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  • Rev. Carlton Green
    Confirmed Enemy of God
    BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
    • Nov 2006
    • 311
    #1

    Kristian Kids Art

    Due to the death of my no-good, dirty homer son Bobby, I have told my younger son, Matthew that it was Jesus' will for him to go.

    Hearing this, Matthew has put the issue to paper.

    Come see a Godly peice of art from the precious innocent mind of a child.
    Attached Files
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    • OnYourKnees
      On Extended Furlough
      True Christian™
      • Nov 2006
      • 4729
      #2
      Re: Kristian Kids Art

      Originally posted by Carlton Green View Post
      Come see a Godly piece of art from the precious innocent mind of a child.


      Kindly inform your obviously retarded 14-year-old son that Jesus is not a Gay Homer. Then correct him with the rod, as instructed by the good James Dobson.

        Comment

        • Pastor Ezekiel
          Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
           
          • Sep 2006
          • 78556
          #3
          Re: Kristian Kids Art

          Praise Jesus, your boy has talent. I like his depiction of Jesus holding the assault rifle.

          That being said, I'd take away all of those crayons. Exposure to so many colors will inevitably lead him to drawing rainbows. Next step, he'll take up the hobby of sodomy.
          Who Will Jesus Damn?

          Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

          Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

          Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

            Comment

            • OnYourKnees
              On Extended Furlough
              True Christian™
              • Nov 2006
              • 4729
              #4
              Re: Kristian Kids Art

              Now, here's some lovely artwork by Christian children.

              The theme is "Crazy About The Son", so they all have their pictures inserted as the faces of CATS. Clever, no?

                Comment

                • Rev. Carlton Green
                  Confirmed Enemy of God
                  BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                  • Nov 2006
                  • 311
                  #5
                  Re: Kristian Kids Art

                  Originally posted by OnYourKnees View Post


                  Kindly inform your obviously retarded 14-year-old son that Jesus is not a Gay Homer. Then correct him with the rod, as instructed by the good James Dobson.
                  Well Matthew CAN be dimwitted at times as he did indicate an arrow pointing to the heathen corpse below. But the arrow has been scribble over a bit. Perhaps this is a good reason enough to rod him?

                    Comment

                    • Pastor Ezekiel
                      Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                       
                      • Sep 2006
                      • 78556
                      #6
                      Re: Kristian Kids Art

                      Originally posted by OnYourKnees View Post
                      Now, here's some lovely artwork by Christian children.

                      The theme is "Crazy About The Son", so they all have their pictures inserted as the faces of CATS. Clever, no?

                      Encouraging children to visualize themselves as animals is a gateway to witchcraft. This is how VanLardbottom got her start. Now she has her "familiars" with her everywhere she goes.

                      I wish these schools would spend more time teaching boys how to clean a weapon and girls how to clean an oven.
                      Who Will Jesus Damn?

                      Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                      Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                      Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                        Comment

                        • Mrs. Mary Whitford
                          Ladies of Landover Senior VP
                          One of the Truest Christians™ Ever
                          Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
                          True Christian™
                          • Dec 2006
                          • 12414
                          #7
                          Re: Kristian Kids Art

                          Originally posted by OnYourKnees View Post
                          Now, here's some lovely artwork by Christian children.

                          The theme is "Crazy About The Son", so they all have their pictures inserted as the faces of CATS. Clever, no?

                          Imagining themselves as cats? Is this a school for furries, Brother Knees? With the direction our nation is going, I wouldn't be surprised.
                          Posted via Prayer

                          1 Timothy 2:13-15 For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.
                          Bearing my husband's heirs and being SAVED!

                          Blogging for CHRIST!
                          Witnessing for GOD on YouTube!
                          All a-Twitter for Salvation!
                          Bringing Jesus to MySpace!
                          On FIRE for the Lord on Facebook!
                          My Ladies of Landover profile!

                            Comment

                            • OnYourKnees
                              On Extended Furlough
                              True Christian™
                              • Nov 2006
                              • 4729
                              #8
                              Re: Kristian Kids Art

                              Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                              Encouraging children to visualize themselves as animals is a gateway to witchcraft. This is how VanLardbottom got her start. Now she has her "familiars" with her everywhere she goes.

                              I wish these schools would spend more time teaching boys how to clean a weapon and girls how to clean an oven.
                              I'd not even thought of it that way!

                              Perhaps we should torchvocally condemn this horrific act of sacrilege by these "school" teachers!

                                Comment

                                • Brother Temperance
                                  Senior Usher
                                  True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
                                  A very nice young man
                                  True Christian™
                                  • Sep 2006
                                  • 15621
                                  #9
                                  Re: Kristian Kids Art

                                  Originally posted by Carlton Green View Post
                                  Perhaps this is a good reason enough to rod him?
                                  I'd rod him anyway, just to be in the safe side. Maybe it's not a good enough reason, but if not, he's probably done something else sinful that you should be beating him for.
                                  O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



                                  God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

                                    Comment

                                    • SUV
                                      True Christian™ Princess
                                      The Driving Force behind RA12
                                      Have at it, anytime!
                                      • Sep 2006
                                      • 11027
                                      #10
                                      Re: Kristian Kids Art

                                      God has been so Gracious as to grant me the Visage of that really hunky Brother Green again. And...and...he is being Concerned with the Children!!!

                                        Comment

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