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  • #1

    Friends, I am saved!

    It is such a relief to find like minded friends - it is truly a gift from God.

    My life has been a tale of mammon and creaturliness. Before I discovered the word the only Trinity in my life was a line of coke and some DP with some poor fallen child of the street.

    But now I am saved. I am among friends and we can together bear witness to the word.

    Please welcome me among you - I look forward to sharing and learning about our saviour, our Lord. I have indeed been born again.

    Hezekiah
    Tags: None
  • #2
    Re: Friends, I am saved!

    Originally posted by Hezekiah View Post
    Before I discovered the word the only Trinity in my life was a line of coke and some DP with some poor fallen child of the street.


    Hezekiah
    Only one line? Plus, I'm not sure what DP is supposed to refer to so I'll assume that you're referring to "Double Prayer". You should be praised for your effort to help the needy.
    May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

    Comment

    • #3
      Re: Friends, I am saved!

      Originally posted by Hezekiah View Post
      ...now I am saved. I am among friends and we can together bear witness to the word.
      Hey, Hezzie, that's a fine introduction. You have come to the right place, for we offer guaranteed salvation. Try to find that at any other church!

      Please welcome me among you - I look forward to sharing and learning about our saviour, our Lord. I have indeed been born again.
      I have a few ideas for how you might get into the swing of things. First, you need to buy a King James 1611 version Bible if you don't already have one, preferably one of the more expensive printings with a real leather cover. You should definitely check out Brother V's Bible in a Decade thread for expert commentary to help you understand the Living Word. And please contact one of our pastors ASAP to arrange a tithing plan--a first class salvation doesn't come cheap.
      The Christian Right: The Only Right Way to Be a Christian!

      Comment

      • #4
        Re: Friends, I am saved!

        Welcome to God's favorite forum. What church do you attend? Please tell us about the winding path you took to find Jesus. With a name like yours, I'm guessing you come from Bible folk.
        Who Will Jesus Damn?

        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

        Comment

        • #5
          Re: Friends, I am saved!

          How many sons have you?
          What is your favorite hunting rifle?
          Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
          Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
          Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
          Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
          Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
          Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

          Comment

          • #6
            Re: Friends, I am saved!

            My journey matters not, it is my salvation that I bring upon the world.

            I was walking in a barren land and was struck blind and dumb with revelation. It was then that I chose the name Hezekiah, God gives strength, as it was strength I needed to climb to the narrow path of the righteous.

            I am now amongst you to bear witness, to live as an ascetic feeling the pain of our Lord. Indeed when I am too weak to bear the pain unto myself there is a nice lady in the apartment next door who has the most delicious instruments to remind me how Jesus suffered for us, and when she is done with her instruments she smites me with her bare hands. John 19:1-3

            "Then Pilate therefore took Jesus, and scourged him. And the soldiers platted a crown of thorns and put on his head, and they put on him a purple robe And said, Hail, King of the Jews! and they smote him with their hands."

            At times she also likes to remind me of the Last Supper where she acts as Satan, John 13:27

            "And after the sop Satan entered into him. Then said Jesus unto him, That thou doest, do quickly."

            After she has entered into me we pray and give thanks to our Lord for saving our poor souls.



            PS No sons yet, but I like guns.

            Comment

            • #7
              Re: Friends, I am saved!

              Originally posted by Hezekiah View Post
              My journey matters not, it is my salvation that I bring upon the world.
              No, your journey matters a lot, and so far I am not convinced that you are bringing any "salvation upon the world."

              Please answer my questions.
              Who Will Jesus Damn?

              Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

              Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

              Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

              Comment

              • #8
                Re: Friends, I am saved!

                Forgive me Pastor - my exuberance at new found friendship has led me from the path.

                I was born of a fallen woman in a home for fallen women and an unknown father. I was blessed to be taken in and adopted by a priest of the Anglican church, and his family, and I was baptised as an infant and confirmed into the Anglican faith.

                In my teens I lost my way with the temptations of Satan luring away from a path of righteousness to the pit of sin. Mammon became my God (forgive me for this blasphemy) and for many years this was my path. I then found personal transformation with that great preacher Tony Robbins, but he was a false prophet and it was an empty life without God in it.

                It was then that I came upon my local Baptist church in York where I was taken in as a friend and the emptiness was filled by God unfettered by the High Church trappings of the all but Papist Anglican Church.

                I was immersed and born again. Weekly we sit in fellowship and again I feel whole.

                Comment

                • #9
                  Re: Friends, I am saved!

                  May I suggest you read the King James Version 1611 Bible? It will complete your life and that of everyone else.

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    Re: Friends, I am saved!

                    Is your wife submissive and a good cook?

                    Comment

                    • #11
                      Re: Friends, I am saved!

                      Originally posted by Hezekiah View Post
                      [[SNIP!]]I was born of a fallen woman in a home for fallen women and an unknown father.[[SNIP!]]
                      Somebody correct me if I'm wrong, but don't it take ten generations to get the "bastard" outta the blood and make a righteous bloodline again?

                      YIC


                      Sanctimony
                      “…If however the charge is true and no proof of the girl’s virginity can be found, she shall be brought to the door of her father's house and there the men of her town shall stone her to death..." Deuteronomy 22:13-21

                      Trust me, boys. . . I'm a virgin.

                      Comment

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