My Introduction!

[RaeLynn]

Nice to meet you! My name is RaeLynn (I go by Rae), and I am a 26-year-old God-fearing woman. I live in God's great California with my husband, and our dog. I work as a teacher's assistant, and my husband is a pastor. I hope we can become good friends!

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: My Introduction!

Hello, and welcome to our friendly forums! Are we to understand you have your husband's permission to post here? Is there a reason you are still barren, dear? Have you angered the LORD, or are you homely and your husband has yet to do his familial duty? You know, a little blush and mascara can bring the youth out that you've lost. Or, for a more natural approach, pinch your cheeks just before he gets home at the end of the day. Have a nice meal waiting for him (oysters might be a good choice, if you know what I mean, wink-wink), and show him your willingness to be everything he desires in a woman, subservient, clean, quiet. I hope you report with good news soon!

[RaeLynn]

Re: My Introduction!

Hello, and welcome to our friendly forums! Are we to understand you have your husband's permission to post here? Is there a reason you are still barren, dear? Have you angered the LORD, or are you homely and your husband has yet to do his familial duty? You know, a little blush and mascara can bring the youth out that you've lost. Or, for a more natural approach, pinch your cheeks just before he gets home at the end of the day. Have a nice meal waiting for him (oysters might be a good choice, if you know what I mean, wink-wink), and show him your willingness to be everything he desires in a woman, subservient, clean, quiet. I hope you report with good news soon!

My husband has given me permission to post on this forum, save for posting things that he would not approve of. And I did forget to mention that we are expecting our first child, a little girl. We plan to name her Melody Faith. We love the name, and are looking forward to starting a family in which our children will know the law!

[Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson]

Re: My Introduction!

Nice to meet you! My name is RaeLynn (I go by Rae), and I am a 26-year-old God-fearing woman. I live in God's great California with my husband, and our dog. I work as a teacher's assistant, and my husband is a pastor. I hope we can become good friends!

Hello, dear! I'm Elizabeth, and I'm a younger, Christian wife, with my own happy brood of children and loving husband. Where do you work, and does your husband allow you to leave your home duties? Congrats on your daughter, but when is a son, a soldier for Christ, coming?

[Didymus Much]

Re: My Introduction!

...we are expecting our first child, a little girl...

How do you know that?

Oh, and the other 3/4s of your intro is still missing. Here's a hint: "...Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus..."

[Brother Jessup]

Re: My Introduction!

Nice to meet you! My name is RaeLynn (I go by Rae), and I am a 26-year-old God-fearing woman. I live in God's great California with my husband, and our dog. I work as a teacher's assistant, and my husband is a pastor. I hope we can become good friends!

Believe me, there is nothing great about California. It is a land where sin is encouraged, harlots and social deviants run rampant, and drugged out, tree hugging hippies dominate the state assembly, passing laws that would make Joseph Stalin look conservative.

Did I forget to mention that the state's communist governor, Jerry Brown, lived in sin with his current wife for fifteen years before he was finally forced into marrying her, most likely for political reasons.

It is a matter of time before God Almighty wills a great earthquake to take place which will cause the state to separate from the continent and sink into the sea.

I suggest that you move to neighboring Arizona before that happens.




The Honorable Brother Jessup T. Lloyd, Esq. has spoken....Amen!

[RaeLynn]

Re: My Introduction!

Hello, dear! I'm Elizabeth, and I'm a younger, Christian wife, with my own happy brood of children and loving husband. Where do you work, and does your husband allow you to leave your home duties? Congrats on your daughter, but when is a son, a soldier for Christ, coming?

It is so nice to make your acquaintance. I actually work from home as a virtual assistant, and spend most of my time in the home. We are hoping to have a son very soon.

[RaeLynn]

Re: My Introduction!

How do you know that?

Oh, and the other 3/4s of your intro is still missing. Here's a hint: "...Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus..."

Well...we have had an ultrasound, and we are expecting our daughter?


Oh...uh...well, we go to First Baptist in Willows, and my favorite Bible verses are Proverbs 31:26-28:


26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

[Didymus Much]

Re: My Introduction!

Well...we have had an ultrasound...

Why would you go to a doctor when the Bible says you should rely on faith and prayer to stay healthy?

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: My Introduction!

Well...we have had an ultrasound, and we are expecting our daughter?


Oh...uh...well, we go to First Baptist in Willows, and my favorite Bible verses are Proverbs 31:26-28:


26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

You do know that ultra sound has the effects of deadening the efferent nerve endings in a females nethers?

Where do you think lesbeans come from?

YIC

[RaeLynn]

Re: My Introduction!

Oh, I also noticed that the forum requested my favorite Bible verse?

My personal favorite is Romans 8:37-39.


No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

It really just shows the infinite love that Christ has for each and every one of us. And I know I am a sinner; one who decides to go my own way, and fall away from Him. But I also know that I am redeemed by the blood of Jesus, and He has made me white as snow!

[Didymus Much]

Re: My Introduction!

...It really just shows the infinite love that Christ has for each and every one of us...

Ah, yes, Paul's letter to the CHURCH IN ROME. Where he's clearly talking to and about CHRISTIANS. You know, people who do what the Bible tells them to do?

... And I know I am a sinner; one who decides to go my own way, and fall away from Him...

Matthew 7:21 "Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven."

So, NOT YOU.

....But I also know that I am redeemed by the blood of Jesus, and He has made me white as snow!

Hardly.

So when are you going to actually read the Bible as it is written, and realize that it says you have even less chance at Salvation than I (a blaspheming, irreverent heretic) do? At least I know what it says I'm supposed to do.

I'm not a Christian by my choice. You're not a Christian by your ignorance.

[RaeLynn]

Re: My Introduction!

Ah, yes, Paul's letter to the CHURCH IN ROME. Where he's clearly talking to and about CHRISTIANS. You know, people who do what the Bible tells them to do?

Matthew 7:21 "Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven."

So, NOT YOU.

Hardly.

So when are you going to actually read the Bible as it is written, and realize that it says you have even less chance at Salvation than I (a blaspheming, irreverent heretic) do? At least I know what it says I'm supposed to do.

I'm not a Christian by my choice. You're not a Christian by your ignorance.

I'm ignorant? Says the ***idiocy removed*** with nothing better to do than harass a young woman.


You say you know God, yet you show your ignorance to His Word by being cruel and harsh to a woman.


I WILL TALK BACK TO ANY MAN I CHOOSE. DO NOT USE YOUR STRAIGHT WHITE GUILT TO SILENCE ME.


Check mate, you limp-dicked sycophant. Hope your wife finds a man who can put out, rather than just huff.

[Didymus Much]

Re: My Introduction!

I'm ignorant?...

Yes. Look up the definition. You fit.

...Says the cunt with nothing better to do than harass a young woman...

You're welcome for the education, skank.

...You say you know God, yet you show your ignorance to His Word by being cruel and harsh to a woman...

Huh? What the f*** does your sex have to do with you being stupid, or my trying to correct that fact?

...I WILL TALK BACK TO ANY MAN I CHOOSE...

You're sexist, you know that?

...DO NOT USE YOUR STRAIGHT WHITE GUILT TO SILENCE ME...

...Check mate...

Hardly.

, you limp-dicked sycophant. Hope your wife finds a man who can put out, rather than just huff.

Hey, great job basing your argument on those stupid things called facts (or Scripture, of which you're still ignorant), bitch. /sarcasm

[Faith_Machine]

Re: My Introduction!

Well I'm thankful this crazy harlot was placed in quarantine where she belongs. I will pray for her.