Well hello there :)

[DolliMoans]

Hi y'all. It's me, Dolleen.

I love Christians! I should know. I'm one myself, and proud of it.

Well, a bit about myself, I'm a proud mother of 16 and growing!

My kids in birth order:

Adelaide
Eunice
Rush
Crusher
Truth
Lloyd
Mildrew
Angina
Scooter
Bud
Carson
Bobby
Modesty
Boomhauer
Donald

and my youngest, little Grenadine.

I keep them in my wallet to show off when I shop. They are my little troopers for Trump! It's a miracle Christians breed more than than those kid-shy lieberals.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Well hello there

Hi Dolleen! So glad you could finally join us! Tell us, do you home school that entire brood, or do you let them loose with a strong knowledge of the Holy Bible and let the Holy Spirit guide them through life? Just be careful, if that's what you do. A friend of mine's cousin goes to church with a lady whose sister converted to the Roman church not too long ago and now her 16 year old daughter has just joined a nunnery. She's too young to vote, serve in the military, or buy a glass of wine, but she'll be under the supervision of Papists without any outside contact (including family) for the next six years. In that time she'll be fully brainwashed and take her vows to be a slut for Satan in the whore's church. So be careful that you instruct your children well and they know how not to be sucked into bad theological arguments.

[DolliMoans]

Re: Well hello there

Hi Mary! -- you are so pretty, I must say!

I would never let my girls near papists. The first clue is the word paps in their name! Already, you know what those snatchmongers are after. So yes, to answer your question, they are homeschooled, and my older girls teach my youngins.

My eldest boys Crusher and Rush are linebackers at a good Christian college. Let's just say my husband and I are so proud of them both. We raised them right, and they got vouched for a godly school. The school halls are so much safer knowing they keep the fags in their place!

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Well hello there

Hi Mary! -- you are so pretty, I must say!

Why thank you! You are not the first to notice, of course. Lately people have been stopping me to tell me I look just like Kayleigh McEnany (she was recently promoted as the GOP Spokesman Lady)! It's been such fun when people ask me if I am she, and I get to ask them if they've opened their hearts to Jesus! I just love how Jesus makes these connections by walking people up to me like that!

My eldest boys Crusher and Rush are linebackers at a good Christian college. Let's just say my husband and I are so proud of them both. We raised them right, and they got vouched for a godly school. The school halls are so much safer knowing they keep the fags in their place!

How nice, dear. You must be very proud. And thank you for serving our country by raising men who would never dare be girly. Or tolerate one who does.

[Jim C. Lombardo]

Re: Well hello there

Welcome sister! I am impressed with the creative names for your spawn! Christians really do come up with the best kids names!

May your journey with Jesus on this site be fruitful.

[DolliMoans]

Re: Well hello there

Why thank you! You are not the first to notice, of course. Lately people have been stopping me to tell me I look just like Kayleigh McEnany (she was recently promoted as the GOP Spokesman Lady)! It's been such fun when people ask me if I am she, and I get to ask them if they've opened their hearts to Jesus! I just love how Jesus makes these connections by walking people up to me like that!






How nice, dear. You must be very proud. And thank you for serving our country by raising men who would never dare be girly. Or tolerate one who does.

The resemblance is uncanny! Have you considered dressing up as her, and when the kids come to your door this Jesusween, you give them Chick Tracts and extra-heavy Bibles instead of candy?

[DolliMoans]

Re: Well hello there

Welcome sister! I am impressed with the creative names for your spawn! Christians really do come up with the best kids names!

May your journey with Jesus on this site be fruitful.

Thank you Jimmy!

[Alan Swallows Waiting for Email Confirmation]

Re: Well hello there

Hi, Dolli, and welcome to the forum! Glad to hear you have a full quiver (Ps 127:4-5)! Children are a precious gift from the Lord. I only have one son so far because my wife has lady problems. Now I understand what guys like Abraham and Isaac went through.

Anyway, I was doing some research, and did you know that in Illinois the mortality rate for children under the age of 14 is 15 per 100,000? Which is just tragic, of course. Anyway, I was wondering if you had given any thought to what you would do if God decided to call home one of your little ones early. Do you have funeral insurance? Because in the unlikely event that something should happen to one of them, you would be able to give them the kind of send off they deserve. I imagine that with 16 kids the pennies are sometimes tight and you probably don't have enough money lying around to cover funeral costs up front. Insurance is a great way to protect yourself. I don't sell funeral insurance myself, but I do do prepaid funerals for those who've been certified True Christian(tm) by a Pastor. I pride myself on my restorative work.

Anyway, it's nice you have you on the forum. I hope you grow in grace while you're here.

[BrotherLarry]

Re: Well hello there

Greetings in the Name of our Precious Savior! (Jesus Christ)


I felt the Lord's Presence as I read your post. It is indeed becoming a rare thing for a woman to be enthused about motherhood and being a good helper for her husbandman.


The name "Crusher" just reached out to me and said, "Well, butter my buns and call me a biscuit." I would sure love to meet all of your sons one day and get down on my knees with them. Do you think that could be arranged? And by the way, is your Mildrew the same Mildrew who won the Illinois State Crochet Championships four times in a row? I think it was on some cable channel not that long ago.


I also have to comment on your noticing Sister Mary's beauty. When the Lord rushes over her with his honey, it can't help but leave sweetness in its wake. Jesus radiates through her smile and draws the lost and lonely to her so that she can witness of Christ's sacrifice on Calvary. Of course, she doesn't get to witness (or leave the house alone) as much as she'd like. And you might want to get her husband's permission if you plan on sending her anything or speaking on the phone with her or such. Good luck getting in touch with him, though. He is on "business trips" often when he's sober enough to travel.


I hope your journeys in this forum bring many blessings. And don't forget, I'd love to visit with all your boys sometime. Maybe we could work out and then share stories of Jesus in the locker room.


May Christ's JOY reside in your heart always,
BrotherLarry

[DolliMoans]

Re: Well hello there

Hi, Dolli, and welcome to the forum! Glad to hear you have a full quiver (Ps 127:4-5)! Children are a precious gift from the Lord. I only have one son so far because my wife has lady problems. Now I understand what guys like Abraham and Isaac went through.

Anyway, I was doing some research, and did you know that in Illinois the mortality rate for children under the age of 14 is 15 per 100,000? Which is just tragic, of course. Anyway, I was wondering if you had given any thought to what you would do if God decided to call home one of your little ones early. Do you have funeral insurance? Because in the unlikely event that something should happen to one of them, you would be able to give them the kind of send off they deserve. I imagine that with 16 kids the pennies are sometimes tight and you probably don't have enough money lying around to cover funeral costs up front. Insurance is a great way to protect yourself. I don't sell funeral insurance myself, but I do do prepaid funerals for those who've been certified True Christian™ by a Pastor. I pride myself on my restorative work.

Anyway, it's nice you have you on the forum. I hope you grow in grace while you're here.

Hello Mr. Swallows,

My husband will look into insurance for that soon. We already had to default on our loan for tornado insurance. It's why we need to have so many little troopers in the house. You don't know just when the Lord will call them home!

We lost one of ours, our baby Lysol two years ago in a tornado that came rip roarin' through the county. Our time together was so short, so sweet. God must have had higher plans for our angel because now she's in heaven waving hello.

[Roland]

Re: Well hello there

Hello Mr. Swallows,
We lost one of ours, our baby Lysol two years ago in a tornado that came rip roarin' through the county.

Hello Dolli,

That must have been very hard to cope with. Welcome to the forum.

Roland

[DolliMoans]

Re: Well hello there

Pardon for bumping my introduction. As some of you might be aware, I came out alive recently from a nasty fire that burnt down our trailer. Most of us left unscathed. Except for two:

I've updated the list of our kids to reflect the aftermath.

Adelaide
Eunice
Rush
Crusher
Truth
Lloyd
Mildrew
Angina
Scooter
Bud
Carson
Bobby
Modesty
Boomhauer
Donald
Grenadine
Lysol


Thankfully, I'm not completely past my child-bearing years, not completely. I'm still fertile, I think. Is there an immediate urge to replace the losses? Angina, I hate to admit it, was a blob of a girl (if you could even call her that), and perhaps was a mercy kill on God's part, but Bobby was only 12 and growing, and surely would have had a place among God's Infantry in the Holy War against Terrorism. I feel dutifully bound to replace the sabotaged artillery.