Pray That I Give A Good Message!

[Mr.Warren]

This Sunday I get to do my rotation for the 5-8 year old class! I'm really really nervous about the whole thing because I have a slight stuttering problem when I get too excited, and I'm really really really excited that I get to deliver God's Truth to this group of youngsters, and hopefully I'll be able to keep them from getting corrupted by the awful, sinful world of public "education". Although, I technically only get two Sundays in a row, then another youth gets their turn and I get stuck back in the small child care if I want to volunteer .
So pray that God blesses me with a message pure and true! Also, if any of my superiors would like to impart some wisdom it would be much appreciated.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Pray That I Give A Good Message!

What's your sermon, pal?

I always like 2 Kings 2:23-24.

[Deaner]

Re: Pray That I Give A Good Message!

This Sunday I get to do my rotation for the 5-8 year old class! I'm really really nervous about the whole thing because I have a slight stuttering problem when I get too excited, and I'm really really really excited that I get to deliver God's Truth to this group of youngsters, and hopefully I'll be able to keep them from getting corrupted by the awful, sinful world of public "education". Although, I technically only get two Sundays in a row, then another youth gets their turn and I get stuck back in the small child care if I want to volunteer .
So pray that God blesses me with a message pure and true! Also, if any of my superiors would like to impart some wisdom it would be much appreciated.

I really don't know you Mr. Warren but I will take you at your word. Your avatar looks like you are Mr. Happy the child buggerer. Get to class dressed all in black and carry a buggy whip. Use it on the first child you see right or wrong. This possibly might get you some respect.

However, if you stutter, saying "y-y-you just b-b-b-b-better shut your m-m-m-m; lips... just ain't gonna cut it.

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: Pray That I Give A Good Message!

What kind of new age pinko church is this that you are attending. With a deformity, like stuttering, a True Christian Church wouldn't let you through the front door, much less allow you to interact in any way with the children.
Look to the Bible and do not sully the children.

Ex.4:11
Who maketh the dumb, or deaf, or the seeing, or the blind? have not I the LORD?

Lev.21:17-23
Whosoever ... hath any blemish, let him not approach to offer the bread of his God. For whatsoever man he be that hath a blemish, he shall not approach: a blind man, or a lame, or he that hath a flat nose, or any thing superfluous, Or a man that is brokenfooted, or brokenhanded, Or crookbackt, or a dwarf, or that hath a blemish in his eye, or be scurvy, or scabbed, or hath his stones broken; No man that hath a blemish of the seed of Aaron the priest shall come nigh to offer the offerings of the LORD made by fire: he hath a blemish; he shall not come nigh to offer the bread of his God. ... Only he shall not go in unto the vail, nor come nigh unto the altar, because he hath a blemish; that he pro

[Mary-Yves Lapierre]

Re: Pray That I Give A Good Message!

If you really are the Christian, then just pray to God to removing your stutterings!! So simple, silly boy!!!

Matthew 7:7
Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:

[Mr.Warren]

Re: Pray That I Give A Good Message!

Firstly, I do not know where the whole stuttering thing came from, I do not have a stutter . I actually am a fantastic orator
My message was "Children and the Wrath of God"
I wound up wearing some slacks and a formal shirt, and my message ended up incorporating Pastor Ezekiel's verse in there.
Apparently word shortly got around about my sermon and it was "too intense" for my age group and I have been taken off rotation for an "indefinite period of time". Shortly after receiving that phone call I decided to leave the Church.
I learned that just because a church calls themselves Baptist doesn't make them Baptist

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Pray That I Give A Good Message!

Firstly, I do not know where the whole stuttering thing came from, I do not have a stutter . I actually am a fantastic orator
My message was "Children and the Wrath of God"
I wound up wearing some slacks and a formal shirt, and my message ended up incorporating Pastor Ezekiel's verse in there.
Apparently word shortly got around about my sermon and it was "too intense" for my age group and I have been taken off rotation for an "indefinite period of time". Shortly after receiving that phone call I decided to leave the Church.
I learned that just because a church calls themselves Baptist doesn't make them Baptist

Amen to that. You've probably gotten yourself mixed up with church full of SBC false Christians.

Please post your sermon here (or send it to me privately via the email link in my signature below) and I'll be happy to critique it for you.

[Free Market Fred]

Re: Pray That I Give A Good Message!

Well, OK Brother Warren, I'll pray that you give a good massage, if that's what gets you through the night. But I want to let you know that if you ever get to Cambodia, I can take you to this great bar where you'll get the best massage of your life. It's a real popular place with Christian missionaries over here.


Great place for a missionary position

Erh wait, sorry, you said "message." Damn, I need to get new contact lenses. Never mind, disregard this post.