An Introduction

[Liam Calb]

My name is Liam Calb, as you can see. I lived in Nigeria for much of my life, but I now reside in the United Kingdom. I stumbled upon this forum, and I now wish to communicate with you folk in order to further understand the intricacies of the Christian faith, and your interpretation of the true word of God. Below I shall post what I think to be my favoured religious text, describing somewhat the nature of enlightment as depicted in a particular holy text.

Chikodzi 2:1-4 Enlightenment of the methods in which I created my universe, and the subsequent division of these, could be compared to that of growing a banana tree within the folds of a biting cold nation, or endeavouring to herd sheep in the sweeping plains of a division not far below my home.

[Levi Jones]

Re: An Introduction

My name is Liam Calb, as you can see. I lived in Nigeria for much of my life, but I now reside in the United Kingdom.

No, you can't have any money. I learned my lesson about that the hard way!

I stumbled upon this forum, and I now wish to communicate with you folk in order to further understand the intricacies of the Christian faith, and your interpretation of the true word of God.

So you can better part godly American Christians from their hard earned money? I don't think so, boy.

Below I shall post what I think to be my favoured religious text, describing somewhat the nature of enlightment as depicted in a particular holy text.

Chikodzi 2:1-4 Enlightenment of the methods in which I created my universe, and the subsequent division of these, could be compared to that of growing a banana tree within the folds of a biting cold nation, or endeavouring to herd sheep in the sweeping plains of a division not far below my home.

What manner of heresy is this? I'm pretty sure we're going to need an exorcism in this thread.

[Liam Calb]

Re: An Introduction

No, you can't have any money. I learned my lesson about that the hard way!

I'm afraid I don't understand this response. When did anybody mention money?

So you can better part godly American Christians from their hard earned money? I don't think so, boy.

Again, when did anybody mention money? Surely it is 'ungodly' for you to have money on your mind all the time?

What manner of heresy is this? I'm pretty sure we're going to need an exorcism in this thread.

I sense the mischief of Sitruc here.

[Levi Jones]

Re: An Introduction

I'm afraid I don't understand this response. When did anybody mention money?
Again, when did anybody mention money? Surely it is 'ungodly' for you to have money on your mind all the time?
I sense the mischief of Sitruc here.

Listen boy, we know all about you Nigerians.

What is Sitruc? Is that the demon you worship? We're definitely going to need an exorcism here.

[Liam Calb]

Re: An Introduction

What is Sitruc? Is that the demon you worship? We're definitely going to need an exorcism here.

How dare you suggest that I am a worshipper of Sitruc! Sitruc is an evil and mischievous being, not unlike your 'devil'.

[Levi Jones]

Re: An Introduction

How dare you suggest that I am a worshipper of Sitruc! Sitruc is an evil and mischievous being, not unlike your 'devil'.

I think you just made that name up.

[Liam Calb]

Re: An Introduction

I think you just made that name up.

Allow me to quote you the Book of Saffrey:

“My name is SAFFREY, and I have the gravest tidings.” he spoke with such confidence, in a voice that boomed across the sullen ground. Excellence protruded from his body in such vigorous shapes, imbuing fear into those who would not try to understand him. “A being of much evil has happened into creation, and he must be stopped. It has been told that Sitruc is his name, and one is his number.”

[Grandmother Wilson]

Re: An Introduction

How dare you suggest that I am a worshipper of Sitruc! Sitruc is an evil and mischievous being, not unlike your 'devil'.

Sweet Lord Jesus,

Please rebuke this evil demon, Lord, who tried to attack Your Forums!
Please let him know that You, and You alone, are God, and lead him away from his disgusting false religion, which will land him in Hell. For it is not Your Will that he is a devil worshipper, and it is not Your Will that Dear Young Pastor Levi is insulted by this Godless person. Yes, you will destroy all evil false gods the heathens worship. Please remind us of Your Love and Justice, Lord.

In Jesus Name,

Amen.

[Liam Calb]

Re: An Introduction

Sweet Lord Jesus,

Please rebuke this evil demon, Lord, who tried to attack Your Forums!
Please let him know that You, and You alone, are God, and lead him away from his disgusting false religion, which will land him in Hell. For it is not Your Will that he is a devil worshipper, and it is not Your Will that Dear Young Pastor Levi is insulted by this Godless person. Yes, you will destroy all evil false gods the heathens worship. Please remind us of Your Love and Justice, Lord.

In Jesus Name,

Amen.

An interesting retort, although it does not hinder me. I do not fear this 'Jesus'. Moreover, your hatred of me is hurtful and confusing, and I do not understand how a religion that teaches love, compassion and tolerance can produce people devoid of all those aspects.

[Warthogg]

Re: An Introduction

Mr. Calb,
The Baptist faith is not exactly the prime example of Christianity, or Americans. If you're looking to learn more about American Christians, you'd be better off in a Catholic, or even certain Protestant forums.
These people, harbor deep hatred towards any non-White, non-American, non-Baptist people. You're going to be hard pressed to get any straight answers from these people.
I apologize if I offend any Baptists, I love you all, just not you beliefs and actions.

[Liam Calb]

Re: An Introduction

Mr. Calb,
The Baptist faith is not exactly the prime example of Christianity, or Americans. If you're looking to learn more about American Christians, you'd be better off in a Catholic, or even certain Protestant forums.
These people, harbor deep hatred towards any non-White, non-American, non-Baptist people. You're going to be hard pressed to get any straight answers from these people.
I apologize if I offend any Baptists, I love you all, just not you beliefs and actions.

Thank you very much; I shall take what you have said into account. It is nice to hear a friendly response!

[James Dewitt]

Re: An Introduction

Mr. Calb,
The Baptist faith is not exactly the prime example of Christianity, or Americans. If you're looking to learn more about American Christians, you'd be better off in a Catholic, or even certain Protestant forums.
These people, harbor deep hatred towards any non-White, non-American, non-Baptist people. You're going to be hard pressed to get any straight answers from these people.
I apologize if I offend any Baptists, I love you all, just not you beliefs and actions.

Do not listen to this person. Papist, Mary worshipping, ring kisser. Not even close to being a Christian. Boy don't you have an alter boy to molest?

[Rasheed]

Re: An Introduction

I do not wish to be racist (the Qur'an teaches tolerance of all mankind) but it's a well known fact that 90% of Nigerians on the internet are scammers and the other 10% aren't even from Nigeria (although you have to wonder why they would pretend to be from such a backwards country).

Wrathgarr, forgive my bad English - it is not my native language. Do you suffer with.. what would be the word.. retardation?

[James Dewitt]

Re: An Introduction

I do not wish to be racist (the Qur'an teaches tolerance of all mankind) but it's a well known fact that 90% of Nigerians on the internet are scammers and the other 10% aren't even from Nigeria (although you have to wonder why they would pretend to be from such a backwards country).

Wrathgarr, forgive my bad English - it is not my native language. Do you suffer with.. what would be the word.. retardation?

Ill be a darn mooslim bagged a niggra from Nigeria and a catlik all in one post!

[Warthogg]

Re: An Introduction

Ill be a darn mooslim bagged a niggra from Nigeria and a catlik all in one post!

The way you speak makes me fear for the future of this country.

@Rasheem I am not retarded. What's retarded is to group people together and make brash assumptions about them.