[Sister Kitty]

Re: God won't allow global warming

i respectfully disagree. that is why i ride bicycles and when i need to i carpool. i do own an electric car but i feel bad driving it when so many people are suffering all over the world.

Perhaps they would suffer less if you did not subject them to the sight of a pretend man in a pretend car.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: God won't allow global warming

that is none of your business mister! i am myself

Since you didn't say "no" it seems you are gay indeed. Please stop being gay, God hates it!

[John Smith]

Re: God won't allow global warming

that is none of your business mister! i am myself.

the middle ages was a horrible period in the earths history and it had a lot to do with christians oppressing the rest of the world like they are trying to do now. thankfully there were muslims to help stop it. sorry.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: God won't allow global warming

i respectfully disagree. that is why i ride bicycles and when i need to i carpool. i do own an electric car but i feel bad driving it when so many people are suffering all over the world.

Are you gay?

Why you should stop being gay: Romans 1:26-27 "For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature: And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet."

[True Disciple]

Re: God won't allow global warming

the middle ages was also caused by man.

What? How could they possibly do that?

[John Smith]

Re: God won't allow global warming

i respectfully disagree. that is why i ride bicycles and when i need to i carpool. i do own an electric car but i feel bad driving it when so many people are suffering all over the world.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: God won't allow global warming

global climate change is real. it is difficult for me to believe some members here can doubt it. man caused it not god. sorry.

Why do you believe scientists who admitted to lying about this already on many occasions? Just Google climategate! PROOF scientists are liars (The Times).

[John Smith]

Re: God won't allow global warming

the middle ages was also caused by man.

[True Disciple]

Re: God won't allow global warming

global climate change is real. it is difficult for me to believe some members here can doubt it. man caused it not god. sorry.

What? How do you know that? Just because we have some anomalies the last years does not mean that the climate is changing! There have been much warmer periods in the recent past, like the Middle Ages, for example. The climate changes because God knows that we, as humans, like some variety in the weather. The climate is not changing. Why do you think it always snows during climate conferences? That is God giving hints; He wants us to abandon this silly nonsense.

[John Smith]

Re: God won't allow global warming

global climate change is real. it is difficult for me to believe some members here can doubt it. man caused it not god. sorry.

[Brother Enoch]

Re: God won't allow global warming

No, I didn't, but I mean, oh, nevermind I knew what I meant. One day God is going to give the world one big slap up side the head and all those that aren't with him will be wiped from the earth.

Um, yeah, we know that.

Any other incisive observations you'd like to share?

[black_Jew_Licorice]

Re: God won't allow global warming

Everything is a precursor to Armageddon. Did you ride the short bus to school?

No, I didn't, but I mean, oh, nevermind I knew what I meant. One day God is going to give the world one big slap up side the head and all those that aren't with him will be wiped from the earth.

[Brother Enoch]

Re: God won't allow global warming

God will allow Global Warming. It's just the precursor to Armageddon.

Everything is a precursor to Armageddon. Did you ride the short bus to school?

[black_Jew_Licorice]

Re: God won't allow global warming

God will allow Global Warming. It's just the precursor to Armageddon.

[Free Market Fred]

Re: God won't allow global warming

Within 1200 kilometers of us are 4 other eskimo villages. The eskimos that live in these villages are sadly unsaved. We intend to send gifts of cesium-137, strontium-90, and iodine-131 to them for them to distribute amongst themselves during their pagan spring rituals, along with a KJV Bible which will hopefully bring them closer to the Lord. If it doesn't, the isotopes should.

Hopefully, nothing will happen to these simple villagers, however if something unexpected were to happen and they all perished due to some natural disaster, our tribe would inherit all their lands and more than quadruple our holdings. Were this to happen, we can perhaps arrange a new deal with Uranus corporation, involving the vast sum of several more large logs. And perhaps ebola virus, as well.

I have great news, Sister Kitty. My company has been awarded contracts to develop both vaccines for protecting our troops against germ warfare, and developing germ warfare microbes (purely defensive, you understand). Right now we've already completed the testing on rats and chimpanzees with good results, and we're ready to begin testing on human volunteers. If I understand you correctly, you're volunteering the other villages for our ebola and anthrax research programs. We will need to get those villagers to sign wavers, but I'm sure that a little persuasion from your tribe along with copious quantities of booze, Valium and the low level of literacy will produce the necessary signatures. Then we can begin.

At this point we can begin to discuss big ticket items, like canoes, rifles, tactical nuclear weapons, snowmobiles and outboard motors.

It brings a tear to my eye to see that your tribe is ready to give up their primitive customs, and adopt the American way of life. In no time at all, you'll be abandoning those dog sleds for SUVs and motor homes. Your people will happily spend their evenings watching Fox News while enjoying 4000-calorie bags of Cheetos, six-packs of Budweiser and unlimited bottles of Prozac, all of which you can charge to your Visa cards at 29% compound interest (until you miss a payment and then the rate quadruples). At least until the type 2 diabetes sets in and ruins your eyesight, I'm sure you'll enjoy your weekends shooting at stop signs and empty beer bottles.


Enjoying the American way of life.

My lawyers are drawing up the contracts just now as I write. This is truly a historic day, one that you and your people will never forget.