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| Auntie Flo's Prayer Shack for Women For the women of Landover to discuss recipes, shoes, makeup tips, or whatever it is you natter about. Ensure you have the proper permission from your husband or father before posting. |
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#1
08-31-2007, 02:40 PM
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Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
In honor of Paris Hilton's conversion to Christianity (see footnote), this year the gold, silver, bronze, and first runner-up prize for the Sunday School labor-day essay contest ("How the estate tax persecutes America's hard-working heirs") will be this $270 hot pink calfskin Bible.
 Don't expect to be the next First Lady of the USA without it! (The prize for winning boys will be the usual selection of sidearms). Footnote: Proof of Paris Hilton's conversion to Christianity:
__________________
Proud supporter of Bobby Jindal For President/Exorcist-in-chief 2012! REGISTER TO VOTE! Hey Kids! Who needs Harry Potter when you have Playtime with Jesus? Hey TeEnZ! Dig dese off-da-hook republican rapperz! Got questions? USE OUR SEARCH ENGINE HERE! Last edited by Jeb Thurmond; 01-08-2008 at 09:48 PM. 
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#2
08-31-2007, 03:03 PM
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Re: Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
That is gooooooorgeous Brother Jeb!
I want one! As a matter of fact, I think I'm going to order one for all the Ladies of Landover for Christmas presents. No well dressed True Christian™ gal should be without one. I bet Betty Bower's already has one. Thank you for posting it! Sister Thumper
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#3
08-31-2007, 08:31 PM
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Re: Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
Oooooooh that is so beautiful! I want one those pink Bibles too!
__________________
1st Timothy 2: 9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; 1st Timothy 2: 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works ... 1 Timothy 5: 16 If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed ... Proverbs 31: 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness ... Proverbs 31: 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness ...
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#5
09-01-2007, 01:11 AM
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Re: Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
Quote:
... don't think Jesus will approve, noddy 
__________________
1st Timothy 2: 9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; 1st Timothy 2: 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works ... 1 Timothy 5: 16 If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed ... Proverbs 31: 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness ... Proverbs 31: 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness ...
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#7
09-01-2007, 06:38 AM
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Re: Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
Quote:
You said you were here to debate us, and we let you in. Now you've betrayed your promise by explicitly stating that you don't care what we think. If only you were in Iraq. Over here we know how to deal with people who try to sneak into the Green Zone under false premises. And this forum, friend, is GOD'S GREEN ZONE™ In short: Either learn to state your case in an adult manner or get ready to be banned by the first moderator to come along.
__________________
Founder and CEO of Trickle-Down Charities, LLC. Current Project: Help Barnard Madoff cooloff™ Goal: $100,000 Currently raised: $96,400.75 DONATE NOW!
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#8
09-01-2007, 08:40 AM
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Re: Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
I meant 2000, and it makes perfect sense. And I'm sorry for sounding rude, it's just that I'm getting irritated with you, as you are probably irritated with me.
And please, don't get me started about Iraq.
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#9
09-01-2007, 08:51 AM
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Re: Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
Quote:
__________________
 The Greatest Blog in the History of forever:
http://washohanleyshow.blogspot.com/ Topics of Vital Importance: Asians - The Devil's Squinty-Eyed Servants Jimmy Carter Begins Diplomatic Talks to Bring Sexy Back Restoring Honor: A Roadtrip Into the Heart of Darkness Christian Missionaries to Brooklyn Unsure if Ironic New York Hipsters are Really Serious About Christ
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The information presented here is Biblically accurate. Opinions concerning the technical difficulties, fitness requirements, safety, and ratings of self-crucifixion, flagellation, stoning, destroying enemies of GOD utterly, without mercy, and other activities inherent in Christianity are subjective and may differ from yours or others' opinions; therefore be warned that you must exercise your own judgment as to the difficulty and your ability to safely protect yourself from the inherent risks and dangers. Do not use the information provided on this site unless you are a True Christian ™ who understands and accepts the risks of participating in these activities. Landover Baptist Church makes reasonable efforts to include accurate and up to date information on this website, errors or omissions sometimes occur, therefore the information contained on here is provided "as is" and without warranties of any kind either expressed or implied. Viewing, reading, or any other use of the information contained within this web site is purely the voluntary will of the viewer or user. You, 'the viewer' or 'user' shall not hold the publisher, owner, authors or other contributors of The Jesus Experience responsible for any incidents related directly or indirectly to the Experience. Landover Baptist Church, et. al., assumes no liability or responsibility for your actions.
And I don't care what Jesus thi... oh wait, he can't think, he's been dead for 2k years!
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