[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Michelle Bachman May Join Landover Baptist

Amen, Mayor Joe Hold!

Say...

Have you ever considered running for president?

My goodness. That's so nice.

Being President could not be as exciting as being Mayor of the most Godly City in the world.

But, thanks for asking.

JJH

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Michelle Bachman May Join Landover Baptist

It would be a great sacrifice, and a terrible test of your faith, because presidential candidates are forced to consort with all kinds of unsavory types, and to mince words for fear of offending voters.

Still, I think your country needs you.

[Nathan B. Forrest]

Re: Michelle Bachman May Join Landover Baptist

I mean, the correct answer to a question, "Will you be submissive to your husband is you are elected Presidient of the United States?" is simply YES.

No complicated answer about respect this and respect that is needed.

I can't believe we're even discussing this point...why would she NOT be submissive - unless there's something out there we don't know about...

[Free Market Fred]

Re: Michelle Bachman May Join Landover Baptist

It's likely that she skipped a visit to Freehold because of a misunderstanding between her husband and myself.

Too bad you didn't get to meet him, he's actually a fun-loving guy. I met him over here in Cambodia - I've seen him snort enough coke mixed with Viagra to kill an elephant. Anyway, I can attest that he's not exclusively gay - he seems to like the little boys and little girls equally. That's why he adopted 23 of them. Plus that "gay conversion" business he runs is a perfect cover - I mean if you want to have gay orgies, how better to recruit participants than a business like that?

Michelle, on the other hand, is totally straight, though she once performed a couple of girl-on-girl stunts in a backroom with Ann Coulter and Nancy Grace at a abstinence-only fundraising party, but it was just to keep her hubby happy. I enjoyed watching the video (which Marcus keeps on his laptop computer), but I've advised him to be really careful with it, lest it fall into the wrong hands.


Nancy Grace, another skillful conservative "mouthpiece"

I don't know if it's divine inspiration or what, but Michelle is amazingly skillful with that mouth of hers. Way back when she was a college student, she was so popular with the male faculty that they named "Oral" Roberts University after her. When she worked at the IRS, the staff gave her the nickname Eureka, an old brand-name vacuum cleaner. It was said Michelle could suck a golf ball through a garden hose. She was also real popular with the guys at the Operation Rescue demonstrations - they used to do her on lunch breaks in the back of an old Winnebago they nicknamed Afternoon Delight.


Makes you feel like shouting "Hallelujah!"

Of course, at age 55 and now just past menopause, she's no longer in heat, which is probably a good thing seeing how presidents are expected to be chaste. No chance of her getting knocked-up again either, since her surgeon finally removed her battered ovaries after her 12th abortion. She is thinking of visiting her gynecologist one last time for a virginity-restoration operation, though fitting an artificial hymen that size might be a little tricky.

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Michelle Bachman May Join Landover Baptist

One question, Fred: When Mr. Michele Bachmann snorted coke and Viagra, did you immediately rebuke him?

I certainly hope so!

[Free Market Fred]

Re: Michelle Bachman May Join Landover Baptist

One question, Fred: When Mr. Michele Bachmann snorted coke and Viagra, did you immediately rebuke him?

I certainly hope so!

I certainly did! You can't believe how expensive coke is in Cambodia! More importantly, it's often cut with all sorts of dangerous chemicals, everything from ecstasy to drain-pipe cleaner. Asia is the wrong continent for that stuff - it all comes from South America.


At least it keeps your nostrils clean

You know, it's like they say, "When in Rome, do as the Romans do." Marcus would have been much wiser to mix his Viagra with heroin or meth - cheap as aspirin in these parts, and 100% quality.

[JonnaJacobsen]

Re: Michelle Bachman May Join Landover Baptist

No she won't... And you guys know that too...

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Michelle Bachman May Join Landover Baptist

No she won't... And you guys know that too...

Jonna--I don't know why you would be such a pessimist. There is always hope people will find Jesus and become better Christians.

In Mrs. Bachman's case, she retains some liberal views, did not belong to a True Christian™ church, but now has the opportunity to improve herself. She could right now state clearly she will be a submissive wife and apply for membership in LBC.

Who's to say she could not meaure up?

[James Hutchins]

Re: Michelle Bachman May Join Landover Baptist

I hope Mrs. Bachman does join Landover, a few of the LOL social groups could use a fresh face and some new recipes.

I did not want to say anything but the brownies I had after Church last Sunday appeared to have lawn clippings in them. You would think after four I would not be hungry but I was ravenous.

[HTannor]

Re: Michelle Bachman May Join Landover Baptist

Those filthy, lying lieberals are at it again.

Another Bachmannism: The American People are Worried About “The Rise of the Soviet Union”


By Marie Diamond on Aug 18, 2011 at 4:50 pm


Of all the candidates vying for the GOP presidential nomination, Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-MN) perhaps has the most colorful record of flubbing historical facts. Just this week, she wished Elvis Presley a happy birthday …on the day he died. But today, on the right-wing Christian attorney Jay Sekulow’s radio show, the congresswoman evinced a far more disturbing lack of basic knowledge about world history.

Specifically, Bachmann said the American people are worried about "the rise of the Soviet Union.“

Apparently no one’s told her that America’s one-time Cold War nemesis has not existed for 20 years:

BACHMANN: What people recognize is that there’s a fear that the United States is in an unstoppable decline. They see the rise of China, the rise of India, the rise of the Soviet Union and our loss militarily going forward. And especially with this very bad debt ceiling bill, what we have done is given a favor to President Obama and the first thing he’ll whack is five hundred billion out of the military defense at a time when we’re fighting three wars. People recognize that.
Source:
http://thinkprogress.org/politics/20...et-union-flub/

The lovely Michele speaks the truth. We all know those dirty commies are just laying low, waiting to rise again.

Michele is clearly out front on this issue.

[Fags Die God Laughs]

Re: Michelle Bachman May Join Landover Baptist

Bachman needs to shut up and stay in the kitchen! God said it's a woman's place to be submissive to men! Ain't gonna have no stinking apple eating whore be my president!

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Michelle Bachman May Join Landover Baptist

Bachman needs to shut up and stay in the kitchen! God said it's a woman's place to be submissive to men! Ain't gonna have no stinking apple eating whore be my president!

Please introduce yourself in the introduction forum. Include information about your relationship with Jesus, the name of your church, your pastor's name, and how many sons God has blessed you with, along with a lurid and detailed list of any and all sins you may have committed in the past.

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Michelle Bachman May Join Landover Baptist

I would like to know what Bachmann means about "our loss militarily going forward." Ours is the mightiest, most well-equipped, most God-favored military in human history. The only time we've ever come close to losing a war was when the wet-blanket peaceniks convinced us to call a truce in Vietnam.

[knob polisher]

Re: Michelle Bachman May Join Landover Baptist

I heard her husband likes to tiptoe through the tulips

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Michelle Bachman May Join Landover Baptist

I heard her husband likes to tiptoe through the tulips

I can see how you would be confused, son. Any other man who let his wife wear the pants in the family would obviously be the pearl-clutching, tulip-tiptoing, subservient spouse at home, but in this case you're mistaken. You see, God personally called her to run for the presidency, so it's not gay.