Please Pray For My Relationship With The Holy Spirit

[WWJDnow]

The Holy Spirit and I have a slightly rocky relationship right now. The last time He spoke to me, in a moment of weakness, I asked Him whether Mary was a good lay. I really didn't mean it as an insult--it was just a random thought that popped into my head at the wrong time--but the Holy Spirit is very touchy about those things. Thankfully, Jesus is trying to smooth things over for me, which is very generous, given that I asked that impertinent question about his mom. But I'm not sure that Jesus can handle this on His own, so I need all of the help I can get.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Please Pray For My Relationship With The Holy Spirit

The Holy Spirit and I have a slightly rocky relationship right now. The last time He spoke to me, in a moment of weakness, I asked Him whether Mary was a good lay. I really didn't mean it as an insult--it was just a random thought that popped into my head at the wrong time--but the Holy Spirit is very touchy about those things. Thankfully, Jesus is trying to smooth things over for me, which is very generous, given that I asked that impertinent question about his mom. But I'm not sure that Jesus can handle this on His own, so I need all of the help I can get.

It would be no inconvenience for me, Brother. I pray for you on a regular basis anyway. All this does is make the content more specific.

I don't think this constitutes blasphemy of the Holy Ghost. As long as the words "the Holy Spirit is stupid and gay" never cross your mind, you should be in the clear. Make sure you don't ever think that.

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Please Pray For My Relationship With The Holy Spirit

The Holy Spirit and I have a slightly rocky relationship right now. The last time He spoke to me, in a moment of weakness, I asked Him whether Mary was a good lay. I really didn't mean it as an insult--it was just a random thought that popped into my head at the wrong time--but the Holy Spirit is very touchy about those things. Thankfully, Jesus is trying to smooth things over for me, which is very generous, given that I asked that impertinent question about his mom. But I'm not sure that Jesus can handle this on His own, so I need all of the help I can get.

Along with several of your other friends, I am organizing a prayer circle to pray for you.

I don't happen to like the somewhat gay practice of holding hands while in these prayer circles, but we will be joined in spirit to lift our voices on your behalf.

On the matter of your question to the Holy Spirit, I'm not a theologian, but we know it was the Holy Spirit who got Mary pregnant. Guys do ask each other about such things. I think you will get a forgiveness pass in short order.

JJH, Mayor

[WWJDnow]

Re: Please Pray For My Relationship With The Holy Spirit

As long as the words "the Holy Spirit is stupid and gay" never cross your mind, you should be in the clear.

Thank God for that (and thank you for your prayers)! I would never think such a thing. Come to think of it, if the Holy Spirit were gay, I wouldn't have gotten into this mess in the first place.

I don't happen to like the somewhat gay practice of holding hands while in these prayer circles, but we will be joined in spirit to lift our voices on your behalf.

Thanks, Mayor. With the good people of Freehold behind me, I'm in good shape. I appreciate the prayers and your care in the manner of praying. The last thing I need right now is for Jesus to think that He's getting a gay prayer!

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Please Pray For My Relationship With The Holy Spirit

It seems to me, Brother, that you have brought up a topic which should be aired in the religious community. That the Holy Spirit had its way with Mary is a beautiful concept, but what really happened there?

I think even we True Christians™ would all benefit from a little more information.