Jesus blessed

[William A]

Thanks to God almighty that i located this website. It truly is an inspiring and moving demonstration of people like me who are zealous for the lord, preaching to all those heathen swine who trample over the pearls god has so graciously lain out before them. God bless you all (christians that is) and curse you worthless unsaved trash.

[Mistress Cookie]

Re: Jesus blessed

Thanks to God almighty that i located this website.

Welcome, Banana.

I'm sure once the Pastors show up they'll want to know a bit about you, your religious training, what church you go to...just a heads up. You may as well just jump right in and show you're not hiding anything.

Best wishes....hope you make it through the Eye of the Needle, as it were.

[William A]

Re: Jesus blessed

I regularly attend the Sonora Presbyterian Church which is very strict and Godly, (unlike many presbyterian churches). I was raised in a strict Christian home and went to sunday school every week. I graduated College from Loma Linda University with a major in theology. The most important thing in my life is carrying out the will of the Lord or course. God bless you all.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Jesus blessed

I regularly attend the Sonora Presbyterian Church which is very strict and Godly, (unlike many presbyterian churches). I was raised in a strict Christian home and went to sunday school every week. I graduated College from Loma Linda University with a major in theology. The most important thing in my life is carrying out the will of the Lord or course. God bless you all.

Wait a bit, friend! Loma Linda University is a well know hangout for vegans and homers!

[William A]

Re: Jesus blessed

My parents forced me, but fear not, I have not succumbed to there satanic ways. i was there as a light for Jesus to set them right before God. Never would I dream of adopting there treason and filth as my own.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Jesus blessed

My parents forced me, but fear not, I have not succumbed to there satanic ways. i was there as a light for Jesus to set them right before God. Never would I dream of adopting there treason and filth as my own.

Well, you succumbed to skipping English class. How can you spell a polysyllabic word and use 'there' instead of 'their' twice in two sentences?

You are a troll aren't you.

[William A]

Re: Jesus blessed

Well, you succumbed to skipping English class. How can you spell a polysyllabic word and use 'there' instead of 'their' twice in two sentences?

You are a troll aren't you.

I was in a rush to study my bible, but I have no excuse. Forgive me for being so worthless and lazy. I promise to do better in the future.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Jesus blessed

I was in a rush to study my bible, but I have no excuse. Forgive me for being so worthless and lazy. I promise to do better in the future.

You aren't fooling anyone! You are a vegan and your brain is made of that canned Loma Linda brand stuff that is supposed to look and taste like meat but doesn't! I was a visiting Professor at Loma Linda for one day. My colleague invited me to his house and his entire family were walking dead from eating that mess. I hit the curb running.

[William A]

Re: Jesus blessed

You aren't fooling anyone! You are a vegan and your brain is made of that canned Loma Linda brand stuff that is supposed to look and taste like meat but doesn't! I was a visiting Professor at Loma Linda for one day. My colleague invited me to his house and his entire family were walking dead from eating that mess. I hit the curb running.

I'm sorry you had to endure that friend. I assure you that I take no part in the satanism that they exhibit. It was not my decision to attend. i pray for forgiveness every day for the evil act of even setting foot in that disgusting place. God has shown me the error of allowing my parents to control me so. I have repented in full and serve only the Lord Almighty. By the way, the only reason I attend the Presbyterian Church is that the Baptist Church here supports homos and lesbos, an obvious abhorrence to God. Peace in Christ.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Jesus blessed

the only reason I attend the Presbyterian Church is that the Baptist Church here supports homos and lesbos, an obvious abhorrence to God. Peace in Christ.

My GOD! Where are you.... California? Didn't you catch the first plane out after Loma Linda?

[William A]

Re: Jesus blessed

My GOD! Where are you.... California? Didn't you catch the first plane out after Loma Linda?

I did indeed. I currently live in Arkansas.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Jesus blessed

I did indeed. I currently live in Arkansas.

Well that's all right then, but I am still worried that the Baptist church there in Alma caters to gays. We'll send someone to talk to them.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Jesus blessed

What are you so obsessed with bananas for?

You talk like a queer, boy. And you don't even capitalize words like Christian or Bible.

[William A]

Re: Jesus blessed

Jesus, our Lord and perfect savior, created bananas, so I enjoy them. Sorry about the capitalization. (I was born into an evil family who didn't even speak English as their first language.) Horrible I know. I'll pray for forgiveness right away.

[Dr. Zaius]

Re: Jesus blessed

What are you so obsessed with bananas for?

What do you have against bananas?