[SUV]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

They're everywhere - they're everywhere!!!

Someone should tell them that it's all really just.......macaroni.

Perhaps our very own "Pasta" Al is one?

No - I cannot Conceive the thought

[Nobar King]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

I'm having trouble just stomaching this kind of discussion. This is obviously just baloney. Can we get back to discussing some more meaty issues, like why the Pope doesn't eat Spaghetti?

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

Our creator is not a meal but we honor our creator with a meal in his image

You certainly know how to dish it out Jo, don't you?

Listen, the fact that you unbelievers worship a pile of limp, pale tallywacker like noodles shows what your religion is really about! Homosexuality! Any god who would promise strippers and eternal lap dances is just creating an army of gays.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

Pope Noodle the XIIIth

If God would be a meal, He would be the most awesome Potroast you ever tasted. God would surely never take the form of flacid and tasteless eyetalian junk.

Of course, God would never want to be a meal. He could if He would, but He won't. His words are our food, our starters, our main dish, our desert; and He doesn't make you fat. Only Saved!®.

Our creator is not a meal but we honor our creator with a meal in his image

[Nobar King]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

Isn't farfalle the gayest of all pasta? Look at those silly bow ties.

[Wide-Open]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

I'm pretty sure that guy's their pope.

Pope Noodle the XIIIth

If God would be a meal, He would be the most awesome Potroast you ever tasted. God would surely never take the form of flacid and tasteless eyetalian junk.

Of course, God would never want to be a meal. He could if He would, but He won't. His words are our food, our starters, our main dish, our desert; and He doesn't make you fat. Only Saved!(R).

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

Of course they exist! M't:6:19: Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal:Gold is resistant to moth and rust, Bobby-Joe and the security detail detain anyone who might look like a thief and thus Gold taps are an economic saving - I am a True Christian, I can only afford the best!

I thought you Christians were all about self sacrifice for the good of others not lining your own nest, but looking at the gold taps and the church of Rome I will admit I could be wrong on that point

Oh here we see the way you SM'ers see the world as divided rather than as united. God made us high and lowly and ordered our estate! We are united in the belief that all is for the best.

Oh we see the world untied in the truth of out creation by The Great Noodle

You'll find none of that commie rubbish in the Bible!

So to be selfless is a commie aspiration is it, in that case hand me the Red Flag

Of course! He likes to do something for the idiots of the world as well - see it as equal opportunity with the balance on the side of the less well endowed.

Does not sound like equal opportunity to me sounds like an attempt to control those who you will not allow to think for themselves

How could anyone be "unwanted"? That sounds like your SM is the very sort of god that would have thousands killed.

How can you equate the prevention of an unwanted child with killing? If our creator deems that a child should be created then it will.

It is the work of the devil.

The devil is a mythical creation to frighten those who do not agree with your point of view

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

I'm pretty sure that guy's their pope.

[Wide-Open]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

While we are on the subject, I urge all Landover parents not to feed their children Chef Boyardee. Not only is it too spicy for sensible Christian taste buds, it's a gateway food to all sorts of unsavory Italian fare, like calzones and enormous sausages.

Amen Brother. I remember my unsaved days as if it was yesterday. I'm sure you all remember the kind of vile stuff my (late) wife made me eat, trying to turn me into a giggling sissified limp whristed lisping homer.

I'm now thinking she may actually have been one of these "pastafarians".

Does this look "godly" to you?

[ATTACH]8598[/ATTACH]

Just say no Brothers and Sisters!

[Old Man Hatchet]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

While we are on the subject, I urge all Landover parents not to feed their children Chef Boyardee. Not only is it too spicy for sensible Christian taste buds, it's a gateway food to all sorts of unsavory Italian fare, like calzones and enormous sausages.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

"I'm afraid this is going to be harder that I thought. We probably should have grabbed an easier target like Kim Jong Il and put him in GITMO immediately; but since we have this demon engaged in conversation, GOD won't fail us."

This is because I have truth on my side

What does truth have to do with religion?

"Listen to me boy. Al of those "I wish" things sound really gay. Of course men know Teal from Fuchsia! Teal is a light ale and Fuschia is a dark German brew. All of those other rules are more or less exactly contrary to Scripture. Women are property. You buy and sell them. Of course we Christians don't oppress anyone. We may have to kill a few witches or unbelievers, but it's not murder if GOD tells you to do it"

This clearly shows your do NOT know Teal from Fuchsia and that your scriptures do not reflect truth but some kind of misogynist fantasy

Of course I do. I just described the difference to you. One comes in sort of a pansy-blue bottle and one comes in a pansy-purple bottle. Real men don't drink them.

"WE ARE COMMANDED to judge everyone and everything. I am not going to start quoting Scripture to you yet. I don't think you have been [s]tortured into submission [s/] convinced by the Bible's irrefutable logic just yet. But at any time feel free to challenge me or ANY PASTOR HERE to show you the appropriate passage in the KJV1611 (Authorized) Bible which GOD caused to be written for His new Church of Landover. We were given leave to bring His word to the new country and slaughter all of the injuns who had pre-stolen our land and we still have several hundred scalps and war trophies in the Landover Natural History of Creation museum."

It is not our role to judge, that is the role of our creator, how dare you persume you have that right

Well, you asked for it.

Leviticus 19:15
In righteousness shalt thou judge thy neighbour.

John 7:24
Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment.

1 Corinthians 2:15
But he that is spiritual judgeth all things, yet he himself is judged of no man.

1 Corinthians 5:12-13
For what have I to do to judge them also that are without? do not ye judge them that are within? But them that are without God judgeth. Therefore put away from among yourselves that wicked person.

1 Corinthians 6:2-3
Do ye not know that the saints shall judge the world? and if the world shall be judged by you, are ye unworthy to judge the smallest matters? Know ye not that we shall judge angels? how much more things that pertain to this life?
"Our primary mission is to 'perfect' JOOS according to Ann Coulter and then move on and become prepared for the day of reckoning when JESUS returns to start Armageddon and make the rivers flow with blood in His mercy."

you really think out creator hate his creation that much?


Just the sinners who aren't members of Landover and have their tithes in order.

REVELATION

Jesus makes war. 19:11

Jesus's clothes are dipped in blood and his secret name ("that no man knew") is "The Word of God". 19:13

With eyes aflame, many crowns on his head, clothes dripping with blood, a sword sticking out of his mouth, and a secret name, Jesus leads the faithful in heaven into holy war on earth. 19:14-15

"Come ... unto the supper of the great God." An angel calls all the fowls to feast upon the flesh of dead horses and human bodies, "both free and bond, both small and great." 19:17-18

The beast and the false prophet are cast alive into a lake of fire. The rest were killed with the sword of Jesus. "And all the fowls were filled with their flesh." 19:20-21

God will send fire from heaven to devour people. And the devil will be tormented "day and night for ever and ever." 20:9-10

Whoever isn't found listed in the book of life will be cast into the lake of fire. 20:15

All liars, as well as those who are fearful or unbelieving, will be cast into "the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone." 21:8

"You have only a short period of time to decide. Will you be Saved or soup?

We are willing to work with you. We successfully converted the Jerry Jones cult within an hour. Sadly, most of them are in HELL gulping lava with SATAN's huge, spiked member slapping at their backsides for eternity....but we did manage to arrange the meeting.

I appeal to you, son. Don't try to think for yourself. Jesus hates that. Begin your tithing program of 20% a month and we can start on your eternal life! "

The Flying Spaghetti Monster gave us a brian and wants us to use it, your Myth seems to see the use of reason and thinking as evil

There is not ONE verse in the Bible that suggests anyone should think for themselves. On the contrary, GOD thinks and then tells us, His Pastors what to think and we in turn tell His flock what to think. That seems to me like perfection!

RAmen

I believe it is only fair to tell you that GOD IS NOT MOCKED!

[Talitha]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

Italian food always gives me wind.
Now I know it will also send me to Hell if I eat any more

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

So those Gold Bath taps don't exist?

Of course they exist! M't:6:19: Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal:Gold is resistant to moth and rust, Bobby-Joe and the security detail detain anyone who might look like a thief and thus Gold taps are an economic saving - I am a True Christian, I can only afford the best!

Re - you’re not much of a Christian are you?"

Very true I am no sort of Christian, you use your myth to keep down the less fortunate,

Oh here we see the way you SM'ers see the world as divided rather than as united. God made us high and lowly and ordered our estate! We are united in the belief that all is for the best.

the true joy of creation tells us to improve the lot of our fellow man.

You'll find none of that commie rubbish in the Bible!

Re: - "Jesus likes simple people too! They seem to accept His message far easier than those who are arrogantly intelligent."

So you admit your Myth appeals to the hard of thinking?

Of course! He likes to do something for the idiots of the world as well - see it as equal opportunity with the balance on the side of the less well endowed.

re:"You have just undone all your good words"

Why because the creator want us to be safe and not to populate his world with the unwanted?

How could anyone be "unwanted"? That sounds like your SM is the very sort of god that would have thousands killed.

Re -"It is death to unborn potential souls!"

If your mythical God was so strong would a thin bit of rubber really get in the way of the life he wanted to create?

It is the work of the devil.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

"I'm afraid this is going to be harder that I thought. We probably should have grabbed an easier target like Kim Jong Il and put him in GITMO immediately; but since we have this demon engaged in conversation, GOD won't fail us."

This is because I have truth on my side

"Listen to me boy. Al of those "I wish" things sound really gay. Of course men know Teal from Fuchsia! Teal is a light ale and Fuschia is a dark German brew. All of those other rules are more or less exactly contrary to Scripture. Women are property. You buy and sell them. Of course we Christians don't oppress anyone. We may have to kill a few witches or unbelievers, but it's not murder if GOD tells you to do it"

This clearly shows your do NOT know Teal from Fuchsia and that your scriptures do not reflect truth but some kind of misogynist fantasy

"WE ARE COMMANDED to judge everyone and everything. I am not going to start quoting Scripture to you yet. I don't think you have been [s]tortured into submission [s/] convinced by the Bible's irrefutable logic just yet. But at any time feel free to challenge me or ANY PASTOR HERE to show you the appropriate passage in the KJV1611 (Authorized) Bible which GOD caused to be written for His new Church of Landover. We were given leave to bring His word to the new country and slaughter all of the injuns who had pre-stolen our land and we still have several hundred scalps and war trophies in the Landover Natural History of Creation museum."

It is not our role to judge, that is the role of our creator, how dare you persume you have that right

"Our primary mission is to 'perfect' JOOS according to Ann Coulter and then move on and become prepared for the day of reckoning when JESUS returns to start Armageddon and make the rivers flow with blood in His mercy."

you really think out creator hate his creation that much?

"You have only a short period of time to decide. Will you be Saved or soup?

We are willing to work with you. We successfully converted the Jerry Jones cult within an hour. Sadly, most of them are in HELL gulping lava with SATAN's huge, spiked member slapping at their backsides for eternity....but we did manage to arrange the meeting.

I appeal to you, son. Don't try to think for yourself. Jesus hates that. Begin your tithing program of 20% a month and we can start on your eternal life!"

The Flying Spaghetti Monster gave us a brian and wants us to use it, your Myth seems to see the use of reason and thinking as evil


RAmen

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Evils of the Noodly Appendage!

"You just made them up - if you think something can be made with Godly authority merely by writing it down, you are deluded."

Yeh like some old git coming down from having a kip up a hill is more valid then the truth of a true prophet such as Mosey the Pirate captain who was given the The Eight "I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts" while brooding atop Mount Salsa

"So basically, the SM has no self-respect?"

No The FSM as confident in his place in the universe and is not riddled with doubt

"Not much of a god are you? God must be able to show the magnificence of His creation and His awesome power over it – fat lot a god is if he can do little more than your neighbor."

The true creator has respect for his creation, do you feel so insicure that you feel that the creator must hate you?

"God gave us eyes that we might see the good and evil of the world. We would never have discovered such things as pi=3 if we had, all the time, been mistaking rattle snakes for bits of string. Judgment is there to be used."

Pi is approximately 3.14159265358979323846 your acceptance as it being 3 shows your lack of understanding of creation

"-and here lies the faulty with your theology - God has given us a set of guidelines, your idiot god says, -I’ll leave all decisions to your subjective powers.-"

The FSM gave you a brain if you are not capable of using it that is not his fault.

"Ah, I see some common ground emerging - God too knows how wrong it is not to distinguish between the races, treat women as if they ran the place and not eat pounds of Godly fat from sacrificial lambs!"

One point of convergence...

"You can be assured that Landover will never spend a penny on SM."

So those Gold Bath taps don't exist?

"Jesus said the poor are always with us - to end poverty would be to deny Him! Disease is Divine retribution to restrict God is blasphemy. Jesus commands us to slay those who will not accept Him as their leader - you’re not much of a Christian are you?"

Very true I am no sort of Christian, you use your myth to keep down the less fortunate, the true joy of creation tells us to improve the lot of our fellow man.

"Jesus likes simple people too! They seem to accept His message far easier than those who are arrogantly intelligent."

So you admit your Myth appeals to the hard of thinking?

"Don’t worry, you’ve not said anything worth repeating yet."

But you claim your fictional deity talks to you?

"Good to see you take a Godly line on Sex, Homerism, etc! The Lord Aapproves! "

We do not seek the approval of your mythical lord

"You have just undone all your good words"

Why because the creator want us to be safe and not to populate his world with the unwanted?

"It is death to unborn potential souls!"

If your mythical God was so strong would a thin bit of rubber really get in the way of the life he wanted to create?