Are your children spreading RACIST FAKE NEWS claiming the existence of Coronavirus?

[Social Construct]

ALBANY, New York -- The state University at Albany is investigating whether an off-campus coronavirus-themed party violated the college's student code of conduct, the university confirmed Thursday.

...the video showed a bucket of iced Corona beers and a person wearing a surgical mask with the caption, "Corona virus isn't gonna stop anyone from partying."

Cornavirus is a racist lie. We DEMAND that white people prove that they prioritize politeness over disease-prevention by passionately tongue-kissing the first Chinese person they come across to prove they are not racist. (If the Chinese person does not participate by providing enthusiastic consent, they are not true Chinese people, but cases of internalized-oppression - basically white people - who as white people deserve to be tongue-raped).

We DEMAND events to spread awareness of the nonexistence of cornoavirus. WE DEMAND free first-class tickets to Wuhan, free breathmints, and free lipstick (to prove the kissing has taken place.)

WE DEMAND that if someone cheers or claps at a cancer-fundraiser, they be rendered unemployable, because cancer-fundraisers lead to the mass stereotyping of cancer-identifying people, and also lots of deaths across the world.

WE DEMAND that white people stop appropriating Mexican culture by purchasing Corona beer. WE DEMAND a major tarriff on all foreign goods to prevent white people from committing cultural appropriation.

WE DEMAND that facemasks be banned, because they made me giggle to myself that Chinese people all look the same (while wearing the same masks) and that's a racist joke. Therefore facemasks are the gateway to the alt-right.

WE DEMAND the maximum possible punishment for anyone who sparks outrage.

WE DEMAND that you forward this everywhere, in whatever way that will spark maximum outrage.

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Are your children spreading RACIST FAKE NEWS claiming the existence of Coronavirus?

In answer to the question posed in the thread header, no. My children take no interest in foreign plagues.

WE DEMAND free first-class tickets to Wuhan, free breathmints, and free lipstick (to prove the kissing has taken place.)

In the spirit of 2 Corinthians 9:7, I am more than happy to provide you with a (non-refundable) one-way first-class ticket to Wuhan Tianhe airport, as soon as it reopens. If you wish to go sooner, the answer is probably to fly to Pyongyang and take the train. In either case, let me know when you have your visa. (You will also need a passport, by the way.)

Do you have a preference as to brand of breathmints and lipstick color?

[BrotherLarry]

Re: Are your children spreading RACIST FAKE NEWS claiming the existence of Coronavirus?

Hey Lady Gaga has a fabulous line of cosmetics these days. Ditch the maybelline and get with the Haus of Gaga.

Does anyone recall when I was moving to China??? I wonder if all this would have happened if I had been there. Surely not.

[upchucker67]

Re: Are your children spreading RACIST FAKE NEWS claiming the existence of Coronavirus?

My kids aren't allowed to read anything except the Bible, or touch the interwebs yet. Not until they're 21. As they are homeschooled, they needn't worry about the china kids.

[Jeb Stuart Thurmond]

Re: Are your children spreading RACIST FAKE NEWS claiming the existence of Coronavirus?

Friend, we would love to send you to Wuhan, or to a part of America that welcomes people from Wuhan (any sanctuary city) but Wuhan is quarantined, that means nobody enters or leaves.

And they get things done in China, when they say nobody enters or leaves, that's actually what happens.

I recommend you visit Indonesia, it has close trade links with China, 264,000,000 poor people, filthy slums, the works. Most of them live in Java which has a population density of 940 slumsters per square mile. Their plan for dealing with Cornoavirus is to deny it's there, and to credit prayer to Allah for the lack of recorded cases.

Now, since you consider unendurable poverty to mean being out of walking distance of a Starbucks, maybe South Korea would be less of a culture shock to you. Most of the Coronavirus cases there come from one building, a false-Christian Church that likes to cram it's members close together for long services - no doubt praying to be safe from Cornoavirus, prayers that God did not answer.

[upchucker67]

Re: Are your children spreading RACIST FAKE NEWS claiming the existence of Coronavirus?

And they get things done in China, when they say nobody enters or leaves, that's actually what happens.

It's like Willy Wonka's chocolate factory...

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Are your children spreading RACIST FAKE NEWS claiming the existence of Coronavirus?

It's like Willy Wonka's chocolate factory...

Perhaps an analogy from the Bible would be more appropriate than one from a third-rate children's story written by a Welshman.

[upchucker67]

Re: Are your children spreading RACIST FAKE NEWS claiming the existence of Coronavirus?

Perhaps an analogy from the Bible would be more appropriate than one from a third-rate children's story written by a Welshman.

A few choice places spring to mind.


DEUTERONOMY 2:37 Only unto the land of the children of Ammon thou camest not, nor unto any place of the river Jabbok, nor unto the cities in the mountains, nor unto whatsoever the Lord our God forbad us.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Are your children spreading RACIST FAKE NEWS claiming the existence of Coronavirus?

Their plan for dealing with Cornoavirus is to deny it's there, and to credit prayer to Allah for the lack of recorded cases.

Yet more evidence the Muslims are a bunch of confused, homoerotic obsessed tribal men, one cleric in Iran doesn't even promote prayer but rather essential oils to stimulate the anus.

[Jeb Stuart Thurmond]

Re: Are your children spreading RACIST FAKE NEWS claiming the existence of Coronavirus?

Iran doesn't even promote prayer but rather essential oils to stimulate the anus.

That's the place where the guy in charge of dealing with/denying coronavirus has just caught coronavirus?

Yuck it up folks, because the U. S. of Sneezin' A is not much better.

I just googled "how to survive a pandemic" and the first words I see are from a US government website telling me to:

Avoid close contact with people who are sick.

When you are sick...

Wait what?

I googled "how to survive a pandemic", not "how to die in a pandemic". The plan is to NOT get sick.

What's next?

How to survive school shootings.

Keep your face out of close contact with flying bullets

When you are shot in the face...

Uh guys, the whole point of this exercise is make my face remain un-shot.

TL;DR: we're all going to die.

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Are your children spreading RACIST FAKE NEWS claiming the existence of Coronavirus?

I'm glad the topic of racism was raised here in this thread. I've been traveling quite a bit recently on Freehold business and noticed something.

When there is a person wearing a mask in an airport, I noticed the person is always of the Asian race. Could it be Asian people are trying to disguise their race? What better way than by wearing masks.

[Sally Paulson]

Re: Are your children spreading RACIST FAKE NEWS claiming the existence of Coronavirus?

What's next?

How to survive school shootings.

Keep your face out of close contact with flying bullets

When you are shot in the face...

Relax, the US government also gave us Duck And Cover, and we never got nuked, right? Except maybe Detroit. Not sure what happened there.

Bert the "Turtle" seems to actually be a Galapagos Tortoise, so it seems the message is that in case of nuclear war head for the most isolated islands in the largest ocean on earth. For today that means make sure your learjet is gassed up.

Word does not seem to be getting out, because of the dated music, and lack of doe-eyed schoolgirls in the animation. To make "Duck and Cover" reach enough people, especially kids, they'll have to make it a porno:



"F*** and Cover."

[Isabella White]

Re: Are your children spreading RACIST FAKE NEWS claiming the existence of Coronavirus?

Gracious, goodness! Things seem to be happening so quickly with this silly virus that it's hard to keep up with the news. My sister (Agatha) just called to ask if I have Mother's recipe for Divinity (she couldn't remember the ratio of syrup to egg whites), and then one topic led to another with us finally getting around to discussing the virus situation.

Aggie informed me that that horrid Bernie Sanders has made a very disrespectful comment about our blessed Vice-President Pence and our -sent President Trump. This does not surprise me in the slightest, considering how Bernie is always waving his arms frantically and acting like a raving lunatic -- why he's not in the locked ward at Bellevue is beyond me. Anyway, what he's said is highly unfair and critical of Vice-President Pence for being in charge of the coronavirus response.

I am not pleased to link to Bernie's Twitter account, but I will do so here, just so my brothers and sisters at can see what horrible things he is saying:

"Trump's plan for the coronavirus so far: -Cut winter heating assistance for the poor -Have VP Pence, who wanted to "pray away" HIV epidemic, oversee the response -Let ex-pharma lobbyist Alex Azar refuse to guarantee affordable vaccines to all Disgusting."

https://twitter.com/SenSanders/status/1232825677960925185

[upchucker67]

Re: Are your children spreading RACIST FAKE NEWS claiming the existence of Coronavirus?

I am starting to feel better, and I think it's all thanks to Jesus -- but also Mike Pence. I heard him whispering in my sleep during my long nights in the Quarantine Rehabilitation/Treatment/Morgue Unit on the Diamond Princess. I can't remember what he was saying exactly, but it was in a low, prayer-like chant. Now it all makes sense.

This is my 100th post btw. A good cause to celebrate my recovery.

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Are your children spreading RACIST FAKE NEWS claiming the existence of Coronavirus?

"Trump's plan for the coronavirus so far: -Cut winter heating assistance for the poor -Have VP Pence, who wanted to "pray away" HIV epidemic, oversee the response -Let ex-pharma lobbyist Alex Azar refuse to guarantee affordable vaccines to all Disgusting."

So he thinks there's a vaccine for/against the corvid virus? Forgive me - I can never remember which way vaccines are supposed to work. Do they give you the disease or cure it? Either way, he's a silly old fool wanting something that doesn't even exist to be affordable.