Demonized Chair Butt Rapes Teen and Kills Him!

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

This chink boy was probably listening to his IPOD when demons entered his rear through his chair and KILLED him dead!

This is but one example of how rock and roll will send you to HELL. This boy might be lucky however, he now has no anus for Satan to rape for all eternity (Satan will probably use an ear or an eye socket I heard he is creative that way).

PARENTS LET THIS BE A WARNING!

http://www.thetoyzone.com/2009/blog/boy-killed-by-anal-penetrating-chair/

[Nobar King]

Re: Demonized Chair Butt Rapes Teen and Kills Him!

I just went and checked all of my chairs and I have a few desk chairs with pneumatic lifts. I'm going to fashion a shield out of sheet metal to put on my favorite one to protect myself, and throw out the rest. Thanks for bringing this to my attention.

[Oakland "Reb" Griner]

Re: Demonized Chair Butt Rapes Teen and Kills Him!

Ewww.


Regarding the prior occurrence:

I suspect the survivor must be a homer to have survived the compressed gas propelled spindle intrusion.

[David Goldman]

Re: Demonized Chair Butt Rapes Teen and Kills Him!

I found the original article HERE and it has a little more information. The boy was at the computer, so I wonder what kind of website he happened to be surfing at the time, hmm?

And it gets more bizarre -- it took the father over an hour to get to the hospital, and by that time it was too late. Further, they said that there were 3 OTHER cases just like that at that same hospital in Jiaozhou City in the last month alone. And surprise surprise, the chair was made in China.

So yeh lots of good lessons here, like don't leave your kids home alone, don't sit so much, don't surf naughty websites, and always buy American. Oh, and take notice if a bunch of chairs in the neighborhood start exploding -- because that could be important . . .

[Oakland "Reb" Griner]

Re: Demonized Chair Butt Rapes Teen and Kills Him!

Perhaps it is for the best the lad did not survive.

With all the attention required to repair his mangled anus, he undoubtedly would have been homersixualized anyhow.

[Christiansoldier]

Re: Demonized Chair Butt Rapes Teen and Kills Him!

I bet if cummubama brought his UHC into play and another situation like this happened, the government would pay OUR money to save the guy! Ha! What a joke!

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: Demonized Chair Butt Rapes Teen and Kills Him!

HERE

Thank you for the link but it's all in Gook demon speak.

Ching chong ting dang tong..........

[David Goldman]

Re: Demonized Chair Butt Rapes Teen and Kills Him!

Thank you for the link but it's all in Gook demon speak.

Yes, sorry about that. I was forced to learn it, as the company that I work for has to deal with them on a constant basis, and since their "engrish" is like backmasking from an old scratched Led Zepplin vinyl played at 78rpm. We don't trust them anyway even when we can understand them, so I have to do the translation thing when they try to get too sneaky.

It is my thorn in the flesh, but God's way of keeping me humbled. Even as my ears bleed, my eyes blur, and my tongue burns; I celebrate His Goodness of keeping my soul purified through the pain of the flesh.