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  • Pastor Ezekiel
    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
     
    • Sep 2006
    • 78552

    #1

    "Shut Up Devil!" Smartphone App Available Now

    THIS warms the cockles of my True Christian™ heart, and I know that Jesus is thrilled as well. With this new "app," any Christian can do battle with Satan using God's Own Words! Creationists are the greatest scienticians on earth! Glory!

    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
  • Benedict A. Davis
    Winning Souls in his Winnebago
    True Christian™
    • May 2010
    • 3900

    #2
    Re: "Shut Up Devil!" Smartphone App Available Now

    Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
    THIS warms the cockles of my True Christian™ heart, and I know that Jesus is thrilled as well. With this new "app," any Christian can do battle with Satan using God's Own Words! Creationists are the greatest scienticians on earth! Glory!

    Pastor Zeke, Is there an App that is a bit more to my liking, fire and brimstone and not this feel good.....stuff. If God is going to remind me let it be from On High!
    Have you considered doing one of these app things. Just Imagine every time the phone rings your face appears on the screen and YOU could deliver his Word. Shout Glory!
    sigpic 1 Chronicles 16:15
    Be ye mindful always of his covenant; the word which he commanded to a thousand generations ... an everlasting covenant.
    Proverbs 30:5,6: Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
    Add thou not unto his words, lest he reprove thee, and thou be found a liar.

    Comment

    • Jedediah
      True Christian™ Creation Scientist
      Fisher of Men
      True Christian™
      • Feb 2010
      • 6824

      #3
      Re: "Shut Up Devil!" Smartphone App Available Now

      This is awesome. Anything that will help prevent people from trying to work through issues on their own instead of adapting writings from before the fall of the Roman Empire to their 21st century lives can only be viewed as a boon for civilization. It's great to see that even in the age of sexy video games and rock and roll sex music, Jesus' elect find a way to keep believers from even trying to adapt their way of thinking to the modern world.

      Proverbs 3:5-6
      Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
      and do not lean on your own understanding.
      In all your ways acknowledge him,
      and he will make straight your paths.


      Everything we will ever need to know as a species has already been dictated, so what's the point of trying to figure anything out for ourselves? Who needs new ways of thinking, when we already have the Truth?
      II Thessalonians 1:7-9
      And to you who are troubled rest with us, when the Lord Jesus shall be revealed from heaven with his mighty angels,
      In flaming fire taking vengeance on them that know not God, and that obey not the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ:
      Who shall be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord, and from the glory of his power



      The man who is being progressively sanctified will inescapably sanctify his home, school, politics, economics, science, and all things else by understanding and interpreting all things in terms of the Word of God and by bringing all things under the Dominion of Christ the King. -R.J. Rushdoony

      Comment

      • Pastor Ezekiel
        Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
         
        • Sep 2006
        • 78552

        #4
        Re: "Shut Up Devil!" Smartphone App Available Now

        Shout GLORY should be on an app too!
        Who Will Jesus Damn?

        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

        Comment

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