the situation.

[Isabella Abbey]

Re: Book burning

a Grand Marnier souffle avec Creme Anglaise flavored with a dash of vanilla and a spinkle of cinnamon.
.

Ah. Mr. David. Are you a married man??

[David Goldman]

Re: Book burning

Twain articulated well for the silent majority, there's no doubt about that; I wonder if he's being singled out a bit arbitrarily, though, for censorship. Twain's novels and his essays capture Victorian America so brilliantly.

It is not arbitrary at all -- in fact it is quite the contrary. It is precisely for those very reasons that he is censored. He mixes something grand like America's golden age, and adds just a few drops of poison in it (like someone else I know). Few people would drink a bottle of arsenic, but you can get them to take a few drops if it is hidden in a Grand Marnier souffle avec Creme Anglaise flavored with a dash of vanilla and a spinkle of cinnamon.

Mr. David, thank you for your kind concern. I had some tuna on crackers with Camembert for lunch yesterday. Breakfast this morning was french toast, a poached egg, and bananas and strawberries in yogurt with some maple syrup. I love Sundays.

Well, that's better than tofu, I'll grant you that. But not quite the ground beef/cheese/pork sausage omelet that gives you that morning protein rush to get out there and confront the heathens.

[Isabella Abbey]

Re: Book burning

From a purely literary side, Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn promote and glorify juvenile delinquency.

Regarding the author, Twain (as Samuel Clemens) was quoted as saying "Faith is believing what you know ain't so", and "If Christ were here now there is one thing he would not be -- a Christian". Clearly the man is being provocative for its own sake and without adding anything of Christian value.

On a side note, you need to mix in some more animal products for your diet. I think that might be part of why you can't break your liberal affliction.

Twain articulated well for the silent majority, there's no doubt about that; I wonder if he's being singled out a bit arbitrarily, though, for censorship. Twain's novels and his essays capture Victorian America so brilliantly.

Mr. David, thank you for your kind concern. I had some tuna on crackers with Camembert for lunch yesterday. Breakfast this morning was french toast, a poached egg, and bananas and strawberries in yogurt with some maple syrup. I love Sundays.

[apple9]

Re: Book burning

[QUOTE=Rev. M. Rodimer;390120]For that, I might travel to Europistan.

/QUOTE]aww that hurt my fellings.

[Johnnyboy]

Re: Book burning

Ah... I knew this once, but I've forgotten -- would someone remind me, please, why Twain is on the censor list? I've got Huck right here, and I'm not seeing the immediate threat to young Baptist bambini...

By the way. I had the best cold pasta salad I've ever had last night. Ziti with olive oil mayonnaise, mixed in with lots -- and I mean handfuls -- of torn mint leaves, cilantro, and basil. So simple, and sooo good....

In "Tom Sawyer", Twain makes a mockery of children studying Bible verses. He also encourages cheating when Tom manages to win the Bible contest without actually ever reading any scripture. There are also several referances to sorcery and witchcraft in the book. Pagen cures for warts, incantations to ward off evil spirits, and blood oaths to mention a few. As far as I'm concerned, that Rowling wench has made millions of dollars from plagerising Twain. He can collect his royalties when she joins him in Hell.

[Dr. Warren Wierdsbe]

Re: Book burning

Ah... I knew this once, but I've forgotten -- would someone remind me, please, why Twain is on the censor list? I've got Huck right here, and I'm not seeing the immediate threat to young Baptist bambini...

By the way. I had the best cold pasta salad I've ever had last night. Ziti with olive oil mayonnaise, mixed in with lots -- and I mean handfuls -- of torn mint leaves, cilantro, and basil. So simple, and sooo good....

Not only does Huckleberry Finn promote juvenile delinquency, it also elevates the nigra to some kind of noble beast. Teaches them to be uppity.

In Christ,
Warren

[David Goldman]

Re: Book burning

Ah... I knew this once, but I've forgotten -- would someone remind me, please, why Twain is on the censor list? I've got Huck right here, and I'm not seeing the immediate threat to young Baptist bambini...

By the way. I had the best cold pasta salad I've ever had last night. Ziti with olive oil mayonnaise, mixed in with lots -- and I mean handfuls -- of torn mint leaves, cilantro, and basil. So simple, and sooo good....

From a purely literary side, Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn promote and glorify juvenile delinquency.

Regarding the author, Twain (as Samuel Clemens) was quoted as saying "Faith is believing what you know ain't so", and "If Christ were here now there is one thing he would not be -- a Christian". Clearly the man is being provocative for its own sake and without adding anything of Christian value.

On a side note, you need to mix in some more animal products for your diet. I think that might be part of why you can't break your liberal affliction.

[Isabella Abbey]

Re: Book burning

I am proud to say that I have never read any of that trash, nor the Witchcraft and Demonism promotion known as the Harry Potter books. I've always waited for a word from my pastor before reading anything.

In Christ
Warren

Ah... I knew this once, but I've forgotten -- would someone remind me, please, why Twain is on the censor list? I've got Huck right here, and I'm not seeing the immediate threat to young Baptist bambini...

By the way. I had the best cold pasta salad I've ever had last night. Ziti with olive oil mayonnaise, mixed in with lots -- and I mean handfuls -- of torn mint leaves, cilantro, and basil. So simple, and sooo good....

[Dr. Warren Wierdsbe]

Re: Book burning

I'll have to see if one of the Landover Deacons can supply me with the complete list of banned books. Here are a bunch that I know of (other than your list, which are all on Landover's list, too). All make excellent roasting material:

D. Dennett, Breaking the Spell
D. Dennett, Darwin's Dangerous Idea
D. Dennett, Freedom Evolves
R. Dawkins, The Selfish Gene
R. Dawkins, The Ancestor's Tale
R. Dawkins, Climbing Mount Improbable
R. Dawkins, Unweaving the Rainbow
R. Dawkins, The Blind Watchmaker
R. Dawkins, The Extended Phenotype
R. Dawkins, The Greatest Show on Earth
C. Hitchens, God is Not Great
C. Hitchens, The Portable Atheist
C. Hitchens, Is Christianity Good For the World?
S. Pinker, The Blank Slate
S. Harris, Letter To A Christian Nation
S. Harris, The End of Faith
Twain, Huckleberry Finn
Salinger, Catcher in the Rye
Darwin, The Origin of Species
Darwin, The Descent of Man
T. Paine, Rights of Man
D. Buss, The Evolution of Desire
D. Buss, Evolutionary Psychology

Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES should anyone read any of these books.

Note that Hitchens did write a couple of good books, No One Left To Lie To and The Missionary Position. Everyone should read those.

I am proud to say that I have never read any of that trash, nor the Witchcraft and Demonism promotion known as the Harry Potter books. I've always waited for a word from my pastor before reading anything.

In Christ
Warren

[David Goldman]

Re: Book burning

Hello, Mr. Now. Do you have some of these books? Would it be OK if, instead of seeing them incinerated, I pick them up and donate them to a rural library?

Why? Is the rural library out of firewood?