[BelieverInGod]

Re: Donate a cock sock, help save local farmers

Dear Christians,


Since I’m quite good at this kind of house work I would be more than happy to help them poor cocks

However, every time I try to search the Internet for information about this important subject the computer just displays this rather strange error message from something called “Family Filter 1,3”


Where did you Christian ladies find the knitting patterns for those fine cock socks?

I came up with some weird results as well. Some long tubular things that didn't look like they'd fit any cock I've ever seen. So I did an image search and then went to the sites from there.

[Michelle1991]

Re: Donate a cock sock, help save local farmers

Dear Christians,


Since I’m quite good at this kind of house work I would be more than happy to help them poor cocks

However, every time I try to search the Internet for information about this important subject the computer just displays this rather strange error message from something called “Family Filter 1,3”


Where did you Christian ladies find the knitting patterns for those fine cock socks?

[Sister Charli]

Re: Donate a cock sock, help save local farmers

Those hairless cocks would be nice though. They are pre-plucked. All you would have to do is chop it's head off.

I think there may be a market for hairless cocks.
Sure saves you from getting fluff and stuff caught in your teeth.

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: Donate a cock sock, help save local farmers

Let me see if I get this, you ladies are going to make coats and sweaters for cocks. If I where the farmer I would keep my cock in the hen house, where its warm and moist. You can not leave your cock out side in the winter even with a coat. The cold dry air can be quite harmful.

It seems feathers are also a protection against illness. Not only are they susceptible to Avian flu but also skin infections including one that can be passed onto humans and is considered one of the sexually transmitted diseases, scabies. That said, ladies if you are out and measuring up a few strange cocks for protection, please remember to wash your hands between handling these sickly pluckers, to protect yourself.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Donate a cock sock, help save local farmers

HERE's a nice big red one.

[Petal]

Re: Donate a cock sock, help save local farmers

them cocks look so cute in thier socks! but i be thinkin that maybee they needs some pants to? cuz we not wants the cocks to look like donald ducks, he be a perverts wiv no pants on

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Donate a cock sock, help save local farmers

Yes the cock spends the majority of it's time in the hen house, but it can't stay in there all the time. The gasses that get trapped in there can be deadly and the cock needs some time to dry out or its skin will start to rot.

That's an excellent point.

I remember running across more than one pruny, peeling cock that hadn't been adequately aired out. Not only did they look appalling, but the smell was disgusting!

[BelieverInGod]

Re: Donate a cock sock, help save local farmers

Let me see if I get this, you ladies are going to make coats and sweaters for cocks. If I where the farmer I would keep my cock in the hen house, where its warm and moist. You can not leave your cock out side in the winter even with a coat. The cold dry air can be quite harmful.

Yes the cock spends the majority of it's time in the hen house, but it can't stay in there all the time. The gasses that get trapped in there can be deadly and the cock needs some time to dry out or its skin will start to rot.

[James Dewitt]

Re: Donate a cock sock, help save local farmers

Let me see if I get this, you ladies are going to make coats and sweaters for cocks. If I where the farmer I would keep my cock in the hen house, where its warm and moist. You can not leave your cock out side in the winter even with a coat. The cold dry air can be quite harmful.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Donate a cock sock, help save local farmers

Those hairless cocks would be nice though. They are pre-plucked. All you would have to do is chop it's head off.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: Donate a cock sock, help save local farmers

Those hairless cocks would be nice though. They are pre-plucked. All you would have to do is chop it's head off.

[BelieverInGod]

Re: Donate a cock sock, help save local farmers

I would like to give a hand to keep those cocks warm. Are American cocks any different to Aussie cocks. I did get to see different cocks when I went on missions with my father and noticed some countries have smaller cocks, especially in Asia.

I think American cocks are about the same size as Austrailian cocks considering they both basically have British roots.

I found a pattern online from England. It says it will fit a standard layer, so I'm hoping they will fit.

Materials


Double knitting yarn (100g makes approximately 3 jumpers)
2 buttons or 10cm Velcro
1 pair of number 8 (4mm) knitting needles
4mm crochet hook


Knitted in stocking stitch with garter stitch borders


Cast on 41 sts,
Work 4 rows K
Increase for tabs;
Cast on 10 sts at beginning of next row, k14, p to last 4 sts, k4.
Cast on 10 sts at beginning of next row, k14, p to last 14sts, k14.
Work buttonholes; (work these 2 rows straight if using Velcro).
(K2, yf k2tog) 3 times, work to end keeping edges in garter st.
Repeat this row for buttonholes on the other tab.
Cast off 10 sts at beginning of next row.
Next row – cast off 10 sts, k4, p2 tog, p to last 6 sts, p2tog, k4.
Dec 1 st at each end on every fol 6th row until 25 sts remain.


Divide for neck;
Work 11 sts, cast off 3, work to end – complete this half first.
1) k4, p to end
2) cast off 2, k to end
3) k4, p to end
4) k2tog, k to end
5) k4, p2tog, p to end
Work 4 rows straight
10) K to last 5 sts, inc in next st, k4.
11) K4, p to last st, inc in next st.
12) Cast on 2 sts, k to end, (11sts)
13) K4, p to end
14) K
Break yarn and rejoin to the other side of neck.
Work to match, reversing shaping’s and ending at winghole edge.
Next row – k, cast on 3, k across sts from other side of neck.
Next row , k4 inc in next st, p to last 5 sts, inc in next st, k4.
Inc 1 st at each end of every fol 6th row until there are 41 sts on the needle.
Work 6 rows straight.
Change to gst and knit 4 rows.
Cast off.


Sew on buttons or Velcro as desired.
Work double crochet around neck.

Another one for those better at sewing than knitting

I use a long sleeved sweater made of stretchy acrylic fabric and cut off part of a sleeve. Measure the length of the cock’s body from the bottom of the neck to the tail and add a few extra inches to see how much of the sleeve to cut. You can always cut more off if it is too much.

Then hold the sleeve up to the chicken to see approximately where the wings sit, and cut two small holes about the size of a quarter or half dollar on each side for the wings to come out. You can then slide the sleeve over the chicken’s head, pull the wings through the holes and there’s your sweater! I usually roll the top part down like a turtle neck, and roll the back part down and sew it so that it doesn’t hang down at all and get caught in her feet. The important thing is to have really stretchy material to work with so you can pull the wings through without hurting him – you can probably find good sweaters for this at a thrift shop or something.

[Lisa H]

Re: Donate a cock sock, help save local farmers

I would like to give a hand to keep those cocks warm. Are American cocks any different to Aussie cocks. I did get to see different cocks when I went on missions with my father and noticed some countries have smaller cocks, especially in Asia.

[Lycia The Repentant]

Re: Donate a cock sock, help save local farmers

Oh my, the thought of those poor cocks shriveling in the cold just gives me the willies! I wasn't sure what I could do to help keep these poor cocks nice and warm when my landlord Mr. Dick Johnson came up with an excellent idea

He asked me to stop by his apartment unit tomorrow for a lunch of weiners, noodles and sausages, and he would show me this great tool he has for keeping cocks warm and happy! I don't quite know what it is yet, but he says its made of wood.

I can't wait to do what I can for these little cocks with their cute little peckers, I've loved them since I was a little girl!

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: Donate a cock sock, help save local farmers

Not knowing much more than a need for civic duty I am not sure about how close to a ''snug fit'' these things need to be. Is there some sort of stretchy yarn that could be used to make one size fits all? If you wish to submit any questions to the FAA group I will be glad to present them to the club so they might answer but please remember that the normal age in the FAA is 14-15 years old.