Hello from Canada!

[Petey_Peterson]

Dear Friends,


My name is Pastor Petey, and it is truly great to be on here, and surrounded with so many True Christian brothers. I'm out here ministering to a bunch of Godless Canadians, so this forum is a God-send! It truly is!


There are so many confused people out there thanks to the evils of atheism and their atheist God Richard Dawkins, and that other Kitchen's fellow. They use every lie at their disposal to mock our faith! Thankfully we are armed with Christ and common sense, something God-mockers are lacking in every sense!


So for a bit of an introductory dialogue, I thought I'd ask a question:


What do you think the BIGGEST atheist lie is?


I look forward to your comments.


YIC,


Pastor Petey

[Phil Ander]

Re: Hello from Canada!

I look forward to your comments.


YIC,


Pastor Petey

A bit more for you to do first - What church do you go to, how did you find Christ and what is your favorite Bible verse?


I know Canadians tend to be several sandwiches short of a picnic, so just take your time to read the introduction rules, and get back to us.


Phil

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Hello from Canada!

I know Canadians tend to be several sandwiches short of a picnic, so just take your time to read the introduction rules, and get back to us.
Phil

Good work, Brother Phil. So many imposters show up here. Best we vet someone like this well before engaging.

[Petey_Peterson]

Re: Hello from Canada!

A bit more for you to do first - What church do you go to, how did you find Christ and what is your favorite Bible verse?


I know Canadians tend to be several sandwiches short of a picnic, so just take your time to read the introduction rules, and get back to us.


Phil

Friend,

You are quite right to ask. Most Canadians out here don’teven speak True American, God’s favourit Language.

I’m originaly from Oklahoma, but out here to Minister to theUnsaved Trash here. Believe me, it needs it!

I can’t understand why so many have to travel so far toengage in proper Missionary Work, especially to some of those Africas Countrieswhere they dance around fires with bones through their noses, sacrificingChickens to who knows what False God? Most Canadians are a LOT worse! Probablybecause we’ve been sending Missionaries to those backwards Africas Countriesfor hundreds of years, whereas Canada is only 150 years old!!! So they have aLOT to catch up on!

As for favourite Bible Verse, I’d say John 8:7, as itteaches us a valuable lesson.

YIC

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Hello from Canada!

Hello Mr Peterson, and an extremely cautious

You do seem to be a little slow on the uptake. Are you of Viking descent, as your name suggests? Or perhaps Scotch. That would explain it. Let me draw your attention to the instructions at the top of the page:

The introduction forumAttention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

So far we seem to have ticked off your name and your favorite Bible verse (an "interesting" choice, for some value of that adjective). Would you like to share with us the lesson that you have drawn from it?

The sections I have helpfully highlighted in pink remain outstanding.

YiC
JL-V (Mrs)

[Isabella White]

Re: Hello from Canada!

Dear Friends,

My name is Pastor Petey, and it is truly great to be on here, and surrounded with so many True Christian brothers. I'm out here ministering to a bunch of Godless Canadians, so this forum is a God-send! It truly is!

YIC,

Pastor Petey

And, hello to you, dear Pastor Peterson. to . We are pleased that you have found us, within this confusing, tangled interwebs galaxy.

I see that you are living in Canada at the moment. My sister (Agatha) lived there for too-many years, and I used to visit her. It's a strange land, I must say, what with people saying "sorry" all of the time. Do you find that your outreach to the sinners is most successful when it's done in the parking lot of a Tim Horton's coffee shop? It seems that that's the favorite place for Canadians to congregate.

Please feel free to browse around our many forums at . You will find much to help you with your ministry; and, I must note that we use only the here — none of those watered-down versions for us.

May bless you, Dear, as you seek — here, at .

[Petey_Peterson]

Re: Hello from Canada!

Hello Mr Peterson, and an extremely cautious

You do seem to be a little slow on the uptake. Are you of Viking descent, as your name suggests? Or perhaps Scotch. That would explain it. Let me draw your attention to the instructions at the top of the page:
So far we seem to have ticked off your name and your favorite Bible verse (an "interesting" choice, for some value of that adjective). Would you like to share with us the lesson that you have drawn from it?

The sections I have helpfully highlighted in pink remain outstanding.

YiC
JL-V (Mrs)

I was born and raised Baptist, dear. I currently help out at Bethel Baptist Church out here in Quebec, and I can tell you things are in a bad way in Canada. Baptists have dropped from 12.8% of the population to just 1.9% in just the last ten years. They need all the saving they can get!!!


As for what I take from the glorious glorious Bible verse where our loving Lord saves a whore from the stoning she deserves, because those doing the stoning should also be stoning themselves for being worthless worthless trash, that should be obvious!


Praise!


YIC

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Hello from Canada!

I was born and raised Baptist, dear.

I would urge you not to address me, or any other True Christian(tm) woman, as "dear", dear. I read no further than that.

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Hello from Canada!

A Baptist in Quebec? Have my doubts. Holding Baptist Church with beer and doughnuts just doesn't happen.

[WWJDnow]

Re: Hello from Canada!

Hello, Pastor Petey, and welcome to the Landover Baptist Church! If you're looking to convert a bunch of Papists to the one true faith, you'll find a lot here that is useful.

I believe the biggest lie the atheists tell is that right and wrong is a matter of personal conscience rather than a divine mandate. This one idea lets them sin to their hearts' content, enjoying all sorts of sexual behaviors that don't involve one man and his wife in the missionary position without feeling any guilt. How disgusting!

[handmaiden]

Re: Hello from Canada!

[. . .] I thought I'd ask a question:


What do you think the BIGGEST atheist lie is?

That God does not exist--and atheists do.


Scratch an atheist with a pair of gardening shears (really any sharp-bladed instrument) and hear them call out "Oh, God!"

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Hello from Canada!

Do you have a Scripture for bones through noses? Obviously a pearl cluster hanging down I've forgotten what I was going to say next

or an iridium circlet or ruby-encrusted palladium ring

or gold or platinum spike

where they dance around fires with bones through their noses

You know I've heard there's "super doubters" who even doubt doubt itself. That would make them non-doubters wouldn't it? Or maybe indeterminate state-wise. Sort of like that ridiculous my enemy's enemy is my friend, and this is not the start of a joke but there's an Arab a Persian and a Turk. All follow a text requiring Christians to be enslaved or drilled through the head with a good-sized uranium slug.

From time to time one camp or the other will advocate less draconian aspects of this disgusting creed (currently for example I'm not too bothered by Sufi threats or risk of enslavement by whirling dervishes) (who are Turks) but later they could do what Muhammad ibn Abd al-Wahhab did in the 18th century: ushering in a Luther-styled reformation by reading the texts themselves: it could start tomorrow: once it's decided a decade is more than adequate.

They're more anathema for the Persians than for the Arabs (this year) presumably due to their Hanafi school having an Iranian origin. In that case enemies' enemies may be one's friend but it's more hierarchy-of-enemies than -of-friends. And (insofar as the text is concerned) We. Are. The. Enemy. None of them would be our friends: but there's still this nagging question: has the Islamic reformation already taken place?

So these super-doubters, who doubt even doubt itself, where do they fit on your spectrum? Are they a reformation too?

[Unfalsifiable]

Re: Hello from Canada!

I would urge you not to address me, or any other True Christian™ woman, as "dear", dear. I read no further than that.

That used to be a serious infraction. Don't ask me how I know that.


Surprised to see this hoser is getting away with it scot-free.

[Dr. Anthony J. Toole]

Re: Hello from Canada!

That used to be a serious infraction. Don't ask me how I know that.


Surprised to see this hoser is getting away with it scot-free.

If we were to censure our visitors before they have a chance to learn about Christ's love, we'd end up like the Baptists in Canada. Millennials and Gen-Z seem to need a safe space to spout their drivel before they come to their senses. That's why we foster a kindly Introduction forum where visitors can make elementary mistakes without fear of embarrassment.

[Uncle Rutherford]

Re: Hello from Canada!

That used to be a serious infraction. Don't ask me how I know that.


Surprised to see this hoser is getting away with it scot-free.

Jealousy is unbecoming of Christian folk. Jealousy of someone who maintains an unsaved trash title is a sign of someone who needs to do some more praying and reading their Bible. Know your place.