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As if the japs and the papists don't do enough to offend Jesus already, now they've come up with THIS obscenity. Words do not suffice to encapsulate my outrage. 
The Quasi-Catholic Sex Cult that Requires Yogurt-Smeared Sex in Public
What should excommunicated pervert priests do after their banishments? How about join a "Catholic" sex cult that requires a woman with yogurt-smeared genitals to copulate with her pastor in front of the whole congregation? Meet the Little Pebble church.
Little Pebble Dohsyuku-kai is a Japanese "commune" that self-identifies as Catholic. They believe one congregant is in the midst of a virgin pregnancy with twins. Consequently, the priest must piffle her on an altar everyday, while everyone watches and prays.
William "The Little Pebble" Kamm, whom Vice describes as a "cultish, quasi-Catholic huckster convicted of sexual assault on a teenage girl," founded the church. After his 2005 imprisonment, estranged follower Father Jean-Marie Thornbush Little John (must... resist... penis joke...) rallied a congregation of five (or seven, if you count the theoretically embryonic twins) in rural Japan. His flock has a shocking website depicting their rituals, which includes Jean-Marie copulating daily with pregnant virgin Clara-Josefa-Menendez Yumi Abe. Vice writer Li Kouji <attended one such ritual:
"When prayers were finished, the two plopped themselves down on a futon mattress in front of the altar and Jean-Marie began sucking on Clara's tits for several minutes. Then they started 69-ing. When that was done, Jean-Marie pulled Clara between his legs, spooned some yogurt on her shaved pubis, and began massaging it in with his cock. […] Devotees claim there's no penetration involved, but what followed looked like penetration to us."
Kouji also conducted interviews. Jean-Marie—who started his theological career as a celibate Catholic and member of the Franciscan Society of the Atonement—explained the church's mission:
"God gave you orders so that Mr. Little Pebble [Kamm] could be saved from life in prison? What did he instruct you to do?
To have correct sex according to God's method in front of the altar, in front of the Eucharist, and therefore in front of God."
"Why do you smear yogurt all over the woman's genitalia during this ritual?
Clara-Josefa-Menendez has always been frigid and non-orgasmic, and because of this her vagina never gets wet. However, as I am a regular clergy who has taken a vow of celibacy and am therefore an unmarried virgin, I wasn't aware that you could buy lubricants to use in such circumstances. That's why I turned to yogurt."
Clara says she is content to have pleasureless sex for the benefit of the masses on a daily basis. It has to do with her father:
"I hear that you have correct sex every day. Do you get any pleasure out of it?
Not at all. [laughs] After moving here I learned that I was scarred emotionally as a child and that I have a problem with men in general. When I was young I witnessed how my father fooled around with numerous women, […] I've had sex with men in the past, I've cheated, I've been married twice, and had lots of premarital sex. I had one-night stands without thinking anything of it. But really, I was only doing it for the sake of it, and I never gained any pleasure out of sex."
"Does it differ in anyway from normal sex?
It's completely different. I've never had sex out of love. In fact, I'm fundamentally incapable of loving, but I know that Jean-Marie has correct sex because he wants to give love. I never experience sexual pleasure from having correct sex with Jean-Marie, and at times I even feel the same hatred toward him that I feel toward my father."
Clara's friends and family don't approve Little Pebble, but she doesn't mind: "I don't really have acquaintances anymore because I've shut them all out."
Jean-Marie also claims to have ordained the first gay marriage God has ever decided to permit. Here's one of the newlywed's now:
"You claim to be the first-ever Catholic gay couple to have married.
Longin: I have personally never heard of a wedding ceremony especially created for gay couples, so in that sense it is definitely a first. Sure, some countries allow same-sex marriages, but I think it's the first time in the history of mankind that God created an alternative form of holy matrimony for a gay couple."
Every Little Pebble utterance is nuttier than the last, all of them couched in the tranquil language of spiritual contentment.
What should excommunicated pervert priests do after their banishments? How about join a "Catholic" sex cult that requires a woman with yogurt-smeared genitals to copulate with her pastor in front of the whole congregation? Meet the Little Pebble church.
Little Pebble Dohsyuku-kai is a Japanese "commune" that self-identifies as Catholic. They believe one congregant is in the midst of a virgin pregnancy with twins. Consequently, the priest must piffle her on an altar everyday, while everyone watches and prays.
William "The Little Pebble" Kamm, whom Vice describes as a "cultish, quasi-Catholic huckster convicted of sexual assault on a teenage girl," founded the church. After his 2005 imprisonment, estranged follower Father Jean-Marie Thornbush Little John (must... resist... penis joke...) rallied a congregation of five (or seven, if you count the theoretically embryonic twins) in rural Japan. His flock has a shocking website depicting their rituals, which includes Jean-Marie copulating daily with pregnant virgin Clara-Josefa-Menendez Yumi Abe. Vice writer Li Kouji <attended one such ritual:
"When prayers were finished, the two plopped themselves down on a futon mattress in front of the altar and Jean-Marie began sucking on Clara's tits for several minutes. Then they started 69-ing. When that was done, Jean-Marie pulled Clara between his legs, spooned some yogurt on her shaved pubis, and began massaging it in with his cock. […] Devotees claim there's no penetration involved, but what followed looked like penetration to us."
Kouji also conducted interviews. Jean-Marie—who started his theological career as a celibate Catholic and member of the Franciscan Society of the Atonement—explained the church's mission:
"God gave you orders so that Mr. Little Pebble [Kamm] could be saved from life in prison? What did he instruct you to do?
To have correct sex according to God's method in front of the altar, in front of the Eucharist, and therefore in front of God."
"Why do you smear yogurt all over the woman's genitalia during this ritual?
Clara-Josefa-Menendez has always been frigid and non-orgasmic, and because of this her vagina never gets wet. However, as I am a regular clergy who has taken a vow of celibacy and am therefore an unmarried virgin, I wasn't aware that you could buy lubricants to use in such circumstances. That's why I turned to yogurt."
Clara says she is content to have pleasureless sex for the benefit of the masses on a daily basis. It has to do with her father:
"I hear that you have correct sex every day. Do you get any pleasure out of it?
Not at all. [laughs] After moving here I learned that I was scarred emotionally as a child and that I have a problem with men in general. When I was young I witnessed how my father fooled around with numerous women, […] I've had sex with men in the past, I've cheated, I've been married twice, and had lots of premarital sex. I had one-night stands without thinking anything of it. But really, I was only doing it for the sake of it, and I never gained any pleasure out of sex."
"Does it differ in anyway from normal sex?
It's completely different. I've never had sex out of love. In fact, I'm fundamentally incapable of loving, but I know that Jean-Marie has correct sex because he wants to give love. I never experience sexual pleasure from having correct sex with Jean-Marie, and at times I even feel the same hatred toward him that I feel toward my father."
Clara's friends and family don't approve Little Pebble, but she doesn't mind: "I don't really have acquaintances anymore because I've shut them all out."
Jean-Marie also claims to have ordained the first gay marriage God has ever decided to permit. Here's one of the newlywed's now:
"You claim to be the first-ever Catholic gay couple to have married.
Longin: I have personally never heard of a wedding ceremony especially created for gay couples, so in that sense it is definitely a first. Sure, some countries allow same-sex marriages, but I think it's the first time in the history of mankind that God created an alternative form of holy matrimony for a gay couple."
Every Little Pebble utterance is nuttier than the last, all of them couched in the tranquil language of spiritual contentment.
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