[Nathan B. Forrest]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

I'm wiping a tear from my eye, this event turned out so well!!!! I'd be grateful to be invited to the wedding, I have to make a run into canada with some firearms for the canadian army (all 5 of them).

[James Hutchins]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

Nothing makes me happier than a story with a blessed ending. Congratulations on the impending grandfatherhood.
I hope you have many grandsons for Christs' Army.

[James Dewitt]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

=James Hutchins;501682]A dilemma for sure.

Any spilling of seed not expressly for the creation of a male Soldier for Christ® is blasphemy.

That's the yucky part she um swallowed the seed

Sex out of wedlock is a blasphemy.
Interracial sex is blasphemy (gross too).

I know Brother I know.

But at least the messican was not gay, so it is a step in the right direction.
The disgusting oral sex was not with a proper white girl.
You will never have to pay 50 shekels.

My idiot son took her to a taco stand for lunch, and used my money. I deducted the $10.00 from her fathers last pay check. She did not work for me her Dad did.

So to me it is a messican standoff (pun intended). I suggest contacting Rev. Jim Osborne, he always has good insight into matter such as this.

I believe Brother Enoch and I have found a way to fix two problems. My idiot son and his half Eskimo daughter will be married SOON. The idiot son will have a wife and a proper place for his seed and Brother Enoch will be rid of daughter, who is getting up in years, she is 14 .Its a win win.

[James Hutchins]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

A dilemma for sure.

Any spilling of seed not expressly for the creation of a male Soldier for Christ® is blasphemy.
Sex out of wedlock is a blasphemy.
Interracial sex is blasphemy (gross too).

But at least the messican was not gay, so it is a step in the right direction.
The disgusting oral sex was not with a proper white girl.
You will never have to pay 50 shekels.

So to me it is a messican standoff (pun intended). I suggest contacting Rev. Jim Osborne, he always has good insight into matter such as this.

I assume the girl worked for you. I hope she did the act on her weekly break and not on the clock.

[James Dewitt]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

I all most forgot here is a picture of the idiot son of mine. His name is Cletus James Dewitt ( Cletus is my wife's fathers name)

[James Dewitt]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

Rev. M. Rodimer, I am so happy that you will do the honors of marring off the kids.
If you want I will fly you in, or you can drive. I know how you do love to minister to truckers. I will pay for all your expenses in advance if you wish. I can give you a prepaid credit card loaded with say $10,000. Diesel fuel is quite expensive, and I do not want you to stay in cheap motels.
If you run short just let me know and I will reload the card.
As to the honorarium, just name your price.
I do need a small favor could you take a small shipment of firearms with you? Its a wedding gift for Brother Enoch.

Brother Enoch I am sending my idiot son of a flight Saturday, and I arranged for a buss ticket for him to get to your homestead. He should be there around 5 or 5:30pm. The buss stop is the liquor store from what I understand. Can we set the date ? I do believe we have reached an agreement. My wife and I will be up 4 or 5 day before the wedding.

[Brother Enoch]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

=Brother Enoch;501415]
I only wish I could say the same thing for my idiot son. Well at least he will make you laugh.

Good. I like funny stupid rather than stupid stupid. Like atheists.

I asked Rev. M. Rodimer if he was interested. He does have a traveling ministry.

Reverend Rodimer would be perfect! I've admired his work for a long time. Plus, I checked and there are 4 truck stops within an hours drive of my homestead. He could witness to a whole new bunch of hairy truckers while he is here!!

[James Dewitt]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

=Brother Enoch;501415]

Sweet! And yes 2 hunting rifles would be great! No handguns though, I don't want the wife to get a hold of one of those

Got it no hand guns.

Contractor? I'll just put it up myself on the weekend.

You are a good man.

Good, good. I'll also let them farm 20% of my holdings (100 acres) for a reasonable portion of the harvest.

That's very reasonable

You can send him straight up. He can stay at the main house and help clear the 100 acres he'll be farming for me to support his new family.

Great I will fly him up in a few days

My daughter is overjoyed. She's been bugging her mom about wanting to play 'grown up' for quite some time. She's particularly excited because I told her that he's not too much smarter than her. She was worried about that because the only person she has ever met who wasn't vastly her intellectual superior is her retarded younger brother. Don't worry about her dumbness though, she takes instruction well, adores discipline, has great cooking and cleaning skills and even has experience caring for infants (younger siblings).

Good, the idiot is warming up to the idea, his mother is not real happy. But she does like the idea of grand children

About her lack of smarts. Don't worry too much about that being passed on to your grandkids. I'm pretty sure her mom was secretly hitting the hootch while she was pregnant with her. It's the Eskimo way. So my daughters damaged brain won't be passed on to her children.

I only wish I could say the same thing for my idiot son. Well at least he will make you laugh. Between the two of them they are almost normal.

One problem we're having is locating a proper Baptist minister to perform the wedding ceremony. Without that ceremony they can't start their lives together in their cabin. Do you know if any of the pastors at Landover would be willing to make the trip up?

I asked Rev. M. Rodimer if he was interested. He does have a traveling ministry.

[Brother Enoch]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

AK 47's are OK , these are better.I will send 6 M16's and 2 50cal machine guns . do you need a couple 30 30 hunting rifles? How are you on hand guns ?

Sweet! And yes 2 hunting rifles would be great! No handguns though, I don't want the wife to get a hold of one of those

Do you know a contractor to erect the cabin?

Contractor? I'll just put it up myself on the weekend.

I purchased 20 acres of land near you.

Good, good. I'll also let them farm 20% of my holdings (100 acres) for a reasonable portion of the harvest.

Now when can I send my idiot son? Is your daughter happy on her pending marriage?

You can send him straight up. He can stay at the main house and help clear the 100 acres he'll be farming for me to support his new family.

My daughter is overjoyed. She's been bugging her mom about wanting to play 'grown up' for quite some time. She's particularly excited because I told her that he's not too much smarter than her. She was worried about that because the only person she has ever met who wasn't vastly her intellectual superior is her retarded younger brother. Don't worry about her dumbness though, she takes instruction well, adores discipline, has great cooking and cleaning skills and even has experience caring for infants (younger siblings).

About her lack of smarts. Don't worry too much about that being passed on to your grandkids. I'm pretty sure her mom was secretly hitting the hootch while she was pregnant with her. It's the Eskimo way. So my daughters damaged brain won't be passed on to her children.

One problem we're having is locating a proper Baptist minister to perform the wedding ceremony. Without that ceremony they can't start their lives together in their cabin. Do you know if any of the pastors at Landover would be willing to make the trip up?

[James Dewitt]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

Sorry for the delay, brother. I didn't expect that you had such incredible access to firearms. I had to work out how to get them across the border, so I made some inquiries. It turns out it's rather simple. You just present the border agent with one of these:



And you're waived through without a search of any kind. This works both at land crossings and at airports. I'm couriering a case to you today.

Do you have access to weapons like these? I don't know what they're called. I asked a neighbor who is part of the Canadian Army Reserves and he said they were called 'ray guns' and they didn't really exist. I don't think he's right.



If you do, would 6 be too many to ask for? I'd like to see Revenue Canada or Child Protective Services try bugging us again when we have 6 times the armament of the entire Canadian 'military'!

AK 47's are OK , these are better.I will send 6 M16's and 2 50cal machine guns . do you need a couple 30 30 hunting rifles? How are you on hand guns ?
Do you know a contractor to erect the cabin? I have made the arrangements to have it shipped next week . I purchased 20 acres of land near you . I will send the deed with the guns and ammo. Now when can I send my idiot son? Is your daughter happy on her pending marriage?

[Brother Enoch]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

Oral sex, is that when you just talk about it?

I was afraid to ask, but I think it's when you have sex with this man



Which is wrong, because it's necrophilia.

[Brother T]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

Oral sex, is that when you just talk about it?

[godmocker1]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

Being Canadian (to my great shame), I know nothing of firearms, I'm sure Brother James will make a suitable suggestion.

i have a limited knowledge. Brother James is most likely far more knowledgeable on the matter. However i would be happy to help if your stuck

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

theyre called ak47's they are the gun of terrorists. you should stuck to true american brands like benelli or beretta

Which part of "Men Only!" requires clarification?

[Brother Enoch]

Re: Oral Sex is it wrong?

theyre called ak47's they are the gun of terrorists. you should stuck to true american brands like benelli or beretta

Being Canadian (to my great shame), I know nothing of firearms, I'm sure Brother James will make a suitable suggestion.