[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: hello...

"In addition, it sounds like you are a cripple of some kind" - My left leg is immobile.

"Your only hope it to stop wearing clown makeup, stop worshiping satan..." - Thats what im trying to tell you. Goths DONT worship satan.

Within five years SATAN will have developed stem cells that can regrow your leg like a gecko. But He will demand your soul in exchange. We accept you as you are insofar as you may tithe to the church, but you can never come into the house of the lord if your Robert-Thomas was damaged.

[Mistress Cookie]

Re: hello...

Thats what im trying to tell you. Goths DONT worship satan.

So you say.

But ask yourself this - - have they even once, in any conversation, mentioned:

Malachi 3:8 Will a man rob God? Yet ye have robbed me. But ye say, Wherein have we robbed thee? In tithes and offerings.

Or, more directly

Haggai 2:8 The silver is mine, and the gold is mine, saith the LORD of hosts.

If they have not encouraged you to tithe (here), they are very most certainly hastening your end.

[Reynald]

Re: hello...

The dark age is over. Keep that in mind. The church has minimum influence on people. If this is what god demands, in order to go to heaven, i would rather burn in hell, instead of spending all eternity with racists and ignorant bastards, like most of you are.

Most of you will burn in hell. I just know it. I just feel it.
Just because you memorised the entire bible, it doesnt mean you are the ones who decide where will i go. You are racists, redneck, wifebeaters. It should be quite ironic, when goths will lauth at you, burning in hell.

[Mistress Cookie]

Re: hello...

Your English and punctuation have improved remarkably since your initial post.

Landover is having a good effect on you already

PRAISE!

[Reynald]

Re: hello...

The only effect Landover gave me, is pain.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: hello...

The only effect Landover gave me, is pain.

That's ridiculous. We offered you a cure, even if JESUS will have to send your soul to HELL if that's what you want. We offered you Salvation™.

We have offered you compassion, and a way out of your psychotic depression. All that's left is death. Cold, black, and final. Don't take that path while you still have money to send to us.

[Mistress Cookie]

Re: hello...

The only effect Landover gave me, is pain.

This is natural, Reynald. Recovering from any illness can often be quite draining.

If I might suggest: lots of liquids, bedrest and prayer as your body adjusts to the shedding of your goth skin and the taking in of Landover Baptist Church™.

You have achieved a great thing here with us today. And I rejoice.

[Reynald]

Re: hello...

You missundertood. My faith is fading.

[Mistress Cookie]

Re: hello...

You missundertood. My faith is fading.

Then you've come to the right place, because being a True Christian™ will sweep all those blues away.

I would suggest that tomorrow, you NOT go to that old church that isn't working for you anymore, but join us here instead.

You will find peace and solace for all your ills.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: hello...

Most of you will burn in hell. I just know it. I just feel it.
Just because you memorised the entire bible, it doesnt mean you are the ones who decide where will i go. You are racists, redneck, wifebeaters. It should be quite ironic, when goths will lauth at you, burning in hell.

Do you genuinely not see the internal contradiction in your words? Anyway, we do not presume to decide on our own where people will go; we look to God's Word to tell us, since it is He Who will decide. If you intend to rebuke us, be sure to back it up with Scripture.

You missundertood. My faith is fading.

Once you find true faith through Landover Baptist Church, God will ensure that it does not fade:

Phil. 1:6: Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform [it] until the day of Jesus Christ:

[Reynald]

Re: hello...

Atleast my old church is not begging for donations.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: hello...

Atleast my old church is not begging for donations.

Then your old "church" mocks God and is an accessory to the fact in robbing Him. See the Bible verses that Cookie has quoted above on tithing.

[Reynald]

Re: hello...

Then your old "church" mocks God and is an accessory to the fact in robbing Him. See the Bible verses that Cookie has quoted above on tithing.

Is this your excuse for being greedy?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: hello...

Is this your excuse for being greedy?

Listen little girl; Jesus commands that everyone Tithe. Are you accusing Jesus of being greedy? Don't you think He needs your money?

He wouldn't ask for it if he didn't need it, right?

You God-mockers think you know more than Jesus I guess.

[Reynald]

Re: hello...

Jesus told you that people should give money to ignorant racist? I think i'll just keep donating to my local church. They dont go around begging like you, they earn the trust and love of they'r people.This bapist church of your's ave me a really bad first impresion.