[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: Is Touching Yourself Worth an Eternity in HELL?

Want proof that GOD will smite those who play with themselves?

GOD sent an alligator to chomp this young man hands off! you "play" you pay!

http://www.animalseatinganimals.com/2010/07/alligator-eats-boys-hand-clean-off-in.html

[handmaiden]

Re: Is Touching Yourself Worth an Eternity in HELL?

I guess the sense of humour is lost on you guys

oh look who made a funny..
looks like this place isnt as dry as i thought

Perhaps we do have a sense of humor, however this forum isn't about just making a few cheep jokes.

Ha. Ha. Ha. You are going to burn eternally in hell. Funny stuff, eh?

There is nothing funny about the threat of hell. We are here, opening our hearts to offer you a glimpse of the Truth as presented in the Bible. The Bible ain't a giggle fest, my friend.

God has many, many things to say in the Bible -- things about Himself and His true nature, things about the nature of mankind and how He would prefer that we behave, and things about what happens after this mortal realm.

An orgasm -(pardon me Brothers for being so painfully frank) can last for a minute or two. The sheer, agonzing pain of burning flame will last forever. The unconceived souls that are virtually pissed away will be screaming besides you. How can you do that to them? How can you throw away the chance to live eternally in the Light of Jesus and instead choose to endure unending scorching, skin-peeling, searing PAIN!?

When the urge to grab your own goods comes over you, light a match and let the flame burn down until it singes your fingers. Imagine that pain magnified a millionfold. You will find your answer. A burnt finger or two -or three-- is better than an abused-- self-abused -- tallywacker and an eternity of engulfing flame--(which is never funny to the engulfee, though perhaps entertaining for any spectators about).

helpfully yours,

Handmaiden

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: Is Touching Yourself Worth an Eternity in HELL?

I think we need to have a Pastor go down to Paper Tiger XXX Adult shop on Indian Scalped Road and have an intervention with the men who plan on going in and watching the girls dance and then spilling their seed on the floor. Just imagine all the baby sperm souls just stuck there on the sticky floor and the bottom of Ming perverts shoes!

Someone needs to help these spermie children!

[The Hand]

Re: Is Touching Yourself Worth an Eternity in HELL?

You might want to take a little look at the forum title before you complain:

Landover to the Rescue - Christian Help Forum A Christian Help Forum led by Mother Glendora. Warning! Sometimes the Lord's advice is a hard pill to swallow.

[Godder]

Re: Is Touching Yourself Worth an Eternity in HELL?

Is this really the proper thing to be discussing in a Christian forum?

no its not, i can't believe how many masturbators are on this site
frankly it has me questioning how many people on here are true Christians.

[Seth Campbell]

Re: Is Touching Yourself Worth an Eternity in HELL?

Is this really the proper thing to be discussing in a Christian forum?

[Robert Jones]

Re: Is Touching Yourself Worth an Eternity in HELL?

Wow, so much ex masturbator in that forum. Dont deny the faq that you killed over 600 million human souls. No, its too late, you already killed, you go to hell. Dont pretend that it never happen, we recognize you as an ex masturbator. If ex mastubator are saved, then il make sure to be an ex mastubator for more then a week before my death and il be save too.

Praise Jesus!!!

We were born anew when we became True Christians™.

2 Corinthians 5:16-17: Wherefore henceforth know we no man after the flesh: yea, though we have known Christ after the flesh, yet now henceforth know we him no more: Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.

God will have His day with you.

[Sidoain]

Re: Is Touching Yourself Worth an Eternity in HELL?

Wow, so much ex masturbator in that forum. Dont deny the faq that you killed over 600 million human souls. No, its too late, you already killed, you go to hell. Dont pretend that it never happen, we recognize you as an ex masturbator. If ex mastubator are saved, then il make sure to be an ex mastubator for more then a week before my death and il be save too.

Praise Jesus!!!

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Is Touching Yourself Worth an Eternity in HELL?

oh look who made a funny..
looks like this place isnt as dry as i thought

Perhaps we do have a sense of humor, however this forum isn't about just making a few cheep jokes.

[Bruno]

Re: Is Touching Yourself Worth an Eternity in HELL?

Do you mean three opinions? Are you like a genie?

oh look who made a funny..
looks like this place isnt as dry as i thought

[Nobar King]

Re: Is Touching Yourself Worth an Eternity in HELL?

Learn to live and laugh dude. Let people have there opinions

Do you mean three opinions? Are you like a genie?

[The Hand]

Re: Is Touching Yourself Worth an Eternity in HELL?

Well ok then, if you want to giggle like schoolgirls in a serious discussion, I'll leave you to it.

Wake me up when these two second-rate Godmockers have departed.

[Bruno]

Re: Is Touching Yourself Worth an Eternity in HELL?

Look, this isn't a place for you two homers to get to know each other better.

This is a house of GOD. Show some respect.

Learn to live and laugh dude. Let people have there opinions

[The Hand]

Re: Is Touching Yourself Worth an Eternity in HELL?

Look, this isn't a place for you two homers to get to know each other better.

This is a house of GOD. Show some respect.

[Bruno]

Re: Is Touching Yourself Worth an Eternity in HELL?

I guess the sense of humour is lost on you guys

This thread is full of lulz