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  • Pastor Ezekiel
    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
     
    • Sep 2006
    • 78556

    #1

    Marines Spit on Jesus

    This story is unbelievable. Have the homers completely taken over the Godly U.S. Marine Corps? Frankly, I blame the Clintons for this entire mess.

    Toys for Tots Rejects Jesus Doll
    Associated Press

    LOS ANGELES, Nov 14 - A talking Jesus doll has been turned down by the Marine Reserves' Toys for Tots program.

    A Los Angeles company offered to donate 4,000 of the 1 foot-(30 centimeter)-tall dolls, which quote Bible verses, for distribution to needy children this holiday season. The battery-powered Jesus is one of several dolls manufactured by one2believe, a division of the Valencia-based Beverly Hills Teddy Bear Co., based on Biblical figures.

    But the charity balked because of the dolls' religious nature.

    Toys are donated to kids based on financial need and "we don't know anything about their background, their religious affiliations," said Bill Grein, vice president of Marine Toys for Tots Foundation, in Quantico, Va.

    As a government entity, Marines "don't profess one religion over another," Grein said Tuesday. "We can't take a chance on sending a talking Jesus doll to a Jewish family or a Muslim family."

    Michael La Roe, director of business development for both companies, said the charity's decision left him "surprised and disappointed."

    "The idea was for them to be three-dimensional teaching tools for kids," La Roe said. "I believe as a churchgoing person, anyone can benefit from hearing the words of the Bible."

    According to the company's Web site, the button-activated, bearded Jesus, dressed in hand-sewn cloth outfits and sandals, recites Scripture such as "I tell you the truth, no one can see the kingdom of God unless he is born again" and "Love your neighbor as yourself." It has a $20 (euro15.60) retail value.

    Grein questioned whether children would welcome a gift designed for religious instruction. "Kids want a gift for the holiday season that is fun," he said.
    What is this Grein fellow talking about? How could a talking Jesus doll NOT be fun!? Sounds like a jew talking to me. Mr. LaRoe is 100% correct! All the world could benefit from hearing a Jesus action figure (not a doll!!) tell them what to do in order to gain Salvation™, especially yids and mudslimes.

    This Godly line up of Biblical action figures (not dolls!!) are excellent, with the one exception that they should have made Jesus' hair blonde, as it was in real life! Anyway, I would be proud to give these as Christmas gifts. And I am ashamed of the homers that are currently running the name of the United States Marines into the mud.
    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
  • Pastor Al E Pistle
    Christ's Cōnsiliārius
     
    • Sep 2006
    • 9323

    #2
    Re: Marines Spit on Jesus

    Well, I'm sorry to disagree, but the Marines need REAL HE-MAN action figures that depict the coming glory of Christ's return to help recruitment efforts.
    Attached Files
    Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
    "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
    Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


    Comment

    • Rachael Van Helsing
      HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
      • Sep 2006
      • 5131

      #3
      Re: Marines Spit on Jesus

      I for one am glad they did not accept them. For they are right, it is unfair to give xtian toys to families that aren't xtian. How would you like it if someone gave your family Buddhist toys?
      sigpic
      Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!

      Comment

      • Pastor Ezekiel
        Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
         
        • Sep 2006
        • 78556

        #4
        Re: Marines Spit on Jesus

        Originally posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
        I for one am glad they did not accept them. For they are right, it is unfair to give xtian toys to families that aren't xtian. How would you like it if someone gave your family Buddhist toys?
        What on earth would a "buddhast toy" be? All they do is bang sticks together and moan all day while bowing down to their fat chink cultgod.
        Who Will Jesus Damn?

        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

        Comment

        • Rachael Van Helsing
          HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
          • Sep 2006
          • 5131

          #5
          Re: Marines Spit on Jesus

          I don't know, a stuffed Buddha doll or something? But that's beside the point! The point being, how would you like it if someone gave your family a Buddha doll, would you be happy?
          sigpic
          Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!

          Comment

          • Pastor Ezekiel
            Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
             
            • Sep 2006
            • 78556

            #6
            Re: Marines Spit on Jesus

            Originally posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
            I don't know, a stuffed Buddha doll or something? But that's beside the point! The point being, how would you like it if someone gave your family a Buddha doll, would you be happy?
            My dogs would love something like that...It would sharpen their skills at rebuking.

            That is a fine idea...LBC could come out with a line of dog toys shaped like cult gods and witches, the better to Praise Jesus with. Thanks VanHellover.
            Who Will Jesus Damn?

            Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

            Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

            Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

            Comment

            • Brother Temperance
              Senior Usher
              True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
              A very nice young man
              True Christian™
              • Sep 2006
              • 15621

              #7
              Re: Marines Spit on Jesus

              Originally posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
              I don't know, a stuffed Buddha doll or something? But that's beside the point! The point being, how would you like it if someone gave your family a Buddha doll, would you be happy?
              Your analogy is completely false! You cannot compare Christ dolls to chinee Satan dolls. That's like comparing finding a shiny penny to being viciously buggered.
              O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



              God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

              Comment

              • Talitha
                Deaconess
                Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
                True Christian™
                • Nov 2026
                • 15118

                #8
                Re: Marines Spit on Jesus

                Originally posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
                I don't know, a stuffed Buddha doll or something? But that's beside the point! The point being, how would you like it if someone gave your family a Buddha doll, would you be happy?
                I've got just the one for you Hellflingerlingervonclinker:

                Click image for larger version

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                Sister Talitha

                Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


                HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
                being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



                Comment

                • Remy Lebeau
                  LBU Professor and Biblical Wordsmith Extraordinaire
                  President of the Ex-Negro Academy Alumni Association
                  Freehold Best Tan Award winner, 10 yrs running
                  True Christian™
                  • Sep 2006
                  • 2058

                  #9
                  Re: Marines Spit on Jesus

                  Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                  I don't know, pastor...

                  From left to right:

                  Looks like some dirty border crossing "Hay-Zeus" Christ who'd be prophesying outside of a Californian Office Depot.

                  Looks like some sissy nancy boy feMALEan pre-opt fudge packer like that Darren-Myers she-feller.

                  Looks like some homer greek male dancer who works in the local bathhouse totting a pair of balls in his hands.

                  Looks like some old negro who should be sitting on a porch telling Uncle Remus tales to the local blonde haired blue eyed children of his mast employer.

                  Looks like some harlot motioning unsaved men towards her worn out extremities. The blank soulless stare is the only biblically accurate feature demonstrating a woman of biblical times.

                  The marines may have given one excuse to keep the demoncrap secularist heathens off their backs, but perhaps the real reason they wouldn't taken them is because those toys make a mockery of Jesus, His Prophets, and the various God-fearing baby ovens mentioned in the Bible.
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                  Comment

                  • Rachael Van Helsing
                    HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
                    • Sep 2006
                    • 5131

                    #10
                    Re: Marines Spit on Jesus

                    Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                    My dogs would love something like that...It would sharpen their skills at rebuking.

                    That is a fine idea...LBC could come out with a line of dog toys shaped like cult gods and witches, the better to Praise Jesus with. Thanks VanHellover.
                    On that line of thinking, if I get anyone giving me any biblical dolls, they are going straight to Daisy and Raptor. They're getting tired of their old chew toys.

                    Your analogy is completely false! You cannot compare Christ dolls to chinee Satan dolls. That's like comparing finding a shiny penny to being viciously buggered.
                    How?
                    They are both dolls representing a particular belief. Just a different belief. I'm not even going to start with what's wrong with your example!
                    sigpic
                    Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!

                    Comment

                    • Brother Temperance
                      Senior Usher
                      True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
                      A very nice young man
                      True Christian™
                      • Sep 2006
                      • 15621

                      #11
                      Re: Marines Spit on Jesus

                      Originally posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
                      How?
                      They are both dolls representing a particular belief. Just a different belief. I'm not even going to start with what's wrong with your example!
                      One of them is a doll representing the Saviour of Mankind; the other depicts the Father of Lies with a beer belly and a chink mask. Even you should be able to spot the difference. You're not even going to start with what's wrong with my example because there is nothing wrong with it.
                      O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



                      God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

                      Comment

                      • Glendora Christianson
                        Spiritual Mother of LBC
                        True Christian™
                        • Sep 2006
                        • 2329

                        #12
                        Re: Marines Spit on Jesus

                        Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                        This story is unbelievable. Have the homers completely taken over the Godly U.S. Marine Corps? Frankly, I blame the Clintons for this entire mess.
                        My husband Elmer and I have been concerned about the Marines for quite some time. Several years ago, we investigated the Marines because our son Skeeter wanted to join. Elmer and I were very alarmed to find that the Marines participate in kweer gang showers on a daily basis. Because of this, we urged our son to join the Selective Services branch of the US Military as they do not incorporate gang showers and they never grope or probe young men as other branches of the military do.
                        Attached Files
                        Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.

                        Comment

                        • Rachael Van Helsing
                          HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
                          • Sep 2006
                          • 5131

                          #13
                          Re: Marines Spit on Jesus

                          What you believe is a belief. Plain and simple. It is YOUR way, not the only way. And whether or not you choose to admit it, not everyone believes the same as you.
                          If you get xtian dolls, Buddhists should get Buddha dolls. Or I, Pagan dolls (except that the idea would be a little silly except the kiddies might like it)
                          sigpic
                          Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!

                          Comment

                          • Brother Temperance
                            Senior Usher
                            True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
                            A very nice young man
                            True Christian™
                            • Sep 2006
                            • 15621

                            #14
                            Re: Marines Spit on Jesus

                            Originally posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
                            What you believe is a belief. Plain and simple. It is YOUR way, not the only way. And whether or not you choose to admit it, not everyone believes the same as you.
                            If you get xtian dolls, Buddhists should get Buddha dolls. Or I, Pagan dolls (except that the idea would be a little silly except the kiddies might like it)
                            And what about Catlicks? Should they get child porn paid for by taxpayers' money?
                            O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



                            God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

                            Comment

                            • Rachael Van Helsing
                              HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
                              • Sep 2006
                              • 5131

                              #15
                              Re: Marines Spit on Jesus

                              Originally posted by Brother Temperance View Post
                              And what about Catlicks? Should they get child porn paid for by taxpayers' money?
                              Hmm, good point.

                              That isn't what I meant though. Personally, I lean more towards no religious toys at all, because if you acknowldge one, it's only fair to bring out products for all the others. And the last thing we need is more crappy products to flood an already over saturated market.
                              sigpic
                              Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!

                              Comment

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