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  • Mary Etheldreda
    Gushing for Jesus
     
    • Sep 2011
    • 23775

    #1

    Let's Help a Brother Out

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    Serious inquiries can contact the Front Office for Dr. Little's phone number.
    Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

  • Isabella White
    True Christian™ Icon of Feminine Virtue
     
    • Mar 2019
    • 4284

    #2
    Oh, isn't that just such a nice advertisement, dear Sister Mary? The only thing that is missing from Dr. Little's list of specific preferences is that nobody should apply if they are a fan of that witch, Taylor Swift. That would level the playing field very quickly!

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    Last edited by Isabella White; 06-21-2024, 01:12 AM. Reason: Corrected formatting error.
    (Mrs.) Isabella White

    Hebrews 10:19 " Having therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the holiest by the of "

    Comment

    • Johny Joe Hold
      Mayor of Freehold
       
      • Feb 2010
      • 12461

      #3
      He wants to father soldiers for Jesus. Girls, pass this along.
      Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.

      Comment

      • Dr. Anthony J. Toole
        An old soul
        True Christian™
        • Aug 2013
        • 4905

        #4
        Why Dr. Billy is limiting himself to the 18-25 age group I'll never understand. There's plenty of 12-17 year olds looking for a more experienced man.
        If I have seen further, it is by standing on the heads of others.

        Comment

        • Romeo Rovagnati
          Jesuit Insurgency Operative
          Forum Member
          • Aug 2016
          • 651

          #5
          I have a question to ask to this Billy: If you really are a Christian then why, instead of chasing down your own lust, don't you spend the rest of your life in prayer and chastity? The reward will be much higher, I can assure you.

          Comment

          • MitzaLizalor
            Completely CRAZY for the Lord
            True Christian™
            • Sep 2010
            • 14217

            #6
            Originally posted by Romeo Rovagnati View Post
            I have a question to ask to this Billy: If you really are a Christian then why, instead of chasing down your own lust, don't you spend the rest of your life in prayer and chastity? The reward will be much higher, I can assure you. [INAPPROPRIATE SMILEY REMOVED​]
            Yours seems a very pecuniary approach. Billy OTOH is not chasing down anything: he is following God's twice-given commandment.

            ONCE: Genesis 1:28a And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth

            TWICE: Genesis 8:22 – 9:1 While the earth remaineth, seedtime and harvest, and cold and heat, and summer and winter, and day and night shall not cease. And God blessed Noah and his sons, and said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth.​

            Note use of imperative mood.
            Last edited by MitzaLizalor; 06-24-2024, 07:55 AM.

            Comment

            • Romeo Rovagnati
              Jesuit Insurgency Operative
              Forum Member
              • Aug 2016
              • 651

              #7
              Originally posted by MitzaLizalor View Post
              Yours seems a very pecuniary approach. Billy OTOH is not chasing down anything: he is following God's twice-given commandment.
              Well, anyway. If he really wants young women to follow him, the question I'm asking him is: how much money does he have? Because it is a very well know fact that young women only cares about marrying rich men.

              Comment

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