Not bloody funny!

[blasf2]

I’ve been banned for life from at least 20 forums about religion!
I hope this is not another one.
All because I resist conversion, for Pete’s sake!
I tell my enemies that they can try evangelize me but only with POSITIVE information, to which they fail every time!
I live in Johannesburg.
I cut my finger nails twice a month.
I’m 61.
Pleased to meet you.
Have a sunny afternoon.

[Levi Jones]

Re: Not bloody funny!

I’ve been banned for life from at least 20 forums about religion!

I see you're planning on hitting on 20. That's usually a bad move and it should probably tell you something. Blackjack and discussing religion on the internet may not be cut out for you.

I hope this is not another one.

I don't guess you have looked at the user's list lately around these parts.

All because I resist conversion, for Pete’s sake!

Well, gosh! You seem like a real hard case. I just know we can make you believe in the Bible if you look around.

Maybe you should try that and come back with specific questions, if you have any.

I tell my enemies that they can try evangelize me but only with POSITIVE information, to which they fail every time!
I live in Johannesburg.

Well, gee willie golligers! I have been reading Deuteronomy lately. How about this?

Deuteronomy 7:9
Know therefore that the LORD thy God, he is God, the faithful God, which keepeth covenant and mercy with them that love him and keep his commandments to a thousand generations;

Is that positive enough for you? God loves us all these generations later!

I cut my finger nails twice a month.
I’m 61.
Pleased to meet you.
Have a sunny afternoon.

Um, okay. Same to you and whatnot.

[Jedediah]

Re: Not bloody funny!

John 14:6
Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.

Revelation 1:5-6
And from Jesus Christ, who is the faithful witness, and the first begotten of the dead, and the prince of the kings of the earth. Unto him that loved us, and washed us from our sins in his own blood,
And hath made us kings and priests unto God and his Father; to him be glory and dominion for ever and ever. Amen.

I see that reading comprehension is not your strong suit. Are you a Wiccan or something?

[Talitha]

Re: Not bloody funny!

I’ve been banned for life from at least 20 forums about religion!
I hope this is not another one.
All because I resist conversion, for Pete’s sake!
I tell my enemies that they can try evangelize me but only with POSITIVE information, to which they fail every time!
I live in Johannesburg.
I cut my finger nails twice a month.
I’m 61.
Pleased to meet you.
Have a sunny afternoon.

I've never met a nice South African

[blasf2]

Re: Not bloody funny!

Half South Africans are nice people, the other half are Christians.

[Talitha]

Re: Not bloody funny!

Half South Africans are nice people, the other half are Christians.

Friend,
In Freehold we are ALL NICE True Christians™.

Why do you have such hatred? Are you left-handed or something?

You really do need to find Salvation.
Have you been bathed in the warm blood of Our Lord Jesus Christ?
He died (temporarily) for YOUR Sins Brother.

[blasf2]

Re: Not bloody funny!

Hi, pastor.
How's it?
You try to convert me NEVER using Revelation, OK?
Only with nice & positive verses, it's the deal.
Revelation is the most brutal and despicable of Bible books.
I can prove it.

[Talitha]

Re: Not bloody funny!

Hi, pastor.
How's it?
You try to convert me NEVER using Revelation, OK?
Only with nice & positive verses, it's the deal.
Revelation is the most brutal and despicable of Bible books.
I can prove it.

Friend, we are not Fluffy-Bunny Salad Bar type Christians here.
We believe in all of The Bible.

[blasf2]

Re: Not bloody funny!

Friend,
In Freehold we are ALL NICE True Christians™.

Why do you have such hatred? Are you left-handed or something?

You really do need to find Salvation.
Have you been bathed in the wrm blood of Our Lord Jesus Christ?
He died (temporarily) for YOUR Sins Brother.

I'm a pragmatic believer.
I believe when it is necessary; I don't when it is wasting my time!

[Talitha]

Re: Not bloody funny!

I'm a pragmatic believer.
I believe when it is necessary; I don't when it is wasting my time!

We have but a short time on God's Earth, Friend.
When Judgment day comes and you get tossed into Hell for thinkig that Salvation is wasting time, then you will repent. Then it will be too late.

[blasf2]

Re: Not bloody funny!

Friend, we are not Fluffy-Bunny Salad Bar type Christians here.
We believe in all of The Bible.

Hi, Talitha.
Nice to meat you.
You believe in the full Bible?
Including the covers?
Oh, oh...
And where have you ever seen "THE" Bible, if I may ask?
My pragmatic approach, however, is this:
You believe the whole Bible, fine; and you allow me to believe the moon is made of [French] Roquefort cheese.

[Wide-Open]

Re: Not bloody funny!

Hi Friend.

You believe the whole Bible, fine; and you allow me to believe the moon is made of [French] Roquefort cheese.

Of course you are free to believe that (although we'd probably be able to smell it from here. ). God gave us free will.

But we do feel that we have to warn you for your French cheese believing lifestyle. You can't blame us for believing what we do, right?

[blasf2]

Re: Not bloody funny!

We have but a short time on God's Earth, Friend.
When Judgment day comes and you get tossed into Hell for thinkig that Salvation is wasting time, then you will repent. Then it will be too late.

Talitha, please listen carefully, my dear:
Try to convert me without ever mentioning your CULT's negatives, OK?
Thanks.
Have a week of sunny afternoons.

[Talitha]

Re: Not bloody funny!

Hi, Talitha.
Nice to meat you.
You believe in the full Bible?
Including the covers?
Oh, oh...
And where have you ever seen "THE" Bible, if I may ask?
My pragmatic approach, however, is this:
You believe the whole Bible, fine; and you allow me to believe the moon is made of [French] Roquefort cheese.

You can believe in what you wish, my friend.
Have you been to the Moon? Do you have a Spaceship?
I think you have delusions.
I have my very own Leather Bound deluxe version of The King James Bible.
Only Jesus will steer you towards Heaven.

[Talitha]

Re: Not bloody funny!

Talitha, please listen carefully, my dear:
Try to convert me without ever mentioning your CULT's negatives, OK?
Thanks.
Have a week of sunny afternoons.

Why should I want to "Convert" you?
The Lord gave us free will so that we can make our own choices.

There are no negatives in The Bible.
If a person cannot follow the complete will of God then they are not a True Christian™.

You have a nice week of sunny afternoons too