Yawning during prayer

[EvilSire]

Re: Yawning during prayer

I think the proper way to do things is to yawn every other word and every 3rd syllable.

[Timothy Ackworth]

Re: Yawning during prayer

When I first read the title, I hoped that it would only have been kids, as they do get distracted quite easily (still not an excuse though, but it would have explained it). But knowing that your wife is yawning while listening to the holy words of God himself...that seems unacceptable, however, is this the first time that you have caught her doing this? If it is, I say that you should have a serious discussion with her, and if this an often occurrence, you definitely need to tell her to get her priorities straight, if you don't want to be alone in Heaven.

We all know that divorcing her is NOT an option "What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate," - Mark 10:9, however I believe that it is not a part of God's plan to set up a good Christian man with a woman who does not take God serious "When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out from his house,..." - Deuteronomy 24:1

[SpawnOfAzreal]

Re: Yawning during prayer

My wife has done this before; well, at least I suspected she had (I looked at her and her lips were apart).

My punishment for her tiredness was to not let her sleep for 72 hours, and instead stay in the "naughty cage" I keep next to my garden shed. GOD blessed me and sent down some terrible weather, and she hasn't yawned since!

Oh do be careful when using things like that.
You wouldn't want to give people the idea you're doing some horribly sinful activity like BDSM sex
They don't even use it for reproduction! They have sex for their ill-mannered and absolutely, horrifically disgusting idea of "pleasure"

I'm linking the image to save any young folk who could be swayed away from the Path of Christ and from being a True Christian.
But should you cage your woman, and I dare not say you should not as it is your right to discipline her as is your will, you may give the impression you're one of THESE horrible deviants from the Path of Christ.
Be careful good sir.

[The Light]

Re: Yawning during prayer

Hitting her with a baseball bat comes to mind. Also it is a sign of laziness. So she clearly needs less sleep and more hard work.

Proverbs 12:24 "The hand of the diligent will rule, But the lazy will be put to forced labor."

Maybe you are the one who needs to be struck with a bat. REPEATEDLY. Do you christian extremists/bigots ever think that people have bad days? Do not tell me every day is good when you let the Lord into your life either, I'm being serious. Maybe his wife was just tired from something, there is no reason she should be punished for it.

[Zechariah Smyth]

Re: Yawning during prayer

I think you have to look at these things in context. For instance, my wife yawned in church one time, but she had put in a 16'X24' cedar deck the day before, so I let it slide.



YiC,

Zech

[WinnerNotSinner]

Re: Yawning during prayer

My wife has done this before; well, at least I suspected she had (I looked at her and her lips were apart).

My punishment for her tiredness was to not let her sleep for 72 hours, and instead stay in the "naughty cage" I keep next to my garden shed. GOD blessed me and sent down some terrible weather, and she hasn't yawned since!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Yawning during prayer

I'll tell you what; if I catch anyone yawning during one of my sermons, I'll come right down from the pulpit and beat them like a rented mule.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Yawning during prayer

Perhaps she needs to be reminded how much she loves the Lord.



Keep them apart for a month or so. Leave her home when you go to church. Dont allow her to pray at table and keep her away from the Bible.

Deny her all True Christian activities. Keep her away from her Church family. See how she likes that!!

I think that'll punish her pretty good, and by the end of it she'll be yearning to be back in the Arms of Jesus.

Of course, if you deny her Christian fellowship too long, she might backslide, and go to hell. But that's a risk worth considering, isn't it? Besides, in that case she was never a True Christian anyway.

This is a woman, Brother. Without constant reinforcement, she could backslide within the week, and become a pole-dancing harlot giving handjobs for crack like unsaved women do!



Perhaps after withholding her from her church family for a couple of weeks, she should come to Indiana and visit with the wonderful folks of my congregation. Widow Helen could teach her some new tricks, I'm sure!

In the kitchen, of course.

[JustGotSaved]

Re: Yawning during prayer

Perhaps she needs to be reminded how much she loves the Lord.



Keep them apart for a month or so. Leave her home when you go to church. Dont allow her to pray at table and keep her away from the Bible.

Deny her all True Christian activities. Keep her away from her Church family. See how she likes that!!

I think that'll punish her pretty good, and by the end of it she'll be yearning to be back in the Arms of Jesus.

Of course, if you deny her Christian fellowship too long, she might backslide, and go to hell. But that's a risk worth considering, isn't it? Besides, in that case she was never a True Christian anyway.

[Titus Templeton]

Re: Yawning during prayer

It's up to you Brother, she has to do what you say.
Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
Ephesians 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

She gives my feeds a massage for the next hour(s).
Its good to be a Christian.

[John Creeser]

Re: Yawning during prayer

Today i found my wife yawning during her prayer.

If she made a noise, it's the same as a woman talking in church - this simply is not allowed.

1st Corinthians 14:34 Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience, as also saith the law.

What should I do?

It's up to you Brother, she has to do what you say.

Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
Ephesians 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

When Abigail spoke in Church I had her report to Pastor Ezekiel for intensive Bible study. Not sure why this was from 11 at night till 7 in the morning, but who am I to question.

Anyway, in church, she's kept her yap shut ever since.

[James Hutchins]

Re: Yawning during prayer

No one in my family ever has yawned during prayer. However, one of my daughters 'queefed' during a Sermon once. The ladies of Landover apparently resolved the 'womens problem'. Something about sewing her lips shut. I never understood it as she still was capable I speaking, if memory serves.

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Yawning during prayer

Today i found my wife yawning during her prayer.
What should I do?

Are you sure it was yawning, not "silent speaking in tongues."?

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Yawning during prayer

Today i found my wife yawning during her prayer. What should I do?

Hitting her with a baseball bat comes to mind. Also it is a sign of laziness. So she clearly needs less sleep and more hard work.

Proverbs 12:24 "The hand of the diligent will rule, But the lazy will be put to forced labor."

[Titus Templeton]

Today i found my wife yawning during her prayer.
What should I do?