GRUEL: A Tithing Recipe - The Landover Baptist Church Forum

Brother Temperance

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True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
A very nice young man

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Join Date: Sep 2006

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#16

11-01-2006, 02:07 PM

Re: GRUEL: A Tithing Recipe

Originally posted by Ixi View Post

Ugh, how could anyone eat that? How about a nice cup of spicy apple cider and cupcakes with sprinkles? Now THAT is good.

Typical unsaved scum... here we are, having a decent Christian discussion of Godly alternatives to Pot Noodles, and you barge in recommending we get off our faces on white cider. Why does Satan lead you to debauch our Holy board in this manner?

O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.

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How the King James Bible Saved me from anal sex!

God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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