X
Collapse
 
  • Page of 1
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
Previous template Next
  • Pastor Ezekiel
    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
     
    • Sep 2006
    • 78556
    #1

    Tree Sex is a Perverted Sin!

    I am appalled and disgusted by this latest craze sweeping godless Scotland. Giving trees human names is bad enough (a practice picked up in godless Eugene, Oregon no doubt), but when perfectly useable white women start disrobing and fornicating with trees, things have gone too far.



    God gave them over to a reprobate mind ... without natural affection ... they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them. Romans 1:28-32
    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
    Tags: None
    • Witch Hammer
      True Christian™
      True Christian™
      • Sep 2006
      • 1717
      #2
      Re: Tree Sex is a Perverted Sin!

      Do hippies in the desert fornicate with cacti, I wonder?

      I guess wherever hippies go, they leave a flood of Jesus' tears in their wake.

        Comment

        • Roland
          Obese Swedish Meatball
          Delusional Forum Member
          • May 2014
          • 2193
          #3
          Re: Tree Sex is a Perverted Sin!

          Originally posted by Witch Hammer View Post
          Do hippies in the desert fornicate with cacti, I wonder?

          I guess wherever hippies go, they leave a flood of Jesus' tears in their wake.
          In the article, Emma mentions ¨a pleasurable pain sensation´, so I reckon having sexual relationships with cacti will be an even bigger thrill for these people.
          Jeremiah 6:21 Therefore thus saith the LORD, Behold, I will lay stumblingblocks before this people, and the fathers and the sons together shall fall upon them; the neighbour and his friend shall perish.

          Best wishes for the people in Ukraine.

            Comment

            • godsenpai
              Unsaved trash
              • Mar 2015
              • 2
              #4
              Re: Tree Sex is a Perverted Sin!

              We'll my pine girlfriend says otherwise
              This space for posting KJV passages only — Admin.

                Comment

                • Jim C. Lombardo
                  Confirmed Enemy of God
                  BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                  • Aug 2014
                  • 565
                  #5
                  Re: Tree Sex is a Perverted Sin!

                  I heard of blowing your seed, but this phenomena has me stumped.

                    Comment

                    • Alvin Moss
                      Serving Jesus
                      True Christian™
                      • Aug 2013
                      • 4468
                      #6
                      Re: Tree Sex is a Perverted Sin!

                      The Scots are a type of Englishmen. The English are known to worship trees. I have heard talk that they have "sacred groves" and things like that. Witches are somehow involved with this religion, but I am not quite sure what the connection is. This woman could be a witch and this could all be about some kind of sorcery. Also, I have heard that some of these witches use fornication in their spell casting. That is another possible aspect.

                      It would probably be best to go on and catch this witch and burn her. We can find her through the newspaper article and send representatives, possibly on Pastor Zeke's new jet airplane. I bet it would fly all the way over to Scotland.
                      God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11

                        Comment

                        • Jim Farmer
                          True Christian™
                          True Christian™
                          • Sep 2014
                          • 2293
                          #7
                          Re: Tree Sex is a Perverted Sin!

                          I wonder if Prince Charles is a member of this cult. He admits publicly to talking to plants and trees, but what about in private?
                          sigpic

                            Comment

                            Previous template Next
                            Working...