I'm Asgard's Own and Asgard's Finest, baby...

[Assgard's Own]

...So go ahead and judge me. :]

I love how you lot focus so much on Wicca and the Goth subculture and Catholics, but what about the TRUE religions--That is, those far more ancient than the trite, inane shite of today.

Asatruar {Or Odinism, for the idiots in the crowd}--I don't believe my path has ever been brought up on these forums before. So go ahead, guys; Condemn the Heathen. =D

My Patron God carries a Hammer. Yours was nailed to a tree. Any questions?

[JennyD]

Re: I'm Asgard's Own and Asgard's Finest, baby...

...So go ahead and judge me. :]

I love how you lot focus so much on Wicca and the Goth subculture and Catholics, but what about the TRUE religions--That is, those far more ancient than the trite, inane shite of today.

Asatruar {Or Odinism, for the idiots in the crowd}--I don't believe my path has ever been brought up on these forums before. So go ahead, guys; Condemn the Heathen. =D

My Patron God carries a Hammer. Yours was nailed to a tree. Any questions?

Please show us the ancient literature and other resources upon which you rely to establish your religion and the religious practices of Odiousism.

Thanks.

[Nobar King]

Re: I'm Asgard's Own and Asgard's Finest, baby...

you couldn't just add this to the false religion register??

Maybe you should go to www.asatruar.com/forum to discuss your pagan religion. We're here to discuss Jesus.

[VictoryOS]

Re: I'm Asgard's Own and Asgard's Finest, baby...

Asatruar {Or Odinism, for the idiots in the crowd}--I don't believe my path has ever been brought up on these forums before.

Why would we waste our time on you and the three other followers of this "religion"?

[Assgard's Own]

Re: I'm Asgard's Own and Asgard's Finest, baby...

Jenny--The Poetic and Prose Eddas form the basis of our religious text. Our "Bible", if you would.

Nobar--Why let all the damnation and threads be focused primarily on fad religions such as Wicca? Why not, at the very least, take advantage of this thread to gain some knowledge of something else outside of what pops up in the media all the time because of a bunch of kids trying to be spooky? I'm plenty capable of civil conversation, this could become a Q&A with a modern day Valkyrie.

Victory--Outside of the following note, see above paragraph. :]

We're considered one of the major religions of Scandinavia {Norway, Sweden, etc}. Right, three other followers and all...

[Nobar King]

Re: I'm Asgard's Own and Asgard's Finest, baby...

I don't think you understand the concept of this forum.

[Roberta]

Re: I'm Asgard's Own and Asgard's Finest, baby...

Didn't God smite this Odin dude for jerking off?

[JennyD]

Re: I'm Asgard's Own and Asgard's Finest, baby...

Jenny--The Poetic and Prose Eddas form the basis of our religious text. Our "Bible", if you would.

I see.

OK . . .

The eddas are two collections of old Norse writings which together form the most authoritative sources of Norse mythology available today. The oldest is the Poetic Edda which is a collection of thirty four Icelandic poems and prose dating from the 9th to 12th century. The second is the Prose Edda, the work of Icelandic poet and historian Snorri Sturluson (1179 - 1241).

Let's see, Jesus came to Earth 900 years before the oldest of your cult's poems was written. The Bible goes back 6,000 years, to the beginning of the Universe, or about 5,100 years before the oldest of your cult's poems. Your cult only got going in the 1960s. Yet, you claim that it's valid because . . .

Nobar--Why let all the damnation and threads be focused primarily on fad religions such as Wicca?

Or Asatru?

Ásatrú originated as a second (or third) revival of Germanic paganism in the 1960s and early 1970s. The Íslenska Ásatrúarfélagið was founded on summer solstice, 1972, and was recognized as an official religion by the Icelandic government in 1973, largely due to the efforts of Sveinbjörn Beinteinsson. Around this time, Stephen McNallen, a former U.S. Army Airborne Ranger, began publishing a newsletter titled The Runestone independently of the Íslenska Ásatrúarfélagið in the United States. He also formed an organization called the Ásatrú Free Assembly, which was later renamed the Ásatrú Folk Assembly which is still extant. Else Christensen's Odinism, which is sometimes identified with the term Ásatrú, originated around the same period. An offshoot of McNallen's group is the Ásatrú Alliance, headed by Valgard Murray, publisher of the "Vor Tru" newsletter. The Ásatrú Alliance held its 25th annual "Althing" gathering in 2005.[7]

Heck, even Wicca has been around since the 1950s!

Why not, at the very least, take advantage of this thread to gain some knowledge of something else outside of what pops up in the media all the time because of a bunch of kids trying to be spooky? I'm plenty capable of civil conversation, this could become a Q&A with a modern day Valkyrie.

OK, girlie, how many slain warriors have you carted off to Odin? And how's the eternity as a waitress going?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Valkyrie

In Norse mythology the valkyries (Old Norse Valkyrja "Choosers of the Slain") are dísir, minor female deities, who served Odin. The valkyries' purpose was to choose the most heroic of those who had died in battle and to carry them off to Valhalla where they became einherjar. This was necessary because Odin needed warriors to fight at his side at the preordained battle at the end of the world, Ragnarök. In Valhalla the valkyries also “serve drink and look after the tableware and drinking vessels” (Prose Edda Gylfaginning 36).

I did assume you'd bother to read your own "religious texts" before declaring yourself a spiritual chauffeur and serving wench.

Victory--Outside of the following note, see above paragraph. :]

We're considered one of the major religions of Scandinavia {Norway, Sweden, etc}. Right, three other followers and all...

A major religion in Scandinavia?

http://www.geert-hofstede.com/hofstede_netherlands.shtml

The Netherlands' religious demographics indicate no predominate religion (over 50%) being practiced within the country. However, the largest portion of the population (39%) identify themselves as Atheist. The next highest practicing group are Catholic at 31%, followed by Christians at 21%, Muslims at 5%, and others with 4%.

Hmm, so that makes less than 4% in the Netherlands, since that "others" includes wiccans, satanists, Scientologists, etc.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demographics_of_Sweden#Religion

Although an estimated 46 - 85%[citation needed] of Swedes are reported as being non-religious, the majority (78%) of the population belongs to the Church of Sweden, the Lutheran church separated from the state in 2000. This is because until recently, those who had family members in the church automatically became members at birth. Other Christian denominations in Sweden include Roman Catholic (see Catholic Church of Sweden), Orthodox, Baptist, and other evangelical Christian churches (frikyrkor = "free churches"). Some of the Sami practise Animism. There are also a number of Muslims, Buddhists and Jews in Sweden, mainly from immigration.

Hmm, no Odiousists.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demographics_of_Norway#Religion

The Lutheran Church of Norway is the state church and the vast majority remain at least nominal members. Other religions do, however, enjoy religious freedom and have prospered with immigration in recent years, particularly Islam and Roman Catholicism. Saint Olaf is the patron saint of Norway. He is regarded by some as the eternal king and has a reputation and place in history unchallenged by any other Norwegian King for the last 1000 years.
Official statistics (2003): Lutheran 86% (state church), other Christian 4.5% (mainly Protestant [3.5%] and Roman Catholic) [1%]), Islam 2%, other religions (Buddhism, Sikhism, Hinduism and Judaism) 1%, Human Ethical 1.5%, none and unknown 5%. The Eurometer poll on religious belief in Norway finds 9-10% of Norwegians in the poll survey are atheist or have no religion.

Wow, again, no Odinists. Must be among that massive 5% of unknown or other.

Your choice to look to Ed, Edd, and Edda instead of God's Holy Bible is your own; you're free to do whatever you like. However, be aware that there are consequences to worshipping false gods and joining ridiculous cults you read about in Marvel comic books. Consequences like eternal torture in the Hell God has created for the vast majority of humans, who will not follow His Law to the letter!

[ForGodsSake]

Re: I'm Asgard's Own and Asgard's Finest, baby...

...So go ahead and judge me. :]
So go ahead, guys; Condemn the Heathen. =D

There are many posts on here (Gods favourite forum) where heathens are condemned. Try reading the forum before you make senseless comments.

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: I'm Asgard's Own and Asgard's Finest, baby...

My false "god" carries a Hammer. Yours was nailed to a tree. Any questions?

Jesus was a carpenter, so He obviously carried a hammer too, dolt. Not only that, He only died for three days then was resurrected. He was there at the beginning of time and will be there at the end sitting in judgement of all humanity.

[JennyD]

Re: I'm Asgard's Own and Asgard's Finest, baby...

Where did AssGuard's Bone go?

I was waiting eagerly to hear how she's done with that whole spiritual serving wench career.

[VictoryOS]

Re: I'm Asgard's Own and Asgard's Finest, baby...

Where did AssGuard's Bone go?

I was waiting eagerly to hear how she's done with that whole spiritual serving wench career.

Too busy praying to all her gods, I suppose.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: I'm Asgard's Own and Asgard's Finest, baby...

I would say that you ladies successfully bitchslapped that demon back down to hell. Good job. Thanks for handling our light work.

[Nobar King]

Re: I'm Asgard's Own and Asgard's Finest, baby...

You weren't referring to me, right?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: I'm Asgard's Own and Asgard's Finest, baby...

You weren't referring to me, right?

Unless your name is Assguard the demon, then no, I wasn't.