God Sinks Disney Jungle Boat

[Johny Joe Hold]

We here at Landover Baptist Church have made note of the Disney Corporation's homer friendly theme parks and sexually provocative movies. Disney may have thought God would not notice. But God will not be mocked.

Recently, a boat which carries the unaware into the theme park's jungle waters sank. Those aboard should have known better. Sin, especially that packaged as "fun", will be seen by God and punished:

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/disney-world-jungle-cruise-boat-sinks-with-passengers-on-board-in-mid-ride-mishap/ar-BB10ukV7?ocid=spartandhp

[upchucker67]

Re: God Sinks Disney Jungle Boat

"Even in my dreams shall be, nearer my God to thee..."

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: God Sinks Disney Jungle Boat

Disney World Jungle Cruise Boat
The ride, located in Magic Kingdom’s Adventureland area, is for all ages and lasts approximately 10 minutes, according to the official Disney World website, which describes it as a “journey that you won’t soon forget.”

The beloved attraction is best known for its quirky skippers, who entertain guests with jokes and puns throughout the riverboat excursion. Animatronic wildlife can also be seen along the banks.

I bet you'd soon forget it if you went on a month's electric eel fishing up the Amazon which, from what I've heard, would probably be cheaper. No hotel accommodation or cocktail bars, you sleep on the punt and collect drips from the leaves to drink. Poisonous frogs are probably free and the skippers will certainly be quirky...

[handmaiden]

Re: God Sinks Disney Jungle Boat

Aren't there Christian theme parks where one can book a vacation on Noah's Ark mucking out animal waste?

And a leisurely sail on the Red Sea with Jesus walking back home over the water would be a memorable attraction.

I'm not sure of the legality, but a little park where the children can get some exercise by stoning a homo seems like a real winner. I suppose they can use an animatronic homo. Just as long as they get the bleeding to look realistic.

[upchucker67]

Re: God Sinks Disney Jungle Boat

And a leisurely sail on the Red Sea with Jesus walking back home over the water would be a memorable attraction.

I'm not sure of the legality, but a little park where the children can get some exercise by stoning a homo seems like a real winner. I suppose they can use an animatronic homo. Just as long as they get the bleeding to look realistic.

I'd love to play the role of Jesus, just get me a cheap wig and my acting does the rest.


For the park's homer, could we please, please use Pete Buttgag? It would be a worthwhile outcome for his presumptive campaign for POTUS.

[WilliamJenningsBryan]

Re: God Sinks Disney Jungle Boat

Disney also needs to be reminded that those jungles are for cutting down the trees for houses, gates, and walls.

And a letter unto Asaph the keeper of the king's forest, that he may give me timber to make beams for the gates of the palace which appertained to the house, and for the wall of the city, and for the house that I shall enter into. And the king granted me, according to the good hand of my God upon me.

- Nehemiah 2:8

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: God Sinks Disney Jungle Boat

Disney announced today it is closing its amusement parks. Apparently the company could not endure God's wrath of sinking Jungle Boats and preachers like Pastor Zeke railing against them. Disney's sins caught up with them:

https://news.yahoo.com/disneyland-closing-amid-coronavirus-pandemic-093604365.html

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: God Sinks Disney Jungle Boat

However…the ban would not apply to Disney…casinos

Is there something wrong with me? Have I gone completely insane? I thought that secularists were pushing the idea that crowds were to be avoided? I would not ever actually enter a casino but they are portrayed in films sometimes, people pushing and shoving and squirming any which way they can to dump some tokens on a table, no doubt drooling over one another or "accidentally" bumping into someone for various reasons (all bad) and it didn't take long to find a photo. But in that piece you linked from Yahoo apparently casinos are exempt due to unique circumstances.

https://news.yahoo.com/disneyland-closing-amid-coronavirus-pandemic-093604365.html

The decision to close the park in California came after Governor Gavin Newsom banned all gatherings of more than 250 people across California to prevent the spread of the virus, which has now infected more than 127,000 people worldwide and killed at least 4,718. However, Newsom specified during a press conference that the ban would not apply to Disney parks or casinos, card rooms or theaters due to their "unique circumstance."

[upchucker67]

Re: God Sinks Disney Jungle Boat

Is there something wrong with me?

Yes, I noticed you have no body. This is very perturbing.

Have I gone completely insane?

Barking, if not blooming mad. I loved the casinos on Diamond Cruises.