I sinned today. Need Prayer.

[VictoryOS]

Re: I sinned today. Need Prayer.

Unfortunately when he got his hands off his tallywhacker and up to return the salute he was not involved in a one car fatal. He didn’t even have a wreak.

I'm so sorry I missed this thread the first time around. The Lord has surely led the Unsaved Trash to reply to this old thread to bring it to my attention. I have a suggestion to Brother Lazarus or anyone else who ends up in a situation like this.

When someone is tailgating you, ease up on the bumper of the car in front of you. Make sure there is no other traffic coming. Then suddenly veer into the other lane. The driver behind you won't know what's going on until he finds himself in the rear-end of the car that suddenly appeared in front of him.

It works like a charm every time...or so I'm told.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: I sinned today. Need Prayer.

You people need therapy...

Coming from a wad of drunken aussie scum, I'd consider that a compliment. We are blessed by your persecution.

[WanKer]

Re: I sinned today. Need Prayer.

You people need therapy...

[Brother Enoch]

Re: I sinned today. Need Prayer.

And if they are papist, you immediatly throw them into your car and bring them to Landover to be..ermm....rehabilitated.


Remember- they like to wear funny fish hats and eat wafers. If you see this man, bring him to Freehold immediatly.

This is dangerous advice to be giving a mere member. Of course you are shielded by God's Holy protection, but that there is Satan's Rottweiller. Not even a human, but a demon in human form. And a powerful one.

Yes, one True Christian could contain it, but the battle could cause damage to innocents and pre-saved women and children. But a mere member? He could incite the beast to an orgy of pedophilia and outright carnage such as the world has never seen. Truly the safest course is to take this one down carefully if you encounter it at the local 7 eleven. I'd recommend at least 8 True Christians, to keep the collateral damage to the minimun. And don't capture it, kill it. There is nothing human there to be saved, that was banished decades ago.

This I know from my lost years as a papist and apprentice filth demon.

Edit: Or to avoid the danger of unpleasing collateral damage, engage the demon in a Catlick neighborhood. All collateral damage will be pleasing in the eyes of the Lord.

[Cheshire]

Re: I sinned today. Need Prayer.

And if they are papist, you immediatly throw them into your car and bring them to Landover to be..ermm....rehabilitated.


Remember- they like to wear funny fish hats and eat wafers. If you see this man, bring him to Freehold immediatly.

[Deaner]

Re: I sinned today. Need Prayer.

I’ve found that in the open streets I can’t tell a Papist from anyone else!

Ask them if they would like to meet your new friend and hold up a statue. If they say "Hi, how are you?" you know it's a papist.

[Brother Lazarus]

Re: I sinned today. Need Prayer.

I’ve done a lot of praying since yesterday’s incident. My Godly mission to this point has been to try to bring Papists to True Christianity. I admit I have had some setbacks in that undertaking. I’ve found that in the open streets I can’t tell a Papist from anyone else! There are the wetbacks Mexicans, but they don’t speak God’s own English. I’ve tried street preaching in front of every St. Someone’s Parish and Child Buggary building I can find but the Police (obviously unsaved heathen and sometimes even negros) threaten me with arrest.

Well, it seems God has seen my struggles and has Blessed me with a new mission! I will now seek out and witness to wigra youth and bitch slap encourage them to come to Christ and be saved. I calculated that since SC is 33% negro, there are 1,320,000 negros out there trying to corrupt our innocent white boys and girls. That is a tall task but I’m sure I can make a difference. Wigras are easy to spot, so I will no longer have to wonder who needs bitch slapping caning ministry.

Pray for me as I set out on my God appointed mission!

Yours in Christ

Brother Lazarus

[Cheshire]

Re: I sinned today. Need Prayer.

How about you go and hunt them down? I assume you remember/wrote down their license number?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: I sinned today. Need Prayer.

Son, you need to paint Bible verses all over your car. That way, everyone can be Saved©! Glory!!

[Brother Lazarus]

Today while driving on a busy street there was a homer ex-white boy in a Jap made Lexus SUV behind me (Obviously owned by a mommy and a daddy who are not giving True Christian discipline.) I could barely see his head over the steering wheel he was slung so low in the driver’s seat. (Typical negro driving behavior.) His ghetto negro music was playing so loudly that the bass was rattling every cubic inch of my AMERICAN manufactured Jeep.

I slowed down enough to be sure he’d get impatient and pass me. I saw he had wheel spinners, (a negro driving necessity), but his windows were not tinted enough for him to miss my sin. I admit, I hit my horn and I gave him the universal gesture of contempt. Unfortunately when he got his hands off his tallywhacker and up to return the salute he was not involved in a one car fatal. He didn’t even have a wreak. I should have just waited for the next light and approached his SUV and explained to him exactly why he’s on the road to hell, not the road to the Piggly Wiggly.

Please pray for me.

Yours in Christ

Brother Lazarus