Winning the Lottery, Easy As It sounds?

[WinnerNotSinner]

Greetings Brothers and Sisters in Christ,

I was just walking home from Church today when I decided, as I always do, to pick up a copy of The Landoverian Times from the newsagents on Eisenhower Lane. I like to keep abreast of what's going on in America firstly, and then if there's something bad happening elsewhere I always enjoy a good laugh.

Anyway, I got home and my little darling opened the door; "Daddy!" she shouted, as I pushed her out the way and made my way to the kitchen. Like always I start getting pestered before I can even think.. "Daddy, I need some new writing books for school". I hate the materialistic attitude she has sometimes, so I told her I'm not throwing away money on something she doesn't need. I made my way to the Dining table to make myself comfortable and turned my 60" plasma television off, opened my paper and found a story that caught my eye:

"Wife mistakes £123million lottery winner's joy for a heart attack"

A WIFE thought her husband’s number was up as he tried to break the news of their £123million lottery win.
She mistook his excitement for a heart attack after the American couple scooped half the £246million Mega Millions rollover, the second largest jackpot in US history.

Jim, who has four children with Carolyn plus two from a previous marriage, added: “This is going to go generation after generation.
“My kids, my grandkids, great-grandkids and their kids will never have to worry.”

It caught my eye not because a woman got something wrong again, but because I clearly see that this was another example of GOD's work. Jim and his wife had pleased Our Almighty with their plans for many generations of children, and He had rewarded them greatly, Shout GLORY!

My point is that the fine upstanding True Christians™ of Freehold, GOD's favourite people, are pretty much guaranteed lottery wins, we can just pray for it! Now I know you're probably thinking what I did, "But you CAN'T do the lottery, stop loving money!" (Ecclesiastes 5:10).

I refute that and declare that I will only get rich because GOD has convinced me to do the lottery, because he wants to reward me for my generous tithing, strong parenting and brilliant backing vocals in the choir. Much like the story of Isaac in Genesis! (Genesis 26:12-14) Praise Him!

Anyway, I need to pick the right numbers from scripture, any ideas? Some atheists that haven't even won the lottery once themselves told me it's to do with luck and it doesn't matter what I choose - those idiots continue to crack me up, so naive.

[Janine Walker]

Re: Winning the Lottery, Easy As It sounds?

What a nice story, very heartwarming to all Christians. I'd pick the first however many numbers you come across today that the Lord puts in front of you. Considering I have never played the lottery I'm not quite sure how many numbers you would choose!

Either way, very heart warming piece and you sound like you have an adorable daughter!

In God We Lotto, Janine Walker

[James Hutchins]

Re: Winning the Lottery, Easy As It sounds?

Hmmm, this story troubles me. I see no mention of tithing the winnings to the Church. I know that is what God expected. See, I feel this was a test of their faith.

If they really loved God, they would of given Gods money to the LBC. He already had a job and was earning a living. Now he is going to quit, denying the world of his services, and encourage all his family for generations to come to be good for nothing.

If we all pray real hard, perhaps we can get this no gooder off the Earth at at Gods Judgment, when surely he will be tossed to Hell.

[BelieverInGod]

Re: Winning the Lottery, Easy As It sounds?

Hmmm, this story troubles me. I see no mention of tithing the winnings to the Church. I know that is what God expected. See, I feel this was a test of their faith.

If they really loved God, they would of given Gods money to the LBC. He already had a job and was earning a living. Now he is going to quit, denying the world of his services, and encourage all his family for generations to come to be good for nothing.

If we all pray real hard, perhaps we can get this no gooder off the Earth at at Gods Judgment, when surely he will be tossed to Hell.

Well sickular studies have found that the majority of lottery winners are poorer 2 years after their win than they were in the first place, so I think your idea of a test is right. If they love God and follow God's law, they will continue to be blessed, if they fail the test, it will be taken away from them.

Luke 12:48 ... For unto whomsoever much is given, of him shall be much required: and to whom men have committed much, of him they will ask the more.

[WinnerNotSinner]

Re: Winning the Lottery, Easy As It sounds?

If they really loved God, they would of given Gods money to the LBC. He already had a job and was earning a living. Now he is going to quit, denying the world of his services, and encourage all his family for generations to come to be good for nothing.

I think I have to agree with you both, you are a wise man Brother James, and thanks for the scriptural reinforcement, Sister, you made his very convincing theory into cold hard fact.

Let it be known that I won't make the same mistake when GOD tests me! Anyway I was studying the Psalms and I decided my first number will definitely be 7. (Psalm 12:6)

[Liam the ex-drunk]

Re: Winning the Lottery, Easy As It sounds?

Greetings Brothers and Sisters in Christ,

I was just walking home from Church today when I decided, as I always do, to pick up a copy of The Landoverian Times from the newsagents on Eisenhower Lane. I like to keep abreast of what's going on in America firstly, and then if there's something bad happening elsewhere I always enjoy a good laugh.

Anyway, I got home and my little darling opened the door; "Daddy!" she shouted, as I pushed her out the way and made my way to the kitchen. Like always I start getting pestered before I can even think.. "Daddy, I need some new writing books for school". I hate the materialistic attitude she has sometimes, so I told her I'm not throwing away money on something she doesn't need. I made my way to the Dining table to make myself comfortable and turned my 60" plasma television off, opened my paper and found a story that caught my eye:



It caught my eye not because a woman got something wrong again, but because I clearly see that this was another example of GOD's work. Jim and his wife had pleased Our Almighty with their plans for many generations of children, and He had rewarded them greatly, Shout GLORY!

My point is that the fine upstanding True Christians™ of Freehold, GOD's favourite people, are pretty much guaranteed lottery wins, we can just pray for it! Now I know you're probably thinking what I did, "But you CAN'T do the lottery, stop loving money!" (Ecclesiastes 5:10).

I refute that and declare that I will only get rich because GOD has convinced me to do the lottery, because he wants to reward me for my generous tithing, strong parenting and brilliant backing vocals in the choir. Much like the story of Isaac in Genesis! (Genesis 26:12-14) Praise Him!

Anyway, I need to pick the right numbers from scripture, any ideas? Some atheists that haven't even won the lottery once themselves told me it's to do with luck and it doesn't matter what I choose - those idiots continue to crack me up, so naive.

It seems as if you've already cracked the scriptural code. There's 5 to start, straight from the scripture you have quoted. Then, if it's a six number lottery, just do it between 1 and whatever the highest number each week. You are then guaranteed a jackpot win within the year.

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Winning the Lottery, Easy As It sounds?

Whatever numbers you pick, you cannot go wrong with prayer. Surely a loving God cannot refuse to do what His followers ask of Him with a sincere spirit.

[Lady Delacroix]

Re: Winning the Lottery, Easy As It sounds?

What a nice story, very heartwarming to all Christians. I'd pick the first however many numbers you come across today that the Lord puts in front of you. Considering I have never played the lottery I'm not quite sure how many numbers you would choose!

Either way, very heart warming piece and you sound like you have an adorable daughter!

In God We Lotto, Janine Walker

It depends. Certain states have multiple games ranging from 3 numbers to 6 or 7 numbers. The ones with more numbers have higher money jackpots, but the numbers are more difficult to match.

[WinnerNotSinner]

Re: Winning the Lottery, Easy As It sounds?

It's 6 numbers I need.

The ones with more numbers have higher money jackpots, but the numbers are more difficult to match.

It won't be more difficult to match, I'm sure if the LORD can choose 3 numbers to come up for me, he can choose 6 with ease, nothing is too difficult for Him. I might need to pray a little harder, but you're underestimating Him.

I've decided on my second number, 4! This number seems to represent GOD's brilliant creation of the world and his control over the elements that affect us everyday.
(Matthew 24:31; Revelation 7:1; Revelation 20:8; Acts 10:11)

[Rebuko the Clown]

Re: Winning the Lottery, Easy As It sounds?

I have come up with a 100% surefire way to win the Lottery! No Im totally serius, if you can do everything the way your supposed to then you can win...EVERY TIME. And i know its true because it came to me after many hours of prayer. One time I spent my entire paycheck on lottery tickets and I lost. I hit myself in the head for not using it to pay the rent i owed the landlady. Anyways i prayed and Jesus came to me in my heart and told me about how to win the lottery every time. Here is how it works....

What you do is buy enough tickets to cover every single possible numerical combination! For example, there are six numbers each of them 6 thru 49. I ran that through a lottery calculator and got the odds at 1 in 7,059,052 to win the lottery. OK big odds, right?

Not if you buy 7 million tickets!!! But okay I dont have 7 million dollars so what you do is pool it. You find 6,999,999 other people who each put in a dollar each to buy a ticket. And you have to make sure everyone has different numbers. So once you got every combo available and every ticket available any jackpot above 7 million will be profitable.

I know it might be hard to find millions of people but you can get people on facebook to help out and on here. There are billions and billions of people on the internet right now and i know you can find people to join.

The only problem is reimbursing. Like if you won the lottery, would you share your winnings with 7 million strangers? I dont know, theres lots of greedy people in this world. But think about it: You could with your 7 million person team win every single lottery in every single state. 5 dollar win here, 1 dollar win there, it will start to add up after a while.

If anyone is interested in taking part please PM me.

[Lady Delacroix]

Re: Winning the Lottery, Easy As It sounds?

How about this: I'll buy a lottery ticket for myself, and if I win the jackpot, I'll convert, tithe, move to Freehold, whatever you want. But, if I don't win, then I won't.
Deal?

[Bible Student]

Re: Winning the Lottery, Easy As It sounds?

I have come up with a 100% surefire way to win the Lottery! No Im totally serius, if you can do everything the way your supposed to then you can win...EVERY TIME. And i know its true because it came to me after many hours of prayer. One time I spent my entire paycheck on lottery tickets and I lost. I hit myself in the head for not using it to pay the rent i owed the landlady. Anyways i prayed and Jesus came to me in my heart and told me about how to win the lottery every time. Here is how it works....

What you do is buy enough tickets to cover every single possible numerical combination! For example, there are six numbers each of them 6 thru 49. I ran that through a lottery calculator and got the odds at 1 in 7,059,052 to win the lottery. OK big odds, right?

Not if you buy 7 million tickets!!! But okay I dont have 7 million dollars so what you do is pool it. You find 6,999,999 other people who each put in a dollar each to buy a ticket. And you have to make sure everyone has different numbers. So once you got every combo available and every ticket available any jackpot above 7 million will be profitable.

I know it might be hard to find millions of people but you can get people on facebook to help out and on here. There are billions and billions of people on the internet right now and i know you can find people to join.

The only problem is reimbursing. Like if you won the lottery, would you share your winnings with 7 million strangers? I dont know, theres lots of greedy people in this world. But think about it: You could with your 7 million person team win every single lottery in every single state. 5 dollar win here, 1 dollar win there, it will start to add up after a while.

If anyone is interested in taking part please PM me.

The weak link in that theory is that if someone else hits one of your numbers you have to split the money. And if you are unlucky enough for 2 others to hit.... Well you can see where this leads.

Next question is whether you want the cash or the annuity. Then don't forget about the taxes they take up front.

As to the cash, a smart investor can make more money than the annuity will pay out. The downside to that is that a smart investor can make more money than the annuity will pay out.

You will have to play when the payouts are really, really big and the ones that do that have odds in the range of 113,000,000 to 1.