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Being away from Freehold is always hard for a True Christian ™ but never so hard as when one needs to see a doctor for minor ailments. Needless to say, one has to be more careful of who they choose as their doctor than they do in choosing which politician to support. At least the politician can only screw you figuratively (unless it’s a demoncrat), but I digress.
Recently, I had to go to the doctor to have a piece of shrapnel metal removed from my leg after a bit of work I’d done with local religious activists. I did my research, and had to settle on a doctor from one of the local Pentecostal churches. It was either him, or one of the many Hindu doctors who are flooding our beloved nation.
Anyway, he removed the errant piece of metal from my leg with minimal questions, but then went further by suggesting that I needed to have my prostate checked. I’m sorry to the younger, and female, members of our congregation who are reading this as I’m sure you’re shocked. I quickly responded, “What the hell does removing a bullet piece of errant metal from my body have to do with inserting your finger into me?”
He went into some stammering explanation about men of my age needing to have their prostate checked on a regular basis, and some crap about how there’s nothing to be embarrassed about. That’s when I really paid attention to the office around me.
Picture if you will a room filled with pictures of young nubile men, sweat glistening on their muscles, and a counter covered with one finger gloves. Well, that was enough for me. Promptly, I knocked this “doctor” on his proverbial ass, and got the hell out of there. I was so disturbed by this encounter that I spent the rest of the night on the phone to counselors (Pastors) in Freehold, filling them in on every detail of this obviously homersexual doctor’s attempt to lead me astray from the True Faith. Again and again I had to describe this doctor’s hands all over my legs until the Pastors were convinced that I was over the incident.
So if any of you should every find yourself away from Freehold for any length of time, pray that you have no occasion to have to see a doctor. Chances are, whether male or female, that non-believer doctor will do everything within his/her power to make you into a homersexual/lezbo.
Recently, I had to go to the doctor to have a piece of shrapnel metal removed from my leg after a bit of work I’d done with local religious activists. I did my research, and had to settle on a doctor from one of the local Pentecostal churches. It was either him, or one of the many Hindu doctors who are flooding our beloved nation.
Anyway, he removed the errant piece of metal from my leg with minimal questions, but then went further by suggesting that I needed to have my prostate checked. I’m sorry to the younger, and female, members of our congregation who are reading this as I’m sure you’re shocked. I quickly responded, “What the hell does removing a bullet piece of errant metal from my body have to do with inserting your finger into me?”
He went into some stammering explanation about men of my age needing to have their prostate checked on a regular basis, and some crap about how there’s nothing to be embarrassed about. That’s when I really paid attention to the office around me.
Picture if you will a room filled with pictures of young nubile men, sweat glistening on their muscles, and a counter covered with one finger gloves. Well, that was enough for me. Promptly, I knocked this “doctor” on his proverbial ass, and got the hell out of there. I was so disturbed by this encounter that I spent the rest of the night on the phone to counselors (Pastors) in Freehold, filling them in on every detail of this obviously homersexual doctor’s attempt to lead me astray from the True Faith. Again and again I had to describe this doctor’s hands all over my legs until the Pastors were convinced that I was over the incident.
So if any of you should every find yourself away from Freehold for any length of time, pray that you have no occasion to have to see a doctor. Chances are, whether male or female, that non-believer doctor will do everything within his/her power to make you into a homersexual/lezbo.
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