Teddy bears, stuffed animals, plush toys....SEX TOYS FROM SATAN!

[Jeb Stuart Thurmond]

For her 6th birthday I gave my daughter, Alice, a plush Unicorn. I did it to remind her of the many Biblical teachings related to this rare creature:

God brought them out of Egypt; he hath as it were the strength of the unicorn."--Numbers 23:22
"God brought him forth out of Egypt; he hath as it were the strength of an unicorn."--Numbers 24:8
"His glory is like the firstling of his bullock, and his horns are like the horns of unicorns: with them he shall push the people together to the ends of the earth."--Deuteronomy 33:17
"Will the unicorn be willing to serve thee, or abide by thy crib? Canst thou bind the unicorn with his band in the furrow? or will he harrow the valleys after thee? Wilt thou trust him, because his strength is great? or wilt thou leave thy labour to him? Wilt thou believe him, that he will bring home thy seed, and gather it into thy barn?"--Job 39:9-12
"Save me from the lion's mouth; for thou hast heard me from the horns of unicorns."--Psalm 22:21
"He maketh them (the cedars of Lebanon) also to skip like a calf; Lebanon and Sirion like a young unicorn."--Psalm 29:6
"But my horn shalt thou exalt like the horn of the unicorn: I shall be anointed with fresh oil."--Psalm 92:10
"And the unicorns shall come down with them, and the bullocks with their bulls; and their land shall be soaked with blood, and their dust made fat with fatness."--Isaiah 34:7

Recently I asked her how she liked her unicorn, and what she had learned from it. She said that she "rode" the unicorn often, and after a while she gets a "fuzzy feeling". Instantly I understood what was going on. My intended Biblical teaching aide had become an aide of an entirely different nature - a sex toy, teaching her all the techniques of whoredom!

After a very vigorous paddling session I burned the plush sex-toy in front of her, pausing only to brush the tears from her eyes so she could see the burning clearly.

I then sent her to bed without dinner and got to work researching the horrors of plush toys. It turns out there is even a form of plush "love doll" called "teddy babes"!



And then there are these:





Even when they are not inducing orgasms, some plush toys are terrible role models. Just look at these:



The Bible tells us that Satan will come to us in soft, cuddly ways. "Wolves in Sheeps clothing" is the exact quote. Indeed, many plush toys are made of actual wool!

PARENTS! BEWARE WOLVES IN (Soft, cuddly) SHEEPS CLOTHING!

[Nobar King]

Re: Teddy bears, stuffed animals, plush toys....SEX TOYS FROM SAT

Here's another disgusting entry:

The Kyoto Ectoplasm Girl

by Scott Beale on June 22, 2009 · 0 comments



photos by Hine Mizushima
“The Kyoto Ectoplasm Girl” by Hine Mizushima, appearing in the “Kokeshi: From Folk Art to Art Toy” show taking place July 11th through October 4th at Japanese American National Museum in Los Angeles.

I'm not even going to attempt a guess as to what is going on here.

[angels]

Re: Teddy bears, stuffed animals, plush toys....SEX TOYS FROM SAT

i must be completely stupid i think....because i don't understand any of what i've just read in this thread......please can someone explain?..thankyou..

[Miss April]

Re: Teddy bears, stuffed animals, plush toys....SEX TOYS FROM SAT

Here's another disgusting entry:
I'm not even going to attempt a guess as to what is going on here.

eww That's one of the sickest things i've ever seen in my life I don't even want to know what's going on there either Brother Nobar

[Miss April]

Re: Teddy bears, stuffed animals, plush toys....SEX TOYS FROM SAT

i must be completely stupid i think....because i don't understand any of what i've just read in this thread......please can someone explain?..thankyou..

What don't you understand about it?

[angels]

Re: Teddy bears, stuffed animals, plush toys....SEX TOYS FROM SAT

What don't you understand about it?

well how can a teddy bear,be a sex toy from the devil?...i don't understand..

[Donald Callahan]

Re: Teddy bears, stuffed animals, plush toys....SEX TOYS FROM SAT

eww That's one of the sickest things i've ever seen in my life I don't even want to know what's going on there either Brother Nobar

She is spitting out the soul form of a feline. You know, reading things really helps you understand what they are about.

[Donald Callahan]

Re: Teddy bears, stuffed animals, plush toys....SEX TOYS FROM SAT

Recently I asked her how she liked her unicorn, and what she had learned from it. She said that she "rode" the unicorn often, and after a while she gets a "fuzzy feeling". Instantly I understood what was going on. My intended Biblical teaching aide had become an aide of an entirely different nature - a sex toy, teaching her all the techniques of whoredom!

After a very vigorous paddling session I burned the plush sex-toy in front of her, pausing only to brush the tears from her eyes so she could see the burning clearly.

I then sent her to bed without dinner and got to work researching the horrors of plush toys.

Did you bother explaining why she was beaten and forced to be malnourished? It is hard to learn a lesson when all you receive is punishment without the knowledge of why. At this point I wouldn't be surprised if she just though you were being a mean person to her, giving her a toy for her birthday and then taking it from her and burning it in front of her days later. Not to mention the "vigorous padlling" and being sent to bed without eating.

Parent of the year here people.

[alpha999888]

Re: Teddy bears, stuffed animals, plush toys....SEX TOYS FROM SAT

You know what? You people are sick in the head. You hit your own children for things they dont understand. And ferthermore you make fun of anothers culture. In this case the japanease for that picture of the feline ghost. Please tell me, did god tell you in your sleep that "All men are created equal." does not apply to anyone anymore? And also im 15. If i was hit as a kid i would grow to hate my parents and probably run away. Some even go inot prostitution to get by, by themselfs. I might even be able to tell the children hotline what you people are doing and have you tired in court. Get with the times. You cant abuse kids like you used ot anymore just because it was not allowed in your time. Must i tell you what you and your wives/husbands did to make your children or what your parents did to make you? You people make me sick. PLEASE enlighten me and tell me that god WANTS you to inflict pain on your children. Hmmm have you even ever tried, oooooh i don't know, TALKING to your children and tell them not to do somthing if its bad? Do you people imedatly whip out a belt or a paddle or a ruler and hit your child when they do even the slightes thing wrong? Because from my prospective you all are equal to drunks beating their wives. Please tell me how thats diffrent and if you were a kid or when you were a kid would you or did you like to be beat? Do you really think so low of humans to not learn anything unless they were beat? well let me tell you, i am christain and i was never beat even once. I turned out fine. My parents just calmly sa me down and talked to me insted of beating me. most kids that are beat fear the person beating them for the rest of their lives. Do you really want your children fearing you? Stop the chain and just sit down wit hyour kids and talk to them. and if you must know im an honor student and get the highest grades in my class. One of my best subjects is Phycology and yes that is a class in my school. PLEASE enlighten me on how go would want to see a man beating their childern. in my opinion, if i was god i would send you straight to hell. all who agree with what you people do.

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

Re: Teddy bears, stuffed animals, plush toys....SEX TOYS FROM SAT

Alpha, you see that "Enter" key on your keyboard? It's a pretty big one, you can't miss it. Use that to make paragraphs. I couldn't understand what you were trying to say in the Wall of Text but I did notice you made some errors...

Please tell me, did god tell you in your sleep that "All men are created equal." does not apply to anyone anymore?

Since when is that in the Bible??? Seems to me you mixed up the U.S. Constitution with the Bible!

well let me tell you, i am christain and i was never beat even once. I turned out fine.

Well if you define "fine" as chronic misspelling, rebellious nature, inability to type, poor use of logic, weak debating skills, being annoying, being unoriginal, being boring, and going straight to Hell....

then yea, I guess you're "fine".

[Jake the Papist]

Re: Teddy bears, stuffed animals, plush toys....SEX TOYS FROM SAT

What the HELL is wrong with you? You beat your child for something she didn't even do. The only crime against God that took place in your house is you beating your child for no reason and coming up with some whack job self justification.

[Paulie]

Re: Teddy bears, stuffed animals, plush toys....SEX TOYS FROM SAT

I've been reading many post here in the past few months, but this one angered me and I had to sign up for an account.

After reading Jeb's situation and how he resolved it, I found I became angry. In no way am I telling another parent how to raise their children, but this borders the line of child cruelty in my eyes.

Fisrt off I'm sure she had no idea what she was feeling was sexuall in nature, rather a new feeling that she couldn't associate with good or bad. Instead of educating your daughter you chose to punish her with no explination, beat her then burn a gift that was given to her out of love.

This will definitally send her mixed messages, have you at least sat down with her and explained why she was punished so servearlly? Maybee it's time to educate her about her body (only what she needs to know, no need to get to deep into it.)

I am in no means judging you Jeb (the good lord will do that) but I must call your parenting into question, it actually frightens me.

[4chan troll]

Re: Teddy bears, stuffed animals, plush toys....SEX TOYS FROM SAT

I've been reading many post here in the past few months, but this one angered me and I had to sign up for an account.

After reading Jeb's situation and how he resolved it, I found I became angry. In no way am I telling another parent how to raise their children, but this borders the line of child cruelty in my eyes.

Fisrt off I'm sure she had no idea what she was feeling was sexuall in nature, rather a new feeling that she couldn't associate with good or bad. Instead of educating your daughter you chose to punish her with no explination, beat her then burn a gift that was given to her out of love.

This will definitally send her mixed messages, have you at least sat down with her and explained why she was punished so servearlly? Maybee it's time to educate her about her body (only what she needs to know, no need to get to deep into it.)

I am in no means judging you Jeb (the good lord will do that) but I must call your parenting into question, it actually frightens me.

Finally, someone with some sense, Amen

These people are monsters, and might God have mercy on them ( just like they have for their sons and daughters ) for ashaming us all Christians.

[Levi Jones]

Re: Teddy bears, stuffed animals, plush toys....SEX TOYS FROM SAT

Finally, someone with some sense, Amen

These people are monsters, and might God have mercy on them ( just like they have for their sons and daughters ) for ashaming us all Christians.

Oh Joy. Another buffet Christian. Why not head over to The introduction forum to lay into us?

[David Goldman]

Re: Teddy bears, stuffed animals, plush toys....SEX TOYS FROM SAT

Finally, someone with some sense, Amen

These people are monsters, and might God have mercy on them ( just like they have for their sons and daughters ) for ashaming us all Christians.

Don't be so quick to call yourself a Christian. From the tone of your post, I'd say the odds are that you are on a one way trip to Hell.

Why don't you swing by the introduction forum and tell us a little bit about yourself. We'll be able to sort very quickly if you an atheist troll in disguise, a false christian, or a severly misguided True Christian™ who became temporarily insane the moment that you posted this.