[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Is Andreas a complete idiot?

Someone tithed ONE DOLLAR. Which of you homers is stealing the REST of JESUS' money?

[Enobarbus]

Re: Knowledge is power.

I posted some cash in the paypal account, am I good to go now?

Salvation comes not only through tithing (although that is very important) but through repentance and accepting the Lord as your Saviour©.

You will need to get all your financial papers, credit cards, etc, together and make an appointment with a Pastor about one of our affordable salvation schemes.

But don't forget the repentance either.

[Enobarbus]

Re: Knowledge is power.

I guess I am a Homer but I don't know what that means...

A homer is someone who indulges in the abomination of same-gender sexual relationships and therefore is on the road to perdition.

[Andreas]

Re: Knowledge is power.

Talitha is Sister Talitha's born again name that was assigned her after she achieved True Chrisitianhood™, and chosen only after a lot of deliberation, and prayer.

And when are you going to stop asking silly questions and start paying more attention to the good of your soul, Andreas?

I don't believe in the concept of soul. It's just brain and when it dies, it dies.

[Enobarbus]

Re: Knowledge is power.

Who named you Talitha anyway. It doesn't sound like common British name to me.

Talitha is Sister Talitha's born again name that was assigned her after she achieved True Chrisitianhood™, and chosen only after a lot of deliberation, and prayer.

And when are you going to stop asking silly questions and start paying more attention to the good of your soul, Andreas?

[Andreas]

Re: Knowledge is power.

I guess I am a Homer but I don't know what that means...

It means obsessed with the Simpsons.

[Spanky]

Re: Knowledge is power.

I guess I am a Homer but I don't know what that means...

[Andreas]

Re: Knowledge is power.

Spanky doesn't sound a very Christian™ name to me.

Are you some depraved Homer or do you come to find Jesus©?

Who named you Talitha anyway. It doesn't sound like common British name to me.

[Talitha]

Re: Knowledge is power.

Spanky doesn't sound a very Christian™ name to me.

Are you some depraved Homer or do you come to find Jesus©?

[Spanky]

Re: Knowledge is power.

I must add moneis from my visa card to cover that this month as I am in much debt. Kids called me Spanky when I was little and they never stopped...

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Knowledge is power.

10% of your income is the absolute minimum. Anything less than that doesn't even count. And of course, only giving the minimum does make you look like you have suspiciously Semitic tendencies. By the way, however did you acquire the name "Spanky"?

[Spanky]

Re: Knowledge is power.

I've never given money to a church before. I have done some bad things according to your KJV(1611) bible that you guys quote from. Will Landover Baptist forgive me and help me get to heaven?

[Spanky]

Re: Knowledge is power.

I hope it was enough, how much do you guys give?

[Spanky]

Re: Knowledge is power.

I posted some cash in the paypal account, am I good to go now?

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Knowledge is power.

You make good points. As for the name of the Bible I own ....it my Childrens Bible version. I can't get past the Thee's and Thous and so forth of the actual Bible without getting frustrated with it all.

If you had a complex safety manual for some dangerous electrical equipment, would you become frustrated and look for a kiddies' version of that? We are talking about the safety manual for your eternal soul here, it's worth getting the real version, and paying attention!