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  • Billy Haywood
    Confirmed Enemy of God
    BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
    • May 2007
    • 1

    #1

    Howdy yall!

    Hi.

    My name is Billy Haywood. I grew up on a farm on the outskirts of Topeka, Kansas. I am 22 years old and I currently study agricultural and engineering sciences at Missouri.

    Back home I studied bible with my pa, brother Jim, aunt Melody and my neighbor Rick. We read the bible every sunday. My hobbies are guitar, football, and worship. I drive a 1988 Chevrolet and her name's Sheryl. I've had her since I was barely old enough to drive.

    I joined yall cause I felt like I needed a community. Its mighty lonely out here in the city where I live. I live in a dorm, just me and my roommate Aazim so I like to use the internet a lot.

    Good to meet all of yall!

    Billy.
  • nikilds
    True Christian™
    True Christian™
    • May 2007
    • 164

    #2
    Re: Howdy yall!

    I love Southerners!
    Be careful living with the same sex dormmate. Make sure he doesnt like you in that way.

    And please be careful when you ride Sheryl the next time.

    Peace be with you brother!
    Premarital sex is only a roadblock to holiness. You don't need to touch another person's body–or your own–to have a rockin' good time!
    Abstinence: it's not easy but neither are you!

    Comment

    • Pastor Ezekiel
      Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
       
      • Sep 2006
      • 78555

      #3
      Re: Howdy yall!

      Originally posted by Billy Haywood View Post
      Hi.

      My name is Billy Haywood. I grew up on a farm on the outskirts of Topeka, Kansas. I am 22 years old and I currently study agricultural and engineering sciences at Missouri.

      Back home I studied bible with my pa, brother Jim, aunt Melody and my neighbor Rick. We read the bible every sunday. My hobbies are guitar, football, and worship. I drive a 1988 Chevrolet and her name's Sheryl. I've had her since I was barely old enough to drive.

      I joined yall cause I felt like I needed a community. Its mighty lonely out here in the city where I live. I live in a dorm, just me and my roommate Aazim so I like to use the internet a lot.

      Good to meet all of yall!

      Billy.
      Welcome to God's favorite forum, Billy. I hope you will take the time to read through these pages and learn about our Divine mission. I also hope that you will take the time to use proper capitalization. While words like "Chevy" should certainly be capitalized, wouldn't you say that words like "Bible" and "Sunday" deserve the same respect?

      I'm curious about what version of the Holy Bible you use there, Billy. I'm also wondering why you have a freedom-hating mudslime terrorist for a room mate. Is he your servant perhaps?
      Who Will Jesus Damn?

      Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

      Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

      Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

      Comment

      • Aethereal
        Sad young man seduced into witchcraft.
        Aka as Daniel, etc.
         
        • May 2007
        • 51

        #4
        Re: Howdy yall!

        Hello Billy. My real name is Dillard H. Jones, but everyone calls me Danny around here. It's good to see that there are still good Christian people out there who will get together on Sunday, outside of church, to read the all-time best-seller in the known universe, the Bible. You'd do good to start out with a generous tithe to God's favourite church. It'll sure make Jesus happy. Oh, and no less than 10%, as Jesus commanded. Tell me Billy, what is your favourite Bible verse? Do you attend your local Southern Baptist church regularly? Even though you are new here I could certainly look up to you for Godly advice. Again, welcome.

        Comment

        • Pastor Ezekiel
          Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
           
          • Sep 2006
          • 78555

          #5
          Re: Howdy yall!

          Originally posted by Aethereal View Post
          Hello Billy. My real name is Dillard H. Jones, but everyone calls me Danny around here. It's good to see that there are still good Christian people out there who will get together on Sunday, outside of church, to read the all-time best-seller in the known universe, the Bible. You'd do good to start out with a generous tithe to God's favourite church. It'll sure make Jesus happy. Oh, and no less than 10%, as Jesus commanded. Tell me Billy, what is your favourite Bible verse? Do you attend your local Southern Baptist church regularly? Even though you are new here I could certainly look up to you for Godly advice. Again, welcome.
          Dannyboy, you are on the right track, but you are also so lost that it makes me concerned for you.

          First off, we are NOT Southern Baptists. Those people are nutjobs. Can you believe it; they even passed a bylaw condemning wine, which was Jesus' favorite beverage! Landover Baptist broke off with those pansies years ago. We are the only True Christian™ Church that follows the Holy KJV Bible literally, word for word.

          Which brings me to another point, Dannyboy. I don't know which false Bible you got that verse out of that's in your signature, but I know for certain it didn't come from the one true Bible, the KJV1611 version. Here's what your signature SHOULD say:

          Exodus 22:18
          Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live.


          For some reason you got the Deuteronomy verse right. Maybe the false Christians who butchered the heretical copy of the Bible that you have forgot to alter that one...

          Son, better get right with Jesus and quick. If He killed you today you'd find yourself in a world of hurt. I'd sure hate to see you doggy-paddling in a lake of fire for blasphemy.
          Who Will Jesus Damn?

          Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

          Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

          Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

          Comment

          • Aethereal
            Sad young man seduced into witchcraft.
            Aka as Daniel, etc.
             
            • May 2007
            • 51

            #6
            Re: Howdy yall!

            Sorry for the mistake about being Southern Baptist. I am sure I saw Betty Bowers saying in an interview that all True Christians were Southern Baptist. Although that interview was probably before the split. It's best not to think upon such things.
            I had no idea about the Southern Baptists condemning wine! Abomination! The one true Bible has this to say:

            Proverbs 31:6- "Give strong drink unto him that is ready to perish, and wine unto those that be of heavy hearts."

            Who could think of condemning wine? They're going directly against what the Bible says! They'll get what they deserve when Jesus drowns them face-first in the lake of fire, over and over, with continuing nuance of pain. They better get right with Jesus before he drop-kicks them into hell!

            Comment

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