A Warm Greeting From Brother Fyle!

[Brother Peter Fyle]

Hello Brothers and Sisters of Landover,

My Name is Brother Peter Fyle. I was a Youth Pastor for 5 wonderful years for a Church in Louisiana.

I am in search of a Youth Pastor position within your fine community or even an Assistant Youth Pastor. I have an awesome record of leading teens and pre-teens to the LORD! I love taking teen age boys on weekend get-aways to the mountain or whatever!

I am very hip and have even taught a few students to KRUNK for the LORD!

I feel like I would be a wonderful asset to your fine community.

I will be glad to answer any questions that you have for me....well except the last church I worked at in Louisiana... there is kind of a legal situation...but it's cool.

[Talitha]

Re: A Warm Greeting From Brother Fyle!

Welcome Brother.

Do you have any Bible Verses that inspire you?

[Eugene Hackwith]

Re: A Warm Greeting From Brother Fyle!

Welcome!

That's quite a form of dancing, if I may say so...

[Mistress Cookie]

Re: A Warm Greeting From Brother Fyle!

Is the child in the video possessed by demons? Why is he moving in that mysterious way?

But aside from that....I offer warm welcomes to you, Brother Fyle. The way to True Christianhood™ in Landover is a rocky and oft times trying one, yet many shall minister to your needs, should you prove worthy. (This is for the male Pastors to decide, of course, in the end.)

John 10:28 And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.

[SayvedByTheLord]

Re: A Warm Greeting From Brother Fyle!

Welcome Brother Fyle, we have good joo lawyers here they can help with any inconveniences or misunderstandings down in LA.

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: A Warm Greeting From Brother Fyle!

Good to meet you Brother Pete! Are you a married man son? Has your lovely Christian wife blessed with any little Fyles yet? I assume your church down south was an Independent Baptist Church. We don't get along very well with those False Christians that are part of The Southern Baptist Convention. They're a little on the liberal side, if you know what I mean.

[Brother Peter Fyle]

Re: A Warm Greeting From Brother Fyle!

Welcome Brother.

Do you have any Bible Verses that inspire you?

Why yes I do pretty lady it is:

Matthew 11:28-30
Jesus said, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke on you and learn from me, because I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and my load is not hard to carry.”

[Brother Peter Fyle]

Re: A Warm Greeting From Brother Fyle!

Thank you for the warm welcome friends! I feel blessed to have found such a tender community!

I hope there a lot of youngsters around here to teach. I have soooo much in store for them!

[Mistress Cookie]

Re: A Warm Greeting From Brother Fyle!

I hope there a lot of youngsters around here to teach. I have soooo much in store for them!

The children of Landover, like children everywhere, do sometimes need special training and guidance. We already have many worthy pastors who work with the boys, and they can sometimes appear (forgive me) "clannish" about their responsibilities.

I do not know if they will let you into their special prayer circle right away. But all good things come to those who wait....if one is a True Christian™, that is.

This is a lovely portrait of Tommy, who was in one of our live True Christian™ Stories dioramas last year. It may have been the Passion of the Christ series. Those events require a lot of intensive, one-on-one rehearsal time. Maybe after you've proven your faith and devotion, you will be allowed to help with those around the edges?

[Brother Peter Fyle]

Re: A Warm Greeting From Brother Fyle!

Cool!! Guess what? I finally saved up enough money to buy that van I wanted! Now I can drive to Freehold. I should be there in a few days if my van can make it. I'll be praying feverishly and hope my new friends in Freehold will as well.

Just think in a few days I'll be krunking with the kids in Freehold!



See ya soon!

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: A Warm Greeting From Brother Fyle!

The DOF has obtained a picture of your new van. Congratulations brother. See you soon.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: A Warm Greeting From Brother Fyle!

Just think in a few days I'll be krunking with the kids in Freehold!

See ya soon!

You will NEVER see me. I don't visit the cellars. But some of the wickedans down there will certainly be happy to see you. They are running out of food.

[WilliamJenningsBryan]

Re: A Warm Greeting From Brother Fyle!

Is the child in the video possessed by demons? Why is he moving in that mysterious way?

But aside from that....I offer warm welcomes to you, Brother Fyle. The way to True Christianhood™ in Landover is a rocky and oft times trying one, yet many shall minister to your needs, should you prove worthy. (This is for the male Pastors to decide, of course, in the end.)

John 10:28 And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.

That dancing and music strikes me as some kind of wigger black jive rap pennycostalism. I heard there was something like that going on in that church up there in Wassila, Alaska.