[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: Hello from bonny Scotland!

1) That will never happen.
2) Even if by some weird twist of reality it did happen, you'd have the little problem of me being quite far away from you at the moment. *snicker*
3) I'd start worrying about that whole fire fixation if I were you. *snicker*

1) Just wait until President Hargrove is sworn in. Your time is nearing its end.
2) Once our current Godly President's surge has done its work and tamed the mooslims of Iraq, the troops will then be free to hunt down heathens around the world.
3) It's not my fixation, it's God's and would He ever have a surprise for you if you weren't already amply warned.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Hello from bonny Scotland!

Van Hellhound, once God's law has settled on this land, I will be the first to volunteer to strike the match that will send you down to your Hellish master.

1) That will never happen.
2) Even if by some weird twist of reality it did happen, you'd have the little problem of me being quite far away from you at the moment. *snicker*
3) I'd start worrying about that whole fire fixation if I were you. *snicker*

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: Hello from bonny Scotland!

Why should LP books be burned?

I mistyped, and by the time God allowed me to notice it, it was too late to go back and edit. I apologize.

[Poetic Peter]

Re: Hello from bonny Scotland!

Not only would it be wise, it is highly recommended to burn any book that isn't the King James Bible or any book printed by Landover Publishing.

Why should LP books be burned?

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: Hello from bonny Scotland!

Van Hellhound, once God's law has settled on this land, I will be the first to volunteer to strike the match that will send you down to your Hellish master.

[WilliamJenningsBryan]

Re: Hello from bonny Scotland!

I almost slipped and crossed myself like the papist I used to be! (Praise Jesus for staying my hand.) I guess it must make it easier for them to defile themselves with each other and with any wandering sheep. Disgusting.

You suspicions are correct Sister Maria. Kilts were invented when it was determined that sheep can hear a zipper up to a mile away.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Hello from bonny Scotland!

KJV1611, NIV, Catholic etc bible versions, Koran, hey, it's ALL good put to such use.

I bet I could make a tidy sum making extra soft biblical TP with soothing aloe vera, extra gentle on 'roids, for those who suffer them.
Of course, I'd have to find someone to produce it that wasn't xtian. Or better yet, get my own damn factory.

[OnYourKnees]

Re: Hello from bonny Scotland!

Bah. There's nothing quite like the taste of bible-roasted marshmallows.
And it isn't as though there would be none left over when I'm done...it seems the damn things are manufactued almost as much as toilet paper.....which reminds me.....I should get some of those bibles with the softer pages too.

I hear well-used New Infidel Version Bibles are extra-soft. And quilted.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Hello from bonny Scotland!

I believe the koran comes in two-ply these days.

V

Two-ply, eh? Most intriguing. I wouldn't mind a bit of variety here and there. No reason I can't use both.

[Brother V]

Re: Hello from bonny Scotland!

Bah. There's nothing quite like the taste of bible-roasted marshmallows.
And it isn't as though there would be none left over when I'm done...it seems the damn things are manufactued almost as much as toilet paper.....which reminds me.....I should get some of those bibles with the softer pages too.

I believe the koran comes in two-ply these days.

V

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Hello from bonny Scotland!

Bah. There's nothing quite like the taste of bible-roasted marshmallows.
And it isn't as though there would be none left over when I'm done...it seems the damn things are manufactued almost as much as toilet paper.....which reminds me.....I should get some of those bibles with the softer pages too.

[SalvationSeeker]

Re: Hello from bonny Scotland!

Bite me.
And leave the books alone, you shouldn't be burning those.....hmm.....that reminds me.....I need to order a fresh supply of bibles for next winter.

It is evil of you to destroy Bibles!
(But only if they're KJV1611's, otherwise, go right ahead!)
God is going to destroy you for despising His infallible word.

Whoso despiseth the word shall be destroyed:
But he that feareth the commandment shall be rewarded.
Proverbs 13:13

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Hello from bonny Scotland!

UnGodly books are also a great heat source on a chilly day, as they burn with the very fires of Hell enclosed within their pages! (So do witches. I see you lurking there, Van Hellspawn. )

Bite me.
And leave the books alone, you shouldn't be burning those.....hmm.....that reminds me.....I need to order a fresh supply of bibles for next winter.

[Kay Dee]

Re: Hello from bonny Scotland!

Thank you for your kind guidance I shall throw these publications to the fire straight away

[OnYourKnees]

Re: Hello from bonny Scotland!

Not only would it be wise, it is highly recommended to burn any book that isn't the King James Bible or any book printed by Landover Publishing.

UnGodly books are also a great heat source on a chilly day, as they burn with the very fires of Hell enclosed within their pages! (So do witches. I see you lurking there, Van Hellspawn. )