hello everybody!

[White_Kimbo]

i was raised both catholic AND jew (no foolin' i for really real was. i can talk in hebrew AND latin! double the devil worship double the damnation!) and i have discovered the true light of the unending love of jesus christ.

i hope that my time participating in this community is as fruitful as my time learning about this community!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: hello everybody!

If you cannot adhere to the standard rules of grammar, spelling and punctuation inherent in God's favorite language (American!), then we will have to ask you to leave.

That includes the reasonable use of the "Shift" key that God so thoughtfully provided your computer. God DOES care about grammar, you see.

"one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law" - Matthew 5:18

Being raised in a papist/joo household must have been horrible. You have my sympathies. Now it's time to get you Saved(r).

[White_Kimbo]

Re: hello everybody!

It was horrible, every year my Father would start shooting babies in the forhead with squirt guns to "baptize" them before my mother slit their throats to make matza bread with their blood.

but I am safe now. I cashed in my joo gold I got for my bar mitzva (that is hebrew for satanic initiation) and I almost have enough to put a down payment on a home in Freehold Iowa!

Can I have ex mary worship and ex christ killer medals please?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: hello everybody!

It was horrible, every year my Father would start shooting babies in the forhead with squirt guns to "baptize" them before my mother slit their throats to make matza bread with their blood.

but I am safe now. I cashed in my joo gold I got for my bar mitzva (that is hebrew for satanic initiation) and I almost have enough to put a down payment on a home in Freehold Iowa!

Can I have ex mary worship and ex christ killer medals please?

Let's not be too hasty here, friend. We need to get your preliminary DOF report, and we need to see (over time) that you aren't still a hebe. They're a tricky tribe you know. Satan has more than once sent folks in here posing as repentant Christ-killers in a vain effort to infiltrate God's favorite church.

Jesus is hip to their slip, believe me.

[White_Kimbo]

Re: hello everybody!

The proper spelling is heeb, but have no fear. In time, you will learn that I am a truly repentant Christ killer. My devotion to TRUE Christianity is unwavering.

Do you know the difference between a 2010 Lincoln Town Car with all the options and a waterboarding kit, custom made for papists and heebs is?

I don't have a Lincoln Town Car in my garage.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: hello everybody!

I hope you're not another one of those stealth Catholics.

How do you feel when I say that rather than being the "eternally virgin queen of heaven", and far from being "full of grace", Mary did the wild thing repeatedly with Joseph after Jesus was born and bore Him several half-brothers?

Does that induce feelings of rage?

[White_Kimbo]

Re: hello everybody!

I hope you're not another one of those stealth Catholics.

How do you feel when I say that rather than being the "eternally virgin queen of heaven", and far from being "full of grace", Mary did the wild thing repeatedly with Joseph after Jesus was born and bore Him several half-brothers?

Does that induce feelings of rage?

No, it doesn't induce rage, but it did help me get the last unfound rosary out of my house! As soon as your words hit my screen, a small fire broke out behind my couch, and sure enough, there was a string of papist anal beads that managed to escape the trash compactor.

Thank you Reverend!!!!!