The Most High and Holy Prayer

[James Dewitt]

Re: The Most High and Holy Prayer

Come on Jo Freddie you are just pulling our legs aren't you.
Cant you come up with a better story than talking noodles. Lenguniians , ravolids etc. Whats next talking garlic bread?
Oh wait why not a talking bush while you are at it....never mind. Back to the noodle with meat ball eyes, that is funny.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: The Most High and Holy Prayer

I wonder what Parrot roasting over Hells sulfurous fires with a side of pasta would taste like. Something Satan might enjoy for lunch perhaps?

Sulphurous fires would taint the flavour of any meal cooked over it, There is no Satan.

An Announcement Regarding the Afterlife

1. An ancient and venerable sage spoke unto the Pastaists of all the divisions, unto the Noodleists, and unto the Maranarists, the Fettucinians, the Pastafarians, and all of the great Pasta-based members of the Holy and Delicious Faith, and said:
2. It is my contention that a loving God of any kind would not Damn someone to Hell.
3. Darning them to Hell would be a problem for a supposedly intelligent creator.
4. Lakes of fire, boiling waters, sauces, etc, aren't a good choice.
5. If you want to attract "justified" persons, portray just rewards and punishments.
6. If you want to attract lunatics and sadists, portray violent punishments.

This shows use that your Church wishes to attract " lunatics and sadists"

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: The Most High and Holy Prayer

I wonder what Parrot roasting over Hells sulfurous fires with a side of pasta would taste like. Something Satan might enjoy for lunch perhaps?

[Jo Freddie]

Re: The Most High and Holy Prayer

You are a sick, sick man, do you know that? God hates to be mocked.

I do not mock God, I praise Him in all His Noodly Goodness, for he is our Lord and creator. Why do you hate God so much?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: The Most High and Holy Prayer

You are a sick, sick man, do you know that? God hates to be mocked.

[Jo Freddie]

The True and Wonderous Story of How Was Delivered Unto Auntie Dee Dee the Most High and Holy Prayer:
As was recounted to Solipsy, Humble GalleyScribe

And The Flying Spaghetti Monster did come unto Dee Dee waiting at the front of Fred's Italian Corner, for she was hungry and her wait did seem to be unending, and he filled her with His Heavenly Smells, and unto her He did speak:

“My True Believer and most excellent Administrator, My keeper of the knowledge that All is My Creation, and as much as any creationism is to be taught as science, My Creation is to be taught as science, I ask of you this: Carry to My True Believers these instructions, that when they give thanks for the Holy Feast, they shall remember and pray these words”:

Our One Creator Which Flies and is Spaghetti and a Monster,

• I believe Thou art the Creator of Goodness and Nourishment, and of Sustenance. I thank the Pasta, and the Sauce, and the Meatballs, for they provide me all my needs.
• I thank Thee for the Many Beverages that Thou provides, for they engender true fellowship, and I will quaff them heartily, be they Beer, or Wine, or Sweet Iced Tea (in the South), or even Milk or Kool-Aid, for it is not good to withhold fluids, and I need to take care of my Body, as Beneficiary of Thine Holy Goodness.
• I thank Thee for the giving of healthful Green Salad, the Yummy Garlic Bread, and the Blessed Cheese for the top of my Spaghetti, and also I am most thankful that If I eat All my Dinner, a Dessert of Extreme Chocolateness will surely follow, preferably Dark Chocolate, for it is Good.
• I believe that Thou are neither Male, nor Female, but are instead beyond the reaches of the gender confusion of Man and Woman Kind, yea, thou are ageless, timeless and all-encompassing.
• I most humbly thank Thee, oh Noodly Appendaged One, for Touching me with the mental capacity to adapt the mythologies of This Universe to aid and comfort me here, until that day I am able to join together with my Pastafarian Brothers and Sisters at the foot of the Beer Volcano, and enumerate my specifications at the Stripper Factory, so that happiness and contentedness and good cheer be present for all, forever and forever,

RAmen.

And then the Flying Spaghetti Monster did sigh, for His Child Dee Dee did occasionally take it upon herself to embellish, and He laughed a jiggly laugh, for it was not He who specified the darkness of the chocolate in the dessert, nor that it be chocolate at all. He did tickle Dee Dee with his Appendages, and she did promise to confess to all that Our Lord Glob doth approve all sweet desserts, as long as the True Believer hath wasted not the Holy Meal.