pie in the sky?

[Muttthepreacher]

Brothers ,
I need some help. My wife and I have been married for 11 yrs. I have tried to train her in the ways of the Lord,but for some reason, I cannot get the woman to BAKE A PIE!
This is a source of embarrassment ( and sometimes outright mockery) to me.
Beatings don't help...all I get is the "I already work full time ,clean the house,cut wood ,pave the driveway," ad nauseum arguement.
I really could use your prayers and help!

In Him,
Mutt

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: pie in the sky?

Maybe you should try converting to Christianity.

[GodIsAlmighty]

Re: pie in the sky?

Well, if it's the fact she just does not want to, then more beatings are definitely in order. If she just can't bake well, get her some lessons. If the woman can't even bake a pie after that, perhaps you should separate. Still, the thing that gets me is how people like you get stuck in this situation in the first place! Surely you wouldn't marry someone who doesn't bake pies. Did her father tell you that she doesn't bake?

[Jed_Cassidy]

Re: pie in the sky?

Son, perhaps it is not entirely your wife's fault that she doesn't know how to bake pies. After all it was her mother's responsibility to teach her daughter (your wife) the proper ways of an obedient True Christian™ woman, such as being able to bake pies for the man of the house. Not only are beatings are in order for your wife, but perhaps your mother-in-law as well? In a case like this, it's only fair for blame to be passed all around to those who deserve it.

Let me know how it goes!
Jed

[Butch Albright]

Re: pie in the sky?

Brother Jed has a good point! If my dear, late Maude hadn't known how to bake a good ol' American apple pie for the end of ever meal and an extra one for every game the boys played, I would have given her AND her mother a good round of what for! I notice you're in Alabama, it seems strange that you weren't informed by her father, was he dead at the time? That would also explain it, if there wasn't a proper source of discipline for her, her mother likely got lazy about teaching her such vital skills. I hope you at least got a proper dowry for the woman. Let us know if Brother Jed's advice works, and if not, you could always check out the Christian Singles part of the forum here on Landover!

Good luck and God Bless!

[Muttthepreacher]

Re: pie in the sky?

Brother Jed has a good point! If my dear, late Maude hadn't known how to bake a good ol' American apple pie for the end of ever meal and an extra one for every game the boys played, I would have given her AND her mother a good round of what for! I notice you're in Alabama, it seems strange that you weren't informed by her father, was he dead at the time? That would also explain it, if there wasn't a proper source of discipline for her, her mother likely got lazy about teaching her such vital skills. I hope you at least got a proper dowry for the woman. Let us know if Brother Jed's advice works, and if not, you could always check out the Christian Singles part of the forum here on Landover!

Good luck and God Bless!

Brother Butch,
This is an example of HOLY GHOST revelation!
Not only was her father deceased when we met...but her mother is FRENCH! And she lives with us.