[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Favorite Easter Recipes - Ham Ham Ham

HERB ROASTED SPOTTED OWL

Whole roast Spotted Owl with butter, parsley, thyme, rosemary, and other herbs.

INGREDIENTS:

• 1 Large Spotted Owl, about 4 to 5 pounds
• 1/2 lemon
• salt and pepper to taste
• 1 small onion, quartered
• Fresh herbs: 1/4 teaspoon dried rosemary and 1/4 teaspoon dried thyme
• 2 sprigs fresh parsley
• 1/4 cup melted butter

You know, Sister Thumper, rather than endangering further an already endangered species, it sounds like that recipe would go just as well with chicken!

[OnYourKnees]

Re: Favorite Easter Recipes - Ham Ham Ham

You know, Sister Thumper, rather than endangering further an already endangered species, it sounds like that recipe would go just as well with chicken!

Spotted owl AND chicken?

God hates gluttons! Put down that joint, Van Munchies!

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Favorite Easter Recipes - Ham Ham Ham

Spotted owl AND chicken?

God hates gluttons! Put down that joint, Van Munchies!

Who's the glutton??
I suggested using the chicken instead of the owl.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: Favorite Easter Recipes - Ham Ham Ham

You know, Sister Thumper, rather than endangering further an already endangered species, it sounds like that recipe would go just as well with chicken!

Oh shush your baby eating pie hole Heathen.

Pastor Zeke PREFERS Spotted Owl, so THAT is what he will get. Got it?

Good Lord, you tree huggers are always complaining about something......endangered species this.....endangerd species that.

Who cares about the environment. Everyone except us True Christians™ are going to Hell anyway. THe only thing you will be eating there is Satan's trouser snake. ENJOY SINNER!


GLORY!!!!!!!!!

[Glendora Christianson]

Re: Favorite Easter Recipes - Ham Ham Ham

Sister GC, I was always partial to your Anti-Passover Loaf, a seasonal favorite throughout Iowa, but I've lost the recipe. Any chance you'd post it again?

Every since we moved I have been looking for that recipe. I'm still missing my 5.5 Quart Rival Crock Pot too, and I'm wondering if Elmer might have used it to steam clean his carburetor. Anyway, I think that Anti-Passover Loaf has seven kinds of pork . . . ham, sausage, pig's feet, hot dogs (Wal-Mart brand), bacon, and pork rinds on top.

[WilliamJenningsBryan]

Re: Favorite Easter Recipes - Ham Ham Ham

Noisettes of Dolphin with Artichokes

8 baby artichokes
Slice of Lemon
14 ounces of Dolphin filet
1 tablespoon capers
Virgin olive oil for skillet
1 bunch scallions, white bulbs and part of green tops, chopped
2 ounces sliced bacon, with fat, cut into strips
1 cup Chicken Stock, or canned chicken broth
2 tablespoons chopped fresh parsley
Freshly ground black pepper
Salt

Wash artichokes and pull off tough outside leaves. Trim off tops and cut artichokes into quarters. If they have already developed spiny centers, cut out with a sharp knife. Set aside in a bowl of cold water with lemon slice.

Cut dolphin into 1" - thick noisettes. Put capers to soak in cold water to wash off surplus salt (or brine, if using brine-cured capers).

Heat enough olive oil in a medium-sized skillet to just coat the bottom. Sauté dolphin noisettes, turning to brown on both sides, about 3 minutes total. Remove as they cook and keep warm.

Add scallions and bacon to the pan. Fry briefly over high heat and then add pieces of artichoke. Stir-fry all together for 5 to 6 minutes. Add stock and drained capers, reduce heat, and simmer for 10 to 15 minutes more, or until the artichokes are cooked.

Return dolphin noisettes to pan, add parsley, black pepper, and salt (if required). Mix meat with artichokes and serve at once with pan sauce.

[H. Montague Worthington]

Re: Favorite Easter Recipes - Ham Ham Ham

Lynne Cheney's Newborn Bunny Kabobs

Pierce a litter of newborn bunnies (8-12 bunnies, 3 oz. each) on skewers. Marinate 2-3 hours in a broth made from chicken stock, the bones of Iraqi children, salt, peppercorns, thyme, sage, and three tablets of crushed Cialis.

Use a mixture of half vegetable oil and half olive oil to lubricate a medium hot grill. Sprinkle bunny kabobs with paprika, parsley, salt, and pepper. Brush with olive oil, and place on grill. Close cover. Heat for 25 minutes, turn kabobs, and heat for 20 more minutes. Serve with sangria and salad.

GLORY!!

[Larry Lee]

Re: Favorite Easter Recipes - Ham Ham Ham

Lynne Cheney's Newborn Bunny Kabobs

Pierce a litter of newborn bunnies (8-12 bunnies, 3 oz. each) on skewers. Marinate 2-3 hours in a broth made from chicken stock, the bones of Iraqi children, salt, peppercorns, thyme, sage, and three tablets of crushed Cialis.

Use a mixture of half vegetable oil and half olive oil to lubricate a medium hot grill. Sprinkle bunny kabobs with paprika, parsley, salt, and pepper. Brush with olive oil, and place on grill. Close cover. Heat for 25 minutes, turn kabobs, and heat for 20 more minutes. Serve with sangria and salad.

GLORY!!

Don't forget the dollop of lamb's blood in your marinade!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Favorite Easter Recipes - Ham Ham Ham

With Easter just around the corner, I decided to dig around for some of my mother's mouth-watering pork recipes. This one's a doozy. Ladies, feel free to use it on your own families.

BEER BATTER FRIED BACON CHEESE DOGS
Ingredients:
hot dogs
1 slice of thick-cut bacon per dog
cans of canned spray cheese
dark beer (It doesn't matter what kind.)
1-2 cups flour
lard for frying

Instructions:
This one is a little work-intensive, so be ready to buckle down. First take the center out of the hot dog with an apple corer. Fill the cavity with the spray cheese and use the hot dog "meat" you removed from the middle as a cap to keep the cheese in. Wrap the bacon around the hot dog and deep-fry in lard for two to four minutes or until bacon is cooked. Let cool and dab them dry with a paper towel (so the batter will stick). Mix the beer with the flour until it reaches a thick, but lump-free consistency. Dip the dogs in the batter, coating the dog completely, and deep-fry in more lard on high heat for two to three minutes, or until brown.
NOTE: Don't fry them too long or all of the cheese will explode out into the lard.

[Larry Lee]

Re: Favorite Easter Recipes - Ham Ham Ham

With Easter just around the corner, I decided to dig around for some of my mother's mouth-watering pork recipes. This one's a doozy.

I hardly know what to think of that Godly recipe. In all modesty, I think I'm too much of a sinner (despite my Lord's sacrifice etc etc) to be worthy of such a food.

[BornAgain]

Re: Favorite Easter Recipes - Ham Ham Ham

Fried Chitterlings (Chitlins) and Hog Maws

Ingredients:
2 pounds hog maws (pig stomach)
2 pounds chitterlings (pig intestines)
3 quarts water
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon red pepper (flakes)
1 medium peeled onion (white or yellow)

The hog maws are the thickest and will therefore take the longest to cook. Rinse them thoroughly as you trim off the excess fat. Put them in a 6 quart pot along with your 3 quarts water, onion, pepper, and salt. Bring them to a boil, then reduce heat to medium and cook for 1 hour 15 minutes.
While maws are cooking, rinse chitterlings thoroughly and trim the extra fat off them. Like most organ meats, they have a lot of fat. Add chitterlings to pot after maws have cooked for 1 hour 15 minutes. Cook another 1 hour 30 minutes or until tender. Add a little extra water if necessary.
Prepare a large cast iron skillet with 1/4 stick of butter. Remove maws and chitterlings from pot and slice. I use to slice them right in the preheated skillet although you can use a cutting board. Then stir with a large metal spoon as you lightly brown them. You can pour out the water from the pot, including the onion. The onion added a little flavor and made them smell nicer while simmering.
A variation on this recipe is to slice the chitterlings and hog maws into pieces as above, but them put them back in the pot with the stock. Again, you can get rid of the onion. Cover the pot and simmer the cut up mixture for another 50 minutes.
If you don't like onion or don't have onion, you can add four or five bay leaves to the mixture instead.. Again, you throw the bay leaves away before frying or cooking down the chitterlings.
By now the hog maws and chitterlings should be thoroughly done and almost falling apart. You can serve them with your favorite side dishes such as greens, maccaroni and cheese, or rice. And they are great for converting Joos and Mudslums!

[Larry Lee]

Re: Favorite Easter Recipes - Ham Ham Ham

You can serve them with your favorite side dishes such as greens, maccaroni and cheese, or rice. And they are g[/FONT][FONT=Arial]reat for converting Joos and Mudslums!

Converting Joos and Mudslimes is one thing, but if you intend to eat the chitlins yourself, trust me, you'll want to serve them with LOTS of hot sauce. Did I mention you'll need a lot? of hot sauce? like Tabasco. a lot of it.

[H. Montague Worthington]

Re: Favorite Easter Recipes - Ham Ham Ham

Deep-Fried Ham Balls

8 oz, ham minced
2 scallions, minced
3 eggs, beaten
4 sliced stale bread
2 T. flour
1/2 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. dry mustard
Oil for deep-frying
Mix together the ham, scallions and egg. In a food processor make the stale bread into breadcrumbs. Mix it in with the ham. Add in the flour, mustard and salt. Shape into walnut size balls. Deep fry until golden brown

[OnYourKnees]

Re: Favorite Easter Recipes - Ham Ham Ham

Ladies, THIS is a recipe for disaster. Do not cook like Godless Brazilian housewives!

Housewife Convicted of Frying Husband
By STAN LEHMAN
AP
SAO PAULO, Brazil (March 23) - A Brazilian housewife was convicted and sentenced to 19 years in prison Friday for killing her husband, chopping his body into small pieces and frying it. Rosanita Nery dos Santos, 52, drugged her husband in his sleep, then stabbed him to death two years ago in Salvador, about 900 miles northeast of Sao Paulo, said police spokesman Idmar Bonfim.

She then hacked Jose Raimundo Soares dos Santos' body into more than 100 pieces, which she boiled and fried before serving at an Easter dinner at her Catholic church, Bonfim said. He said police discovered leftover parts in the church freezer after receiving an anonymous phone call.

Bonfim said the killing was either part of a black magic ritual or an attempt by the wife to cancel a debt to the Catholic church of $34,000 in past-due tithes.

Citing testimony from the woman's relatives, he said she may also have committed the crime "to avenge the Virgin Mother and her female descendants of centuries of oppression by their husbands." He did not provide further details.

Santos denied killing her husband but said she chopped up his body, Bonfim said.

"She claims masked priests entered her house, killed her husband and then forced her to cut up the body, fry it, and serve it because the church had no meat for the Easter meal," he said.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Favorite Easter Recipes - Ham Ham Ham

Ladies, THIS is a recipe for disaster. Do not cook like Godless Brazilian housewives!

"She claims masked priests entered her house, killed her husband and then forced her to cut up the body, fry it, and serve it because the church had no meat for the Easter meal," he said.

Yet another example of why Jesus hates mary worshipers. I have no doubt that her story is true. Those dress-wearing pervert priests have not even a shred of decency.