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  • End Of The World Imminent, Please Send In Your Tithes Now

    Hey friends! I'm soooo happy right now I could just sing! I KNOW my Redeemer Lives, and now I know He's coming SOON! He's written His Message in the Heavens for all the world to see!

    Blood Moons!



    The sun shall be turned into darkness, and the moon into blood, before the great and the terrible day of the LORD comes.
    Joel 2:31

    The sun shall be turned into darkness, and the moon into blood, before that great and notable day of the Lord come:
    And it shall come to pass, that whosoever shall call on the name of the Lord shall be saved.
    Acts 2:20-21

    And I beheld when he had opened the sixth seal, and, lo, there was a great earthquake; and the sun became black as sackcloth of hair, and the moon became as blood
    Revelation 6:12


    A "blood moon" gets its name from the reddish color given off by the totally eclipsed Moon.

    Not only that, but In Jewish tradition, a total solar eclipse is a warning than Judgement is imminent. The eclipse will be placed by Christ Jesus Almighty Himself right over northern Europe so the British and Swedish can recognize the importance of making those Islam immigrants scram. Also, God simply hates Denmark and probably always has. Pastor Mark Biltz, intimately familiar with the signs of God as written in the language of the moon, says,

    "An event of this magnitude at the very beginning of the religious new year demands attention. As the Bible tells us, there will be signs in the heavens on the feast days, and this is a very significant sign on a critical day."

    And signs we have aplenty!

    The upcoming eclipses has been placed by Christ Jesus Almighty Himself smack dab in the middle of what NASA calls a "lunar tetrad," which is four successive blood moons.

    And just Look at the Feast Days Jesus has planned!

    Christ Jesus Almighty Himself has decided to share these events on major Jewish holidays!



    Let's look at history and see what Jesus had in store for the Jews the last three times He wrote this message in the Heavens:
    • In 1492 the Jews were expelled from Spain
    • In 1948 there was seven years of the living hell of the Holocaust
    • In 1967 there was the Six Day War


    We can only surmise that Christ Jesus Almighty Himself is planning a Mighty Smiting on the Jewish people, announcing His Imminent Return!


    Behold, the day of the Lord cometh, and thy spoil shall be divided in the midst of thee.

    For I will gather all nations against Jerusalem to battle; and the city shall be taken, and the houses rifled, and the women ravished;
    and half of the city shall go forth into captivity, and the residue of the people shall not be cut off from the city.

    Then shall the Lord go forth, and fight against those nations, as when he fought in the day of battle.

    And his feet shall stand in that day upon the mount of Olives, which is before Jerusalem on the east, and the mount of Olives shall cleave in the midst thereof toward the east and toward the west,
    and there shall be a very great valley; and half of the mountain shall remove toward the north, and half of it toward the south.

    Zechariah 14:1-4




    So Please! Send in your tithes now! Be counted among the Saved!

    Don't be fooled into thinking Jesus will take you to Heaven because you're a nice person. He won't care. He'll look to see if you have been Saved, and if not, you'll hear His message from the business end of His AR-15 Assault Rifle!


    Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.


  • #2
    Re: End Of The World Imminent, Please Send In Your Tithes Now

    I'm a little strapped for funds right now....but I have several dozen cases of 45 grain .223 jacketed hollow points, and some high capacity mags. I do hope Jesus will accept these love offerings in lieu of cash.

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    • #3
      Re: End Of The World Imminent, Please Send In Your Tithes Now

      God bless you, Sister E for alerting us to all that good news.

      From what you told us there, it sounds like Jesus will be coming before the 2016 election. That will be a wonderful thing because it looks as if the lesbian could win if the election were actually to be held.

      Praise Jesus.
      Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.

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      • #4
        Re: End Of The World Imminent, Please Send In Your Tithes Now

        I need a new plane, people. NOW is the time to show Jesus how much you want me to have that plane.
        Who Will Jesus Damn?

        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

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        • #5
          Re: End Of The World Imminent, Please Send In Your Tithes Now

          Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
          I need a new plane, people. NOW is the time to show Jesus how much you want me to have that plane.
          Pastor Ezekiel, we haven't yet purchased the A380, but we do have a used Boeing 777-200ER in our possession which we could fit out at short notice. We've had it for a bit over 12 months. I know it's not an A380, but would the 777 do in the interim? In case you're not sure, the 777 looks remarkably like this one.

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