[Sister Charli]

Re: Thinking It Is About Time I Got Back Out There

I know Sister...

I'm so eager to find a woman and get the production line started again. I have but one fine son for Christ and at least 19 to go. The Holy Spirit moves me every night to spread the Good News®.

You know you are the one I want. But this appears not to be in His will. Can you blame me for at least trying to find an inferior woman? I am only fertile for so long, you know?

The sooner you make your decision final, the sooner I can find a suitable mate.

Yours in Christ!

Mr Rubicon.

I am most offended by this public humiliation.

I am pleased I got to see your true colours before our cyber social intercourse progressed any further.

Excuse my absence for a few hours. I am going to console myself in the kitchen making a couple of dozen pies.

[Brother Harold Porter]

Re: Thinking It Is About Time I Got Back Out There

Rev. Osborne, I must ask you of a small favor. Do not defame Mr Dewitt. He has been a long standing friend of mine. If you pursue said plans, certain photos can and will be made available during your up and coming divorce trial. Do you really want to drag a certain blond young lady and her father into court. Oh by the way I do love your choice of ladies undergarments, pedibears are so darn cute. Sam Diamond

What a mess this has become! Now Sam's involved??

Sister Phebe, my heart belongs to you but I cannot afford the risk of having this man looking into my private life.

All the best in Christ!

[Sam Diamond]

Re: Thinking It Is About Time I Got Back Out There

Just landed in Perth, Australia this evening. I will be hitting Brisbane, Queensland on the last leg of Ausfest™. I'll have you know, my dear Phebe, that I have discovered some, well, unfortunate things about Brother Dewitt. I will have to show you the photos in person because you won't believe it. I have a feeling it may make you reconsider your possible future with him.

Rev. Osborne, I must ask you of a small favor. Do not defame Mr Dewitt. He has been a long standing friend of mine. If you pursue said plans, certain photos can and will be made available during your up and coming divorce trial. Do you really want to drag a certain blond young lady and her father into court. Oh by the way I do love your choice of ladies undergarments, pedibears are so darn cute. Sam Diamond

[James Dewitt]

Re: Thinking It Is About Time I Got Back Out There

Brothers Rubicon and Davidson, I am trying to win the heart of Mrs Phebe. Take your petty differences elsewhere.

[Warner S. Davidson]

Re: Thinking It Is About Time I Got Back Out There

Oh... so she's not good enough for you now?

Brother Rubicon: I am not sure what you are implying –

Currently and for the short term I have no plans to Wed anyone whether that be Sister Emily Beth, Sister Phebe or anyone else for that matter.

This is evidenced very clearly around the Ministry

Once I have attained True Christian(tm) status, repented my previous sinful ways and have glorified God and the good Pastors of the LBC via Tithing programs I will then select an appropriate True Christian™ lady in with which to procreate with.

Brother, I do hope that these matters are clarified / finalised

[James Dewitt]

Re: Thinking It Is About Time I Got Back Out There

My Dearest Phebe, It has been a long day. I had a four hour layover in Chicago. It had some thing to do with a rag head on the plane and a underwear bomb. All the people on the plane where forced to wait while the air port security did a whole body search. It did however give me so time to think.
As I was sitting in the terminal at O'Hare, some thing crossed my mind, what is love?
I think love has many meanings, sure there is the physical attraction( for making soldiers for Jesus), and you are by far one of the loveliest ladies that I have ever seen. But it is more than that, I need a soul mate to walk with hand in hand down the path of Salvation. Some one to share my life with, my love for Jesus. You see a marriage is not always happy times and fun, some times its a hard road to travel. It is full of pit falls and hardships. But if you have a soul mate at your side life no matter what happens, it is wonderful. I need some one to stand with me and face life head on, some one who will help me spread the Word of God.
If the Good Lord blesses us with children , I will indeed be the luckiest man on Earth. If the Good Lord sees fit that we do not have children, I will still be the luckiest man on Earth. I guess my dear sweet Phebe , I have a question to ask. Will you make me the luckiest man on Earth, will you be my wife? I do not expect an answer to day, I understand you need time to think. With deep devotion and Love James

PS .I did have a little extra time in Chicago, I found the most perfect ring. its 8.5 carrots, solitaire cut set in platinum, it is as flawless as you are.

[Brother Harold Porter]

Re: Thinking It Is About Time I Got Back Out There

Not at all Brother Rubicon –

It was not my intention to mock or offend as I was only thinking out aloud, so to speak.

What was clear and of particular note to me from your comments was your immediate requirement for more Soldiers for Christ

As detailed previously I don't require a bride for some time and I was of the view that this could be an immediate and practical solution for your dilemma

Oh... so she's not good enough for you now?

[Brother Harold Porter]

Re: Thinking It Is About Time I Got Back Out There

Just landed in Perth, Australia this evening. I will be hitting Brisbane, Queensland on the last leg of Ausfest™. I'll have you know, my dear Phebe, that I have discovered some, well, unfortunate things about Brother Dewitt. I will have to show you the photos in person because you won't believe it. I have a feeling it may make you reconsider your possible future with him.

Praise Jesus Christ! I knew there was a dark side to that casanova! All that sweet talking stuff...

Yours in Christ!

[Warner S. Davidson]

Re: Thinking It Is About Time I Got Back Out There

Emily Beth, bless her pure heart, is a cousin several times removed. When I was 20 and she 18, she refused my advances. Why in the world do you think I would offer her to YOU if I could have had her??

Are you making fun of my family, Brother?

Not at all Brother Rubicon –

It was not my intention to mock or offend as I was only thinking out aloud, so to speak.

What was clear and of particular note to me from your comments was your immediate requirement for more Soldiers for Christ

As detailed previously I don't require a bride for some time and I was of the view that this could be an immediate and practical solution for your dilemma

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

Re: Thinking It Is About Time I Got Back Out There

Just landed in Perth, Australia this evening. I will be hitting Brisbane, Queensland on the last leg of Ausfest(tm). I'll have you know, my dear Phebe, that I have discovered some, well, unfortunate things about Brother Dewitt. I will have to show you the photos in person because you won't believe it. I have a feeling it may make you reconsider your possible future with him.

[Brother Harold Porter]

Re: Thinking It Is About Time I Got Back Out There

I know Sister...


Brother Rubicon

Just a thought..........

Is Sister Emily Beth a first or second cousin?

If she is the latter there may be an opportunity from God to wed her without breaking any laws and to then recommence producing Christs Soldiers.

By your own admission and recommendation she is very eligible, still able to breed and somewhat of a “Catch”


This is worth podering surely

Emily Beth, bless her pure heart, is a cousin several times removed. When I was 20 and she 18, she refused my advances. Why in the world do you think I would offer her to YOU if I could have had her??

Are you making fun of my family, Brother?

[handmaiden]

Re: Thinking It Is About Time I Got Back Out There

perhaps we should talk WEDDING!!.

@ the lovely, ever wise Handmaiden. Sage advice indeed, Sister. Perhaps there may be a Maid-ron of Honor (gosh.. me being silly with a play on words..) position open should things progress?



YIC,

Sister Phebe.

I would love to be a bridesmaid or bridematron. I am great at planning weddings as long as they're not my own.

Now instead of an immoral bachelorette shower with dancing men dangling their barely covered man parts-- (Really, the male organ of generation is silly enough on its own, is there really any need for gold sequins to cap the comedy impact?)-- I would like to suggest another activity. How about skydiving? Taking a big leap before the Big Leap? Get it ?

I jumped out an airplane once and it was glorious. I also saw men dancing around in little g-strings and it was considerably less glorious.

In fact, between those two activities and a third one, (all took place as birthday treats) I would have to rate them as such:

Skydiving, painting ceramics, male strippers.

Let me know your preference asap, so I can find a pottery shop or a parachute as needed.

Helpfully Yours,

Handmaiden

[Warner S. Davidson]

Re: Thinking It Is About Time I Got Back Out There

I know Sister...

I'm so eager to find a woman and get the production line started again. I have but one fine son for Christ and at least 19 to go. The Holy Spirit moves me every night to spread the Good News®.

You know you are the one I want. But this appears not to be in His will. Can you blame me for at least trying to find an inferior woman? I am only fertile for so long, you know?

The sooner you make your decision final, the sooner I can find a suitable mate.

Yours in Christ!

Brother Rubicon

Just a thought..........

Is Sister Emily Beth a first or second cousin?

If she is the latter there may be an opportunity from God to wed her without breaking any laws and to then recommence producing Christs Soldiers.

By your own admission and recommendation she is very eligible, still able to breed and somewhat of a “Catch”

This is worth podering surely

[Brother Harold Porter]

Re: Thinking It Is About Time I Got Back Out There

Hello Brother Rubicon,

I truly cannot understand your "broken heart" when, on my own personals thread no less, you have more than alluded to a 2-4-1 deal with myself and Sister Sylvia, and now you are openly wooing Sister Charli.



Mrs.P.Wintersnow.

I know Sister...

I'm so eager to find a woman and get the production line started again. I have but one fine son for Christ and at least 19 to go. The Holy Spirit moves me every night to spread the Good News®.

You know you are the one I want. But this appears not to be in His will. Can you blame me for at least trying to find an inferior woman? I am only fertile for so long, you know?

The sooner you make your decision final, the sooner I can find a suitable mate.

Yours in Christ!

[Phebe Carlyle]

Re: Thinking It Is About Time I Got Back Out There

Sister Phebe,

I knew, in my heart, it would come to this and my heart is broken.

A handsome man with billions, worldy trinkets and a Gulfstream V to flit between Freehold and NYC on a moment's notice.

Perhaps you are better off.

I'll be in my trailer with the Bible, alone, as you two begin your global honeymoon. Have fun.....

Always yours though...

In Christ

Hello Brother Rubicon,

I truly cannot understand your "broken heart" when, on my own personals thread no less, you have more than alluded to a 2-4-1 deal with myself and Sister Sylvia, and now you are openly wooing Sister Charli.



Mrs.P.Wintersnow.