Size Matters

[HTannor]

All right, folks, it's time to whip them out to see if your State measures up.

The Godly Republican Party of Iowa™ has published its party platform for 2010 and it runs 64 pages and contains 11,722 words. If your state has a bigger one, here's your chance to show it off.

Among the provisions, Iowa has bared it all by including provisions that are “red meat” for true Republicans:


-We believe abortion should be illegal.

-We call for the abolition of the Federal Department of Agriculture.

-We call for the repeal of all mandatory minimum wage laws.

-We call for the elimination of the Federal agency, Occupational Safety and Health Administration (OSHA).

-We support the elimination of the U.S. Department of Education.

-We believe that Intelligent Design theory, or Creationism, should be included with all science instruction along with the Darwinian Theory.

-The use of the Bible as a textbook should be allowed.

-We oppose the teaching of homosexual behavior as a normal or acceptable lifestyle in our public schools.

-We support exploration and drilling for oil and natural gas in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge and the outer continental shelf.

-We call for the abolition of the U.S. Department of Energy.

-We support an amendment to both the U. S. that states that all marriages should be traditional one natural male and one natural female, omitting transgendered.

-We believe that pornography is not included under the protections of the First Amendment.

-We demand full restoration of 2nd Amendment rights and call for a state law authorizing law-abiding citizens to carry firearms, open or concealed, without a permit.

-We support the public display of the Ten Commandments.

-We resolve that church representatives and pastors be allowed to speak on any subject from Scripture, whether moral or political, at any time without disturbing the 501c3 status of the church.

-We believe that health care is a privilege and not a right. Therefore we strongly oppose any mandatory national health care system including managed care.

-We believe that bequeathing citizenship to babies born to illegal aliens in the United States is a misinterpretation of the 14th amendment.

-We believe that the term “assault weapon” should not be used as a term applicable to a semiautomatic weapon.

-We support “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell.”

-We support the abolition of the IRS.

-We call for the elimination of the Endowment to the Arts.


Iowa is a Godly State™ and if your wimpy state can measure up, tell us what your Republican Party has done.

I dare you.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Size Matters

Indiana's is only 20 pages long, but that's because we know how to be concise and not mince words.

How do you like these apples, Tannor?

We believe that the First Amendment guarantees freedom of religion, not freedom from religion. We do not support court ordered mandates that banish prayer from public forums.

Artful language, no?

We are supportive of “faith-based initiatives”

We understand and support the Second Amendment to the United States

We support the millennia old concept of marriage as a union between a woman and a man

We understand that individual responsibility is a prerequisite for the preservation of freedom. Every individual must be responsible for his or her actions

Indiana Republicans commend Secretary of State Todd Rokita in his successful efforts in support of Indiana’s voter identification law, which was upheld by the Supreme Court of the United States.

Then a bunch of stuff about economic development and such.

We stand in full support of Attorney General Greg Zoeller, who has joined at least 20 other states in a lawsuit challenging the constitutionality of the new health care law. We support the repeal of Obamacare.

We must elect Republicans to Congress to fix this mess. The Indiana Republican Party believes that health care costs need to be controlled and that health insurance should be available to Americans who have a viable alternative today. We believe the bill passed by Congress and signed by the president will have no positive impact on the affordability of either care or insurance. Indiana Republicans firmly that this big-government boondoggle needs to be repealed and replaced with free-market alternatives. This replacement package should tort reform, insurance portability, and a focus on Health Savings Accounts (HSAs). It must also protect seniors’ Medicare welfare benefits.

We stand opposed to the “cap and trade” legislation before Congress. “Cap and trade” will tax companies who do not meet strict environmental mandates to which other countries will not submit, sacrificing Hoosier jobs for negligible results.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: Size Matters

Montana's packs a lot of punch into a few words:

The Montana Republican Party supports fair and equal enforcement of our criminal laws.

* * *

We support the clear will of the people of Montana expressed by legislation to keep homosexual acts illegal.

* * *

We recognize that a significant problem exists with Montana's current laws regarding the medical use of marijuana and we support action by the next legislature to amend or repeal the Medical Marijuana Act.

America-haters have said that since Montana voters approved the Medical Marijuana Act by a wide margin, the Montana GOP is contradicting itself. That's just the sort of twisted logic that we've come to expect from lie-berals. Sodomy laws don't affect any fundamental liberties; medical marijuana violates my fundamental liberty as a True Christian™ Republican to live in a society free from whatever I disapprove of.